Learn to ride with your mouth closed. This is especially important when riding at dusk past the swamp. Let's not have a repeat of that recent "snack," okay?

Get sunglasses. You have better things to do than pick bugs out of your eyes for the 24 hours after a ride. Really.

It's not the best idea to sing, "The runners and walkers look so glum when they're striding/but I've got bugs in my teeth 'cause I smile when I'm riding!" when you're passing a runner. Especially a fast, angry runner. Especially at the incredibly slow speeds at which you ride. Similarly, it's not a good idea to sing this in the elevator on your way back to your office after a ride unless you've stopped in the bathroom downstairs to smile at a mirror and... ummm... take care of things. (You know what I mean by this, I'm sure.)

Check the seams of your riding shorts before you head out. 'nough said there, I trust.