depression

[redrhodie]

My friend is depressed. She wants to get help, but doesn't know where to begin. She has suffered a death of a family member recently, but her main issue seems to be her relationship with her partner. What kind of therapist she should be looking for? She doesn't want to take medication.

Thanks for any advice.

[PamNY]

Does she have a medical doctor who might recommend someone? That can be a good starting point.

[tulip]

She might want to contact a grief support group for starters. It's really worth it to talk to someone, but it can be hard to take that first step, particularly if one is depressed and feeling powerless. Encourage her to start with a grief support group or a women's center.

I had a great therapist that I found on a website that listed Licensed Clinical Social Workers in my area. That might be a good place to start, too.

[rocknrollgirl]

I had to see someone a few years ago for post traumatic stress syndrome after I witnessed a friend killed in an accident. I am a teacher so I asked the
school psychologist to recommend someone.

I agree with the grief group also, great idea.

[NbyNW]

There may also be referral services through her health insurance if she has it. She can call them up and keep it general, just as you said it: grief, strain in a relationship. And then they would provide her with a short list of counselors in her area who also meet her insurance company's criteria for claims & reimbursement.

[Crankin]

All good suggestions. May I add looking at community mental health clinics (usually staffed by LICSWs and LMHCs) or agencies related to religions... Catholic Charities, Jewish Family and Children's Service.
Ask friends, too. Just remember that someone who might be a good therapist for me might not work for someone else at all. It really is all about the relationship.

[channlluv]

Most therapists will give her a brief first meeting, too, to see if they're a good match for each other.

I found that regular exercise really helped me a lot with my depression. I was able to get off medication within a couple of months of regular cycling. I was off the meds for about a year and a half when I was in that car accident in February. Within two weeks of no activity at all, I was having depressive episodes/breakdowns. I had to go back on the meds until I can get my activity level back up, which will be in the next month or so, I hope. (I sprained my wrist and have been unable to get back on the bike for more than eight miles.)

I totally get the no meds thing, but sometimes they do serve a purpose. The difference is pretty significant.

Good luck to her.

Roxy

[bmccasland]

There's having a "blue" day, and depression. Depression, you need professional help. A counselor can help. One doesn't always needs meds. Although looking at "self medication" is important, know that alcohol is a depressive.

Also, try not fall in the trap of negative thought patterns. If you only think of yourself in bad situations, STOP IT!

For your particular friend, grief is a process - that sounds so trite. Try to remember the *Life* of the dear realtive. But if it's too difficult, and a grief support group doesn't help, or a counselor (people have offered many places to find them, even the funeral home would have listings) is the next step. My mother never has completely gotten over the death of my natural father, and it's been over 50 years.

I hope your friend gets the help she needs.