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Thread: moral dilemma

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    1,333

    moral dilemma

    today is the deadline to apply for a job at another municipality that I would be a strong candidate for. It would require me to commute (by car) for about 40 -60 minutes a day, my vacation would go down to 3 weeks (from 7), but I would be making close to $20K more a year.

    A co-worker of mine is desperate for that job, as it is close to her home and she just really wants to get out of here.

    I will admit I'm not as enthusiastic about the job as her, but I also think it would be silly for me NOT to apply. But, with the cons I've listed above, as well as my friend fearing she won't get it if I apply, I'm wondering if it would be best to not apply? not sure. I suppose I can apply and turn it down after the interview process or even before. My friend's afraid that I'll take her spot and she won't even be interviewed.

    thoughts?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    San Francisco Bay Area
    Posts
    9,324
    7 weeks of vacation time is awesome! I would stay put for that. The extra 20K would not make up for the loss of 4 weeks of vacation in my mind.

    Plus, who wants to commute so far. Yeah, you'd have more money, but you'd lose even more time daily with the commute.

    Veronica
    Discipline is remembering what you want.


    TandemHearts.com

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Central Indiana
    Posts
    6,034
    Leave your friend out of your decision. Do you want this job? If the answer is a yes or maybe, then apply for it. If it's answer is no, then don't. While it is very nice of you to care about your friend's feelings, they should not prevent you from applying for the job. I actually question the professionalism of someone who would use friendship to discourage someone from pursuing a career advancement. That's simply not fair to you.

    Let the best/right person win. But that's for the employer to decide; not your friend.

    That said, I think you need to think hard about whether you're truly interested in the job in the first place. My own relative lack of vacation time and long commute add greatly to my stress levels at work. In my mind, those are pretty big cons, but then again, I don't know much about your financial situation and how needed that $20k is.
    Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.

    --Mary Anne Radmacher

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Cincinnati, Ohio
    Posts
    778
    That extra four weeks off would be huge deal. I get four weeks total now, and when I change jobs, starting next week, I'll get only three weeks. In my case the pay bump is about 11k, plus and health care is fully paid for by my new employer, which saves me about 2k a year. Net change of 13k before taxes (yes, I'd be moving to a new tax bracket) and enough to make me make the move. More then the cash is my displeasure with my future growth and opportunities here. Yea, there is flexible work schedule here and if I needed to take an afternoon off and work from home, I could, so that is another thing I've given up for of a better job long term.

    It really depends on how much you want to take this other job (out from your current position) and what taking this job should you apply for it would mean to your friendship. Would she do the same for you? 20k pay increase would be HUGE for me, but it's yourself you have to answer to, so in the end only you can answer the question.

    Shannon
    Starbucks.. did someone say Starbucks?!?!
    http://www.cincylights.com

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Beautiful NW or Left Coast
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    5,619
    not only would you be giving up all that vacation, but your quality of life would go DOWN because of the commute. It's only money. Tell your friend and go ride your bike.
    I like Bikes - Mimi
    Watercolor Blog

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  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    Erin, Ontario
    Posts
    188
    How will you feel if you don't apply and she doesn't get interviewed? Will you think "Darn I should have applied?"

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    1,333
    thanks ladies!

    I would never commute that long for very long. I would rent my place out and find one closer to work. But then that would mean either I pay rent, or pay two municipal taxes if I buy another place.

    In the end I decided not to, because the biggest question mark that I couldn't answer was this position was filled a year ago and the encumbent quit less than a year into her job. Why?? At least with this place I know all the ins and outs of the political BS whereas I'd have to learn theirs. And the lack of vacation time really is detrimental to my overall mental health.

    Another thing that made me decide against was if my friend gets this job, HER position will come up and I've done it before so I *should* (nothing guaranteed, of course!) get it. It'll be quite a big pay jump, though not as much as the one I passed on.

    20K in the overall scheme of things isn't so much when you factor different things.

    edit: I was writing this with people talking at me, so I had some strange grammatical errors!
    Last edited by badger; 01-26-2011 at 08:04 PM.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Land of 1,000 Bicycles
    Posts
    581
    Sounds like a good decision. 7 weeks of vacation, daaayaaam!
    2001 Cannondale R500 <3
    2011 Specialized Ruby Elite Apex
    2021 Tangential Speedarama

 

 

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