Oh come on, you're the BOMB riding 30 to 40 miles a day! That's all that counts, that you like to ride your bike and get out there and do it!

I rode "alone" i.e. no club, mostly commuting for many years, and just did things my own way. Whatever worked, whatever I could afford. I was a bit shocked to discover the "style police" once I started hobnobbing with club riders, for the first time I found out there's a way you're "supposed" to do a lot of things. Ten to one I'd been doing them "wrong". Now some things are smart to know - it helps to *know* about chamois and wicking clothing if you're uncomfortable on a bike, but a lot of it is just techie talk and has very little to do with riding. A lot of cyclists love fixing up their bikes with all the matching doodads. A lot of them looove having the perfect bike clothing for any weather and any temperature (I'm one of those ) Others will spend a fortune for The Most Perfect lighting system. Others get a kick out of doing all their own wrenching. But it's just details, and none of this will necessarily make you a faster or safer or better rider. It's just spillover, obsessing about certain things to do with biking.

As a student I rode for years in soft worn out sneakers on platform pedals, all winter too with thick wool socks inside. Worked beautifully. I have a spanking new Jett saddle on my road bike, but still have the original hammocky saddle on my 10 yr old commuter. It's fine. My dh commuted an hour and a half every day in hacked off jeans. He has skinny legs but he's really wiry and strong, and he got a huge kick out of dropping the lycra-clad commuterboyz.

I swear, you're just as much or more of a cyclist as anyone else here! FWIW, I think the mtb crowd seem to be a little less gearfocused than the roadies.

ps. post a photo of your cleats and I'm sure somebody can tell yopu what kind they are and where to get new ones, if you'd rather not go to the lbs.