Well, ladies

I hate admitting this, but I am feeling sorry for myself tonight.

It's difficult adjusting to this new restricted diet. It's hard knowing that I have a disease that could be very serious at some point. I feel bad feeling sorry for myself when so many others are having worse things happen in their lives.

But if I ignore this feeling it won't just go away, so I'm trying to release it by writing it. Maybe it will dissipate?

I ask the question why me? Why is it that there are people who eat fast food, donuts, gravy, gallons of cows milk, artificial sweeteners and drink loads of coffee that don't have this??? I don't do those things. I haven't been perfect, but I have always been careful about what I eat, I have been reading labels for 20 years!!

It's frustrating. Tonight I came home from work with a headache and exhausted. I took my medication, then layed on the couch huddled in a blanket. My cold hands and feet would wake me up with a shiver, then I'd fall asleep again. When I finally woke up I felt like I'd slept a long time but wasn't really rested.

Argh. I'm embarassed to admit that I can be so self-centered and so pathetic. I hope I wake up with a song in my heart and butterflies around my head....

Thanks for listening.

Hugs and butterflies,
~T~