It took me a very long time to agree to meds... I knew I was depressed, but believed I could 'do it on my own'.

After a broken relationship, I sank lower and lower, doing the dance with ideas of suicide, never leaving the house except for work, stopped exercising, etc. Work was a kind of oasis, believe it or not.

Then that changed. A new mgr, a new colleague and over the next year, all went to hell in a handbasket. From Nov 2002 until May 2003 I got more and more depressed. Panic attacks, went down to 108 lbs (I'm 5'7"), slept maybe 2 hrs per week. My therapist cld my doctor... I went to see doctor. 1) Together, they pulled me out of work on disability. 2) I was put on Celexa and sleeping pills.

I have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Disorder... it is doubtful that I will ever be able to return to work in my field or any other. I can't be around people (in person) anymore. This website, up to now, is my 'social' life.

The meds help... therapy helps. And now cyling is helping. My therapist gave me homework... try to go on a group ride. It took me 2 weeks but I went on one today. I'm going to try to go on one each weekend.

I'm thankful for the group here... I don't feel so cut off.

Thanks! Spazz