Oh, I was totally being tongue in cheek about my kids blaming me anyway so I might as well earn it :-) I'm working very hard on being what I think is a good parent, but also not letting my kids control my whole life and not doing everything for them. I think I will raise the most independent kids if they see a mom with her own life too. I think its all about balance. We are heavily into travel sports, and we see so many parents whose entire life is centered around the kids, their sports, and their school projects. I just don't think that can be healthy for kids to grow up thinking everything centers around them but it seems the norm now.

My kids get so angry when I say 'no, you can't do this because we already have plans' and I hear "that so and so's Mom cancels her plans so they can......" My usual retort is that if this is the worst thing that ever happens to them they'll end up just fine.

Great point Crankin about forgiving is not forgetting. I think society sometimes doesn't get that these aren't the same things.