Need to vent...

[Roadtrip]

Ok. In short it's been some time since I've been happy in my job. Yes, the economy has been rough on everyone. At least I have a job, but I am really tired, fustrated and exhausted.

About a six months after I was hired the CEO was essentially fired and a huge shakeup of uppper managment happened. They fired about 80 employees and they split the department and hired a new VP to run the technical side of our business. Many of the developers and middle mgnt on staff didn't mesh with the new VP and left the company within six months, which dessimanted the department. Myself and one other dev were left of a staff of about eight-- I took on MUCH more work and responsibility-- but salary freeze basically meant I went two years without a raise.

New director of development was hired and started to rebuild and I felt like I was valued and had a chance to learn and grow with new team. VP was fired after a cluster-f%@& of a year where a website that was supposed to make the company $$$$ and ended up a huge failure.

CEO brought in "his" guy as VP who began making changes and slowly cutting director out of decision making and moving in different direction from a technical standpoint-- away from the skill set of the majority of the staff. Director resigned and within six months the team was dessemated again.

VP and new director are located in another state, two time zones away, so there is a huge lack in "team work" and any potential of training or advancement of career seems like a pipe dream. I'm the only developer left in my office. Not exactly feeling appreciated or very fulfilled right now. I keep plugging away and doing my job.

I've been looking for another job opportunity pretty hard for the last six months or so and had several interviews. Most recently I've interviewed three times with a small company and was asked to take this "interesting" personality assessment, finally was asked to take a technical exam today. I was nervous and the tech is not what I'm used to using, but have some exposure to, plus I was totally honest about my skills. Test went horrible and I feel like after all this I blew this chance after all I've done. I just cant help but feel demoralized and a failure.

Sorry this is such a long rant. It's been two years plus in the making and seeing everyone around me finding new and better opportunities just has me feeling pretty depressed.

I'm doing what I can and changing the things in my life that I can change, like climbing on the bike for the first time, making that personal commitment to myself. I just wish the job situation would look up.

Shannon

[jessmarimba]

Yeah...moving to Denver dead-ended my current job. Everyone who was hired within the year after they hired me were all recently promoted at our central office.

But at least you're looking. And you've had interviews. And who knows, maybe you didn't do as bad on that tech exam as you thought? Sometimes there's a weird way of grading those types of things, and sometimes they factor in a lot less than you'd expect! You aren't a failure! You're actively working to make things better, which puts you much farther ahead than a lot of people. It'll come back and reward you in the end!

Hugs! My mini-office is feeling underappreciated so we're meeting for a bagel breakfast today. I'd invite you if you were here!

[Roadtrip]

OK. Small update on things here. Got a call on Monday from the potential new employer. As expected I didn't do well on the test. What they want to do is provide me with study materials and for me to take a few weeks with the book and software and come back in and take the assessment again.

Everything else seems to be in right where they want it... they just want to see higher score on the technical assessment.

Apparently they like me enough to give me a second crack at the test. I'd also get a considerable bump in pay (10-15k more then I make now), but commute is about an extra 15-20 minutes (daily commute would be about 40 minutes each way) each way, plus the work is a little more fast paced then I've been used to the last few years.

My current employer likes to do sprints from a cold start. So I could go weeks punching the clock and getting routine things done, then a huge project (that upper mgnt has been stewing on for months) suddenly "has" to get done-- yesterday-- so we go to DEFCON 1 in an instant.

Not the best of environments to work under and totally preventable-- with proper planning and project management from top down.

I just wished technical books weren't so dang dry. WOW. This one is sure to have you cured of insomnia in a New York minute.

Shannon

[Thorn]

Hang in there....I know where you're coming from all too well. Subtract a little of your politics and add to your saga a mentally ill owner and you've got my situation. Don't know your age, but at 50 I'm having a heck of a time even getting in the door.

So, while you may see the book learning as a little frustrating, inside I'm doing a major happy dance for you. You see, to me it indicates that there is hope. Go for it. Study hard and good luck.

[emily_in_nc]

Wow, that's really encouraging, roadtrip! In this economy, from everything I hear, there are so many qualified applicants for each open job (I'm also in software development), that if you don't meet every requirement to a "t", you don't stand a chance. The fact that this new company is bending over backwards to help you succeed is huge -- they must really like you and want you there. Good luck learning the dry stuff and acing that exam the next time!

[Bike Writer]

Shannon, this company must really want you. Good luck with the books, study hard and grasp your prize. I hope all goes well for you.