How the other half lives . . .

[limewave]

We live in a small cape-cod home built in the 1960's. There's one bathroom for all of us. One living room. 2 bedrooms.

Over the last year I've had friends building a house about 2 miles from us. The house is nearly completed and they have moved in. We went for a quick visit earlier this week and this afternoon I'm taking the kids there for a swim.

My kids were BLOWN away by the home. DD thinks it's actually Cinderella's castle as every single room (including the bathrooms) have crystal chandeliers. There are 4 suites: The master suite which includes bedroom, bathroom, dressing room, walk-in closet for him and her. A Paris-themed and Lakeshore-themed suite that both include a master bedroom with walk-in closet, bathroom, and 2 children rooms with their own bathrooms. The last one is more of an apartment that has 2 bedrooms (each with their own bathroom) living area and a separate kitchen.

The pool has lighted fountains and a waterfall. There is a shooting range in the backyard. Outdoor kitchen. Of course all of this sits on the lake front. I haven't had the full tour yet, but I'm sure I'll get one this afternoon!

After our first visit, I spent the rest of the night scrubbing our floors and vacuuming the drapes. I love our little home, but wowzers!

Seriously, what do you get them for a housewarming gift? I really want to welcome them to the neighborhood, but everything I can think of to give them seems podunky.

[beccaB]

I live in a tiny house too..5 people, a few of them teenagers! One bathroom. A not so well liked thinker once said, "That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger"
As for a housewarming gift, how about a fine wine and gourmet food basket? People can always use consumables.

[indysteel]

Yeah; I have the same reaction when I visit my best friend at her 7,000 square foot home that she shares with her husband (no kids or pets). They have a pool and tennis court. They bought it about the same time that DH and I bought our much more modest (but still really nice to us) home. She lives in an affluent suburb while the town I live, well, not affluent. It's a bit of culture shock.

As for a housewarming gift, I'd go with a bottle of wine and something homemade, like cookies,....or nothing. Honestly, I only got a handful of housewarming gifts when I bought my first house. With my second (the one I got with DH just before we married), I got nothing. I'm not entirely sure they're the norm anymore.

[tulip]

Bake them homemade bread. I like the sound of your house better.

[Biciclista]

I'd give them some of those super cleaning pads to keep those chandeliers clean (I wouldn't give them a housewarming gift, really). I like your house better too. My house is a lot like yours except we have the good fortune of two bathrooms. smaller houses cost less to heat for one thing!

[indysteel]

smaller houses cost less to heat for one thing!

Seriously. My friend mentioned once how worried she is about plumbing issues because they have SIX bathrooms/halfbaths. Why they bought a house that large for just the two of them is beyond me. When she first told me they were buying it, I have to admit that I reacted somewhat negatively. She interpreted it as envy, but my feelings were and remain far more complicated than that.

[ny biker]

Well, I had a friend in college whose family had a huge, expensive house on a giant parcel of land. He once described his father as a ball of hate.

Happy homes come in all shapes and sizes.

[Catrin]

... When she first told me they were buying it, I have to admit that I reacted somewhat negatively. She interpreted it as envy, but my feelings were and remain far more complicated than that.

Why would 2 people need all of that? I can understand wanting something nice, but really, 6 bathrooms for one married couple? Do they perhaps envision having one of their parents eventually moving in or something? It sounds like a great... multi-generational home (for lack of a better term). Perhaps this is just my own background showing, I just think all of that would be so hard/expensive to maintain properly.

I've only seen your house once, but I liked it

[jessmarimba]

Can you give them a gift card to a neighborhood cafe or something? To me that seems less like giving them money and/or something they don't need and more suggesting the more charming aspects of where they'll live in a way that pretty much forces them to experience it.

(And trust me, I'd probably find your 1960s cape cod more appealing than their place...new houses just don't have any personality!)

[limewave]

(And trust me, I'd probably find your 1960s cape cod more appealing than their place...new houses just don't have any personality!)

Normally I don't care for new houses either but they actually did a lot of architectural detail in this home, it is stunning.

So I'm thinking about getting them a gift basket from the "Cheese Lady." It's a small local business and she has the BEST cheese. My favorite thing is to get fresh goat cheese, roasted tomatoes in olive oil, and flat bread (all at her store) to make home made pizzas. It's super yummy and decadent (and within my budget).

[shootingstar]

Housewarming gift: If they like it, a huge year round wreath to hang on a door. Neat if your kids could help you make it...but nah, alot of work right?

Homemade food is always nice. Or a big basket of tropical fruit --something different with interesting snacks.

A home with too many bathrooms, means too much work for me. That includes a big front lawn and long walkway.

[7rider]

Seriously, what do you get them for a housewarming gift?.

A gift credit to the local power company so they can keep the fountain lights on and water bubbling???

I find we tend to expand to fill the space we're in. We have a 3 BR, 2.5 Ba house. 5 years ago, the spare bedrooms were empty. Today? Um, less so!

But our house - which is by no means large - is as big a house as I would ever want (but I do want a deck and another garage). I hate to clean the house we have now. Can't imagine cleaning anything bigger.

[indysteel]

A gift credit to the local power company so they can keep the fountain lights on and water bubbling???

I find we tend to expand to fill the space we're in. We have a 3 BR, 2.5 Ba house. 5 years ago, the spare bedrooms were empty. Today? Um, less so!

But our house - which is by no means large - is as big a house as I would ever want (but I do want a deck and another garage). I hate to clean the house we have now. Can't imagine cleaning anything bigger.

I'll trade you a deck for a second bathroom. A groundhog has made a home under our deck. We have to remove part of the deck to get to him and backfill the chambers. Ugh. The city park is our neighbor, so we get lots of critters.

Actually, we have a second bathroom on our second floor, but it only has a tub. I'm not a fan of baths. And both bathrooms are the size of a coat closet. Thankfully, DH and I have worked out a morning routine that avoids conflict. It also gives us time to spend with the cats in the morning. They're not allowed upstairs, so I'd just as soon get ready downstairs anyway. The biggest drawback is our guests end up using the same bathroom that gets all the heavy use (and all my dark hair). I'd rather have a guest bathroom or half-bath that isn't used much so that I don't rush to clean it every time somebody stops by.

At the risk of making anybody feel bad for wanting or having a larger home, I just don't get the need for more, more, more. My coworker and her husband bought a house 3 years ago that was bigger than their previous home. They lived in that house all of 2 years before they decided they had to have an even bigger house. When I asked why, she said she wanted a bigger....wait for it....laundry room.

Really? You're going through the hassle and expense of buying a 4,000 square foot home for just the two of you because you want a bigger room to clean your clothes? That's nuts. I hate moving and buying/selling homes so much that there has to be a pretty good reason before I'll put myself through that kind of stress.

[Irulan]

Happy homes come in all shapes and sizes.

Thank you.

wow as someone who is househunting for an upgrade, all the negativity is a little.... um, whatever. Everyone has their reasons for bigger/smaller, fancier/simpler and just because it's not for you doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I can totally see being stumped about a housewarming present but why such a quick leap to judgement on people's housing?

I mean, so what if she wants a bigger laundry room. It's her house.

Not everyone who is affluent is full of hate or a social climber. Some people work darn hard for what they have and if they choose to put it into a big house instead of something else, so what? I swear, the manner in which some things go, in lightspeed fashion, to negative judgement is downright unfriendly.

We are in the process of looking for a new house that will meet our needs better, and yes, it is probably going to be a little bigger and a lot nicer. I guess I won't be talking about it here.

[indysteel]

Thank you.

wow as someone who is househunting for an upgrade, all the negativity is a little.... um, whatever. Everyone has their reasons for bigger/smaller, fancier/simpler and just because it's not for you doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I can totally see being stumped about a housewarming present but why such a quick leap to judgement on people's housing?

I mean, so what if she wants a bigger laundry room. It's her house.

Not everyone who is affluent is full of hate or a social climber. Some people work darn hard for what they have and if they choose to put it into a big house instead of something else, so what? I swear, the manner in which some things go, in lightspeed fashion, to negative judgement is downright unfriendly.

We are in the process of looking for a new house that will meet our needs better, and yes, it is probably going to be a little bigger and a lot nicer. I guess I won't be talking about it here.

I don't have a problem with everyone who purchases a bigger/nicer home, but I do bristle at the people in my life who are on a fairly constant quest--and I am generally capable of perceiving the difference--for more stuff or for stuff that goes far beyond meeting their needs or is outside their means. They're never satisfied, and I find it sad for a number of reasons. With both instances I referred to in my posts, there is much to the story than just their housebuying that leads me to my conclusions about them.

But that said, you're right in that I painted with much broader strokes than I intended, and I'm sorry to have come of as that judgmental. My current home is bigger than my first (which isn't difficult since it was 900 sq. feet); so it's not that I totally reject the idea of upgrading.