Consider that wide, knobby tires, even on pavement, have a VERY different ride feel than skinny road tires. Also much of your courses will be dirt/grass/mud/sand. My first road bike was aluminum (just upgraded to carbon), and it's not nearly as bad as it is portrayed, in my opinion. Definitely harsher than carbon or steel, but the jarring comes not so much from *big bumps* like you'd encounter on a trail, but from constant road chatter that doesn't get damped. However, as said before, wide low-pressure tires will eat that up, and it isn't likely to be as big of a deal on non-paved/gravel surfaces.
As for crashes -- steel bends, alu fails. Which is stronger depends on the alloy, but I wouldn't say steel is necessarily *generally* stronger. It is easier to weld back into shape though, so a wrecked frame may be salvageable.
Anyway, people have material preferences and that's fine, I'm not trying to convert you (not like I'm a massive aluminum fan or anything), I just think it's probably worth at least testing a few, you may find it a bit racier feeling than steel while not being quite as harsh as you expect...
(Edit: by the way, please cut me a little slack if this post and/or the previous one seemed a little, um, lacking in social graces... it's way past my bed time, I'm tired, I spent all day taking exams but for some reason I'd rather read about bikes online than go to bed... go figure).




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