15 yr old flying alone

[Melalvai]

Just wanted to share because this was exciting for everyone concerned. Fortunately it all went smoothly. That's a really good thing because it was awfully stressful and that's with everything goes as it is supposed to. I know some kids are old hands at flying alone, but we're not so worldly!

I put my daughter on a plane this morning. She's flying to Spanish Immersion Camp at Concordia Language Villages near Bemidji, Minnesota. She's flown a couple times ever in her life. She had a connecting flight in Memphis.

She flew out of the regional airport, which was great because security is easy. There are only 2 flights out of that airport each day. My biggest concern was making the connection in Memphis. She called me and I kept her on the phone until she told me she was looking at her next gate. Then I let her get lunch!

The other concern was in St. Paul, where the camp staff are supposed to meet her. They were right where they said they'd be, at her gate when she disembarked. She's fed & sheltered though homesick!

She gets to do it all over again in two weeks. The staff will make sure she gets on her flight in St. Paul, she'll do the connection in Memphis again, and we'll meet her at the regional airport.

[Tuckervill]

I wish I could go there.

She'll be an old hand at it when she gets back.

Karen

[Crankin]

Ah, my kids flew alone (supervised by flight attendants) when they were 5.
Granted, it was a 30 minute flight from Phoenix to San Diego, to visit grandparents, but they couldn't wait until they were old enough for this!

[Biciclista]

yeah, mine flew at age 7.. Back in those days, it was just not a big deal.

[Crankin]

I would still do the same thing today, at least with my own kids, who could handle it.
I flew by myself lots of times, up and down the east coast in high school. I remember one time, when I was coming back from Boston, to go home to Miami, and we had a very long (hours) weather delay. They gave out free champagne, and readily served me! That, of course, would not happen today.
Don't get me started on how parents don't give their kids enough credit to be able to handle these things. Of course, kids are all different, but the attitude of fear today just doesn't sit well with me.

[Biciclista]

I'm with you, Crankin. My kids took the bus around town as teens and went out to play even while little without me supervising them constantly. I cannot imagine having had to raise them the way it is now. I think I'd still tell them to go out and play.

[NbyNW]

What a milestone, Melalvai, and thanks for sharing!

Between your daughter's flying experience and the Spanish immersion, it's exciting to think of the opportunities that will be open to her!

... I remember flying up to NYC around that age to visit my aunt, and she was able to meet me and my sister at the gate.

[Irulan]

to take it one step further, try it with out the cell phone next time. "I'll pick you up at baggage claim, or out front". I would think a 15 year old who can go off to camp by herself can find her way around an airport by reading signs or asking directions. Think of what a confidence builder that is, as compared to keeping Mom on the line the whole time. It is amazing to to see what they can do on their own, with out a parent hovering to make sure nothing goes wrong.

I'm with crankin here.... my jaw just about dropped when I read " She called me and I kept her on the phone until she told me she was looking at her next gate." Life is not always going to have someone to hold your hand via cell phone, and at 15.....she should be encouraged to have the brain power to figure some of these adult-like things out on her own. Just my two cents of course: I think it's important for teens to have opportunities to figure things out on their own, have some responsibility, etc. ( and yes, I have now-adult kids, I'm not just spouting philosophy. I've BTDT)

[Deborajen]

Sounds like she's doing great, Melalvai! First time is always a little nervous. And there really are full-grown family-raising adults that can't even handle traveling and airports and flying, so concern is o.k. You won't have to worry about your daughter becoming one of those adults.

I flew to Texas by myself to visit my cousins when I was 9. Had a connecting flight in Denver where I had another aunt and uncle and they came out and had a donut with me between flights. Everything went o.k., and I felt so "grown up."

Your daughter will have some great memories, and you'll feel so much better as she grows up that she's had a few experiences like this.

[tulip]

Wow, I was flying with my younger brother when I was 6 years old (with airline staff escorting from gate to gate, until I was about 12 or so)...but everyone is different. I agree with Irulan to perhaps consider letting her navigate herself through the airport on the way back. Just an idea; not my kid, I get that everyone has their own style. My own brother (who flew only with me starting when he was 4) just this year sent his kid to overnight camp--at age 11! His daughter at 13 still hasn't been to overnight camp. I was going to overnight camp at age 7 and loving it.

I hope your daughter has a great time. Perhaps she can go to Spanish immersion camp in Spain/Latin America next year, for a month at least, living with a local family...that's the best way to learn the language and culture, and having a good base beforehand makes it much more enjoyable.

[Irulan]

Wow, I was flying with my younger brother when I was 6 years old (with airline staff escorting from gate to gate, until I was about 12 or so)...but everyone is different. I agree with Irulan to perhaps consider letting her navigate herself through the airport on the way back. Just an idea; not my kid, I get that everyone has their own style. My own brother (who flew only with me starting when he was 4) just this year sent his kid to overnight camp--at age 11! His daughter at 13 still hasn't been to overnight camp. I was going to overnight camp at age 7 and loving it.

I hope your daughter has a great time. Perhaps she can go to Spanish immersion camp in Spain/Latin America next year, for a month at least, living with a local family...that's the best way to learn the language and culture, and having a good base beforehand makes it much more enjoyable.

Also, travelling like that can be very empowering, as in "wow I made it through the Mexico City airport solo!!"

[Crankin]

Yep, my kids went to overnight camp at ages 8/10. They went together. When I grew up, I was the only one who didn't go (my family rented a beach house) to camp. I always felt on the outside when everyone else talked about their summer camp experiences. I wish I had gone to language immersion camp!
A funny experience to relate: When I first moved back to the Boston area, my kids were 5 and almost 8. I took them into town on the commuter rail and trolley, and I remember walking across the Boston Common and saying, "OK, we'll take this other trolley station back to the rail line." My kids asked me in awe how I knew where to go. I replied that I had been doing this when I was 11 and you don't lose your memory for where the stops are!
My older son started taking the train into Boston, with friends when he was about 14 or 15. It was "shocking" to some of his friend's parents that I let him do this. Since he had been using public transportation with me since he was little, it was no big deal. His fiancee told me she rode the city bus to school when she was 7, and even had responsibility for younger kids on the bus when she was 8 or 9.
And I don't buy that "things are different today."

[Deborajen]

But things are different. When I was growing up, nobody registered for the draft. Being in the military didn't involve anywhere near the likelihood of being sent into a war situation. 9/11 hadn't happened.-- Lots of differences.

Yes, some people have gone overly nuts trying to protect their kids, but things definitely are different now. In some ways, I was more cautious in raising my son than my parents were in raising me. In other ways, I was more lax. I've always worked full-time and had to trust daycare and babysitters more than my mom did.

Some kids are very unsupervised nowadays, too. Not to disagree entirely with the overprotectiveness comments, and nothing personal against anyone who actually teaches their kids by giving them some well-planned extra space to learn on their own, but don't get me started on the kids who take care of themselves too much. I'd rather see a parent worry a little too much.

[Irulan]

But things are different. When I was growing up, nobody registered for the draft. Being in the military didn't involve anywhere near the likelihood of being sent into a war situation. 9/11 hadn't happened.-- Lots of differences.

Registering for the selective service is mandatory now since 1980; it didn't used to be but that law was changed way before 9/11 - in 1980 under the Carter administration. So that's apples to oranges. Afghanistan, Gulf War, etc.... war situations are nothing new.

[Crankin]

Well, when I was young everyone faced a risk of being sent to war... the day the lottery was held for being sent to Viet Nam was not a good one. But, this is off topic and I am not a good person to discuss this with. For despite my anti-war views, one of my kids enlisted and is a Marine. See, you can't protect your kids! I wanted my kids to be strong and independent and that's just what happened. And there are many people who see the military just as one would see any viable career.
As a former teacher, I saw my share of kids whose needs weren't met. But, you know, this happened when I was a kid, too. It was just hidden. We had alcoholic parents, abusers, lots of moms popping pills, and I remember one dad who suddenly "disappeared" because of some funny business with his teenage daughter. And I grew up in a very nice upper middle class suburb. Yet, we were all supposed to be perfect families. My DH endured horrible verbal and physical abuse growing up. He couldn't focus in school and didn't achieve his potential until long after he left home... yet no one ever thought there was a reason for his behavior, because they didn't see the big picture. My mantra is "there is always a reason for behavior."
There's a difference between kids not having basic attachment, good parenting, or unsafe living conditions and giving your kids freedom. And most of the time, I found that there are often very good reasons for parents acting this way... poverty, substance abuse, spousal abuse, or just plain ignorance about good parenting.
Bad things have happened in history throughout time. You can't let that affect the way you live your life.