Don't answer the phone?
You won't change them. Call back, if you do, when you want.
Hey, mine only called to tell us what to do . My FIL was a terrible person, with untreated mental health issues and an abuser when DH was young. MIL was better after he died, but by then, she was already not herself from medical issues. It all could have been avoided if she had had help (which she refused) when he got sick. They were both young-ish when they died, and I can't say that DH was sad. Some people think this is very cold, but some people just shouldn't be parents, especially parents of 4 kids. He was much closer to my family.