I shouldn't have said it but....

[kenyonchris]

You guys will like it. Keep in mind that at work, on the radio, we are supposed to stay brief and professional...people have police ban radios and are listening. And the chief listens. On mids we can get away with more. I tend to be the shift clown (they guys have another word for me)....remember the cow thing?

Anyway, I was waiting on a wrecker to come get the truck of a guy I had just arrested. He was in the back seat, handcuffed. I was just sitting there, typing on my MDT (my in car computer) with other officers. Dispatch comes on to dispatch out a "general call"....meaning it is not going to one particular officer, but to whomever might be in the area. Generally reckless drivers.

Dispatch: "All Keller units, we have a report of"
silence
Dispatch: "A reckless bicylist."
silence
Dispatch...trying not to giggle (weird for dispatch, they are a solemn lot): "Keller units, complainant said that when she backed out and hit the bicylist he retaliated by shaking his fists at her and banging on her trunk. She wants an officer to find him and tell him that that is not acceptable behavior."

Long pause (usually anyone in the area responds that they are in the area or whatever) finally, an officer chirps up (I can't leave my post so I'm out on this), "Keller, 314 enroute."

A short time later, 314 checks that he is in the area and asks a question that we often ask, because many times the caller follows a reckless vehicle so as to advise on direction until we get there, "Keller, is the...uh...bicylist still being followed?"

Dispatch: "No, the complainant is in the parking lot at 200 main. She no longer sees the bicycle."

Me (unable to keep my silence): "314 this is 312."

Him: "Go ahead?"

Me: "I think that bicycle is gone with the Schwinn."

Silence. Silence. Finally a strangled: "10-4" from him.

Of course, since I had a suspect in my car, my recorder was going. It recorded me giggling to myself in my own dang car. And I charged the guy with fail to ID fugitive, so the tape will go to the DA. So the whole event will be heard again.

He spent some time explaining to the lady that if she backed into him, she might expect some signs of irritation from the cyclist.

[jesvetmed]

Some people! What are they thinking?!

[wannaduacentury]

You guys will like it. Keep in mind that at work, on the radio, we are supposed to stay brief and professional...people have police ban radios and are listening. And the chief listens. On mids we can get away with more. I tend to be the shift clown (they guys have another word for me)....remember the cow thing?

Anyway, I was waiting on a wrecker to come get the truck of a guy I had just arrested. He was in the back seat, handcuffed. I was just sitting there, typing on my MDT (my in car computer) with other officers. Dispatch comes on to dispatch out a "general call"....meaning it is not going to one particular officer, but to whomever might be in the area. Generally reckless drivers.

Dispatch: "All Keller units, we have a report of"
silence
Dispatch: "A reckless bicylist."
silence
Dispatch...trying not to giggle (weird for dispatch, they are a solemn lot): "Keller units, complainant said that when she backed out and hit the bicylist he retaliated by shaking his fists at her and banging on her trunk. She wants an officer to find him and tell him that that is not acceptable behavior."

Long pause (usually anyone in the area responds that they are in the area or whatever) finally, an officer chirps up (I can't leave my post so I'm out on this), "Keller, 314 enroute."

A short time later, 314 checks that he is in the area and asks a question that we often ask, because many times the caller follows a reckless vehicle so as to advise on direction until we get there, "Keller, is the...uh...bicylist still being followed?"

Dispatch: "No, the complainant is in the parking lot at 200 main. She no longer sees the bicycle."

Me (unable to keep my silence): "314 this is 312."

Him: "Go ahead?"

Me: "I think that bicycle is gone with the Schwinn."

Silence. Silence. Finally a strangled: "10-4" from him.

Of course, since I had a suspect in my car, my recorder was going. It recorded me giggling to myself in my own dang car. And I charged the guy with fail to ID fugitive, so the tape will go to the DA. So the whole event will be heard again.

He spent some time explaining to the lady that if she backed into him, she might expect some signs of irritation from the cyclist.

She backed into him and he's supposed to just stand there? Good for him. She needs a citation for reckless driving. I like your stories. Jenn

[Biciclista]

did the lady who backed into the cyclist get a ticket?
it's a great story.

[Flatlander]

"...gone with the Schwinn."

[kenyonchris]

did the lady who backed into the cyclist get a ticket?
it's a great story.

I doubt it, for two reasons...one, the cyclist was not there to file the complaint, and two, an officer did not observe it....one or the other has to happen. Had the cyclist been there to give a statement, she would have. The officer who responded said she was an idiot.
Personally, I would have written it.... ("Here speak into the little black box...you say you backed out and HIT the cyclist on a roadway where he had right of way?") and let it go to court, where I would have lost, and taken the reprimand for writing a ticket that had no complainant information....even if I had had his number or way to contact him....which we didn't, because SHE called.

[TrekTheKaty]

She said, "herd." Sorry, still laughing over the cow You guys must stay up nights thinking this stuff up!

I wish I could have reached a lady's trunk today! Go ahead. Call the police. I'll wait

[OakLeaf]

"Admission by party-opponent...."

[LoriO]

I think I have a clone of you working the midnight shift at my PD. You just never know what he is going to say next on the radio. The dispatchers from the neighboring town admit to eavesdropping on our frequency just so they can hear what the next gem Gary is going to come up with.

A couple of weeks ago we were looking for 2 teens that stole a motor scooter. Gary was checking the woodline when we stated he had movement and that they appear to be running from him. A couple seconds later he comes back on the air and states " Nope not them, just a couple of deer." a short pause and then he adds " I think I just filled my pants" and then. another couple of seconds later "I think I need to change my Depends"

I was laughing so hard all I could do was key the mike and barely squeek out a 10-4.

[Pan Dulce]

When I worked in the county jail, one of my favorite parts of the job was being on the radio. I'd be a smart a** sometimes, as would a good percentage of my coworkers. We'd have to watch who was around, though, or we'd get a stern talking to.

Man, I miss working there.. I'm enjoying your stories.

[kenyonchris]

I think I have a clone of you working the midnight shift at my PD. You just never know what he is going to say next on the radio. The dispatchers from the neighboring town admit to eavesdropping on our frequency just so they can hear what the next gem Gary is going to come up with.

A couple of weeks ago we were looking for 2 teens that stole a motor scooter. Gary was checking the woodline when we stated he had movement and that they appear to be running from him. A couple seconds later he comes back on the air and states " Nope not them, just a couple of deer." a short pause and then he adds " I think I just filled my pants" and then. another couple of seconds later "I think I need to change my Depends"

I was laughing so hard all I could do was key the mike and barely squeek out a 10-4.

WOW!! I would never say that, I would be written up for sure. They shake their heads at my puns and sometimes random comments, "I'll be clear false alarm, the neighbors were attending to a turtle emergency"....and the like, but no filling of the pants or depends.....it would be too much....and not tolerated. Gone with the Schwinn is ok, Depends jokes no.
But, of course, it all depends what is going on. There was no radio traffic going on when I piped up about Gone with the Schwinn, otherwise even that would not have flown.

[Ann G]

Darn, it must have been pretty irritating for him to be in the way when she wanted to back out. Shame on him. Pretty good stuff.