Commuting by bike is against the Constitution

[Trek420]

Yep, it's obviously a slippery slope to the downfall of civilization

If you let people ride safely, legally, well and looking faaaaabulous in their TE gear (check it out, there's FREE SHIPPING on orders over $100) at first yeah, sure they say they love only one lifetime steel lugged bike. They're going to want multiple bikes. And they may want to ride with a Wald basket or Burley dog trailer and then animals are involved.

And think of the children; do you want your children seeing that riding a bike is acceptable? "don't look son, those are cyclists. Quick, get back in the SUV, have a slurpie and some chips. I'll turn on the DVD. What? Your sister doesn't want to watch that movie? She has her own screen on the back of your Mom's seat. It's only 2 blocks, we'll be home soon".

And it's not just your kids. The children of cyclists get teased on the playground because their parents wear those funny pants and are fitter, look younger regardless of their real age and are just plain healthier than the other parents.