Safer to raise kids in suburbs vs. closer to perceived "vices", crime, etc.

[shootingstar]

We had all the usual teen issues, just like the suburban town my kids grew up in, which is much more isolated, almost rural, compared to my hometown. Why were you surprised that straight A students got pregnant? Smart kids have sex! One would like to think that a smart kid would use birth control, but after 30+ years of working with teens, I can tell you that doesn't happen all of the time.
And today, the kind of neighborhood you grew up in doesn't exist anywhere around where I live. Neighborhoods are segregated by income/SES, more than racial identity. A poor family could not afford to buy even a dilapidated home where the college professors and police chief live.
My son lives in a different close in suburb with his wife. It has a much more city-like feel. Around here, towns are very stratified by class, so some places have more professionals and other places are more blue collar suburbs. It's always been like this here, but now, it's worse than when I grew up. It will be interesting to see what my son does when his child nears school age. They have a home, a nice home, but on a busy street, in a blue collar suburb. It's a more up and coming place. I would not send my kids to school in the place he lives, because they are not so great. Maybe average, at best. He could afford to move to a town with better schools if he sold his home, so I can't predict. Both he and his wife, who grew up in the city, are city type people. But, it really did not work for her. The schools in Boston are only OK if you are in advanced classes in elementary school (she was) and get into one of the 3 exam schools. She missed getting in by one point on the entrance exam, went to the local middle school in grade 7, where she got called "white girl," and felt generally threatened. Because her parents weren't capable of helping her, she got herself into a Friends school for grade 8 and then a prep school that is arts based for HS. She got a scholarship and had to arrange for and pay for transportation on the commuter rail, out to the school. So while it is not like that where my son lives, I hope she learned soething from her experience. They can't afford private school at 30K a year.

At the time I was growing up, maybe I was more "protected" in terms of my circle of school friends. Growing up in a smaller city (pop. of 50,000 at the time) with 2 universities. It probably was incredibly naïve of me at that time, when I was 17-19 yr. old that even the smartest girls at my age, could get pregnant. And probably slightly snotty naïve to believe, "smart" meant taking birth control precaution... But most likely my teenager response at that time, would have been no different than other girls who had a similar background as myself. We're looking back , and commenting as adults, experienced in life.

Nowadays, yes, it's just less chance of mixed income neighbourhood given the higher housing prices in 1 neighbourhood.

I guess race and schoolchildren experiences vary..... I went to the county's oldest high school (inner city that actually a lot of students wanted to/some did transfer from other areas, because school was lst to go on semester system and some good teachers at the upper level grade courses) of 2,000 students. There were 25 students of Asian descent, about same number for blacks and East Indians. Usually others were your siblings.

What was interesting were some of the girls who transferred from all-girl Catholic school into our final HS year. The ones who did, were not only very good academically, but also just seemed more "mature", confident and articulate, than some of us similar academically strong and well-rounded students. So all-girls' school for some girls, helped them.

I really had to move to Toronto....I had learn to get lost among locals with Asian faces. It was important ..for myself...to self-identify by my strengths and skills. And I could "grow" better in every sense of the word. My personal long term interests at that stage in life 20's -30's were more strongly aligned and found in very large, metropolitan cities where people were freer to be creative, to speak out on social justice matters. I think this too, some people might feel intimidated/overwhelmed because it might look unsettling/disruptive to them. So a smaller town or suburban area might be better...
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

My partner spent a huge chunk of his elementary school, HS and university commuting 10-50 km. one way by bus from a rural area. For latter it was into downtown Toronto. His opinion of car-driven lifestyle is heavily influenced by this.. His children were raised in downtown Toronto in reasonably "safe" neighbourhoods, places where residents cared for their homes ..yes, they went to good schools and some good close friends. Yes, they did take subway and transit on their own to high school and to live with each parent located within the 10 km. radius after the divorce. The children tended to hang around with friends who also took transit but most of all, it was important they each felt comfortable, trust to tell a parent if they were bullied, etc.

Mixed racial neighbourhoods can make a difference, especially in large metropolitan cities if there are some reasonable neighbours from different backgrounds. I think it's important especially in big cities...to tone down the temperature of racial division.