Reminders- age but different life choices

[shootingstar]

Chatted up with another employee about our holiday weekend (which is now) and our family get-togethers. She is a youngish employee married with 2 young kids, but I think she's tired of having her family live with them (her divorced parents. 2 siblings). She looks forward to some members having their own place which will happen.

I also found out her mother was.....53.

I kept my mouth shut: I am 53. I don't offer up my age to people at work. I just spread rumours I'm over mid-40's or past half a century.

However those at work, I know who will retire in the next 2-5 yrs., mention their age freely.

[roadie gal]

I'm also 53. I'm constantly amazed when I find out co-workers parents are my age. I don't know why but it seems that parents should be older than me!

[tealtreak]

it all depends when you have kids (and how many lol)...I am 51 but since my surprise baby is only in 7th grade.....I encounter Grandparents at her school functions that are not much older than I am (:

[Catrin]

I turn 53 in two weeks, and I am far more comfortable mentioning my age these days than I once was. It seems as I "age backwards" and have become extremely active that the number no longer really matters much to me. I agree it feels odd when you run across someone your age who has made much different life choices.

[indysteel]

I have a friend who had her first child at age 39 and another at 41. She doesn't look old for her age. She is probably 20-30 pounds overweight, but that's neither here nor there as far as it making her look older. On more than one occasion, she's been mistaken for their grandmother. As you might imagine, it really bums her out.

I have to admit to feeling somewhat conscious of my age relative to others, in part, because I'm married to someone much younger than. With him, I don't feel the difference all that much. With his friends, I do for sure. We've had reason to see a big group of them lately. Sometimes, I take comfort in being older and, in some ways, wiser and more experienced. I'm arguably in better shape than many of them, too, physically and financially, which soothes my ego when I've feeling "old." We have no intention of having kids, so that creates a disconnect on some level, especially among my husband's friends' spouses. I'm used to that with my own friends though, too. But my friends with kids are old enough at this point to see the green grass on both sides of that equation. So, we usually don't struggle to find a good middle ground.

[shootingstar]

Guess, it depends how one handles stress of parenting and one's personality temperment. Generally speaking I do notice those who try to be more physically active for several years before and after pregnancy, it seems to help them, as well as for the long term. Frankly I'm just impressed by the level energy required to be a parent for more than 1 young child especially as one ages.

What is the age gap betwee you and SO, indy?
Mine is 16 yrs....but he tends to hang around fairly active (cycling) folks around his age. So I genuinely have a warped sense of what 69 looks like. He has 2 young grandchildren.

The only thing that I even share remotely with any 53 yr. grandmother, is that my eldest niece is 26 yrs. old. (From a sister 1 yr. younger than I.) She is the eldest of the whole bunch of nieces and nephews..with the youngest nearly 3 yrs. old. My youngest sister had her first child at 40.

It is a large age range, but kind of neat to see of them interact among one another, within 1 generation.

[Crankin]

Well, I had my first child 3 weeks before I turned 29, which was 30 years ago today! Temporarily feeling old.
I thought 29 was about average to have a kid; I mean I had a house, a good job, and a master's degree along with a husband. All of my mom friends in Az were my age, except one. Then when I moved here, I was usually the youngest mom. Everyone here waits until at least 35 or 40.
Personally, I am glad I am free now. My friend from college, who is a year younger than me is a 2 time grandmother and her kids are the same age as mine.

[indysteel]

My boss turned 67 in August and just sent his youngest to college last month. He married his second wife when he was in his mid-40s and she was in her mid-30s. The second of their two children was a bit of a surprise. On some level, I think that child has kept him more active than he might have otherwise been, but on another, I think the stress of dealing with a teenager when he might have otherwise been an empty nester has taken a toll on him.