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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    San Diego
    Posts
    1,516

    bare biker butts

    OK... I gotta ask... why, oh why, don't people replace their threadbare shorts? I mean, you're on a $$$ bike riding in shorts that shoulda been replaced 400 miles ago! Don't get me wrong... I like bare biker butts... but I wanna see ALL of it or let me just dream...

    there is something just... wrong about glimpsing patches thru the worn spots...
    There is a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Bendemonium
    Posts
    9,673
    Must be the same reason why someone decided we needed white lycra shorts. Actually make that double
    Frends know gud humors when dey is hear it. ~ Da Crockydiles of ZZE.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    160
    yeah, one of the guys on last night's ride was wearing a very worn out skinsuit...I'm sort of getting used to it. He's the fastest rider in that group, so I sit on his wheel a lot...but I concentrate on the tire.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Concord, CA USA
    Posts
    1,299
    I think no one tells them the shorts are threadbare, since it's not something noticeable until the shorts are on and the rider is leaning forward. I was riding with my roommate a few weeks ago, sitting on his wheel, and when the sun hit his back I could see everything. He threw the shorts away right after the ride.

    Now I'm worried my shorts are threadbare and no one's bothered to tell me...

    So how do you tell someone their butt is showing if you don't know them well?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    North Texas
    Posts
    1,565
    Comment on the clarity of their tattoo
    no regrets!

    My ride: 2003 Specialized Allez Comp - zebra (men's 52cm), Speedplay X5 pedals, Koobi Au Enduro saddle

    Spazzdog Ink Gallery
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  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Just North of Dallas
    Posts
    312
    Heh - KSH and I were on an organized ride not too long ago and we were riding behind an older gentleman who was wearing a pair of cotton boxer/briefs - not bike shorts - the elastic around the top said Jockey - I kid you not!!!!

    You have not seen threadbare until you have seen threadbare UNDERWEAR worn as bike shorts!!! You could see RIGHT through those suckers...I have to wonder if it wasn't on purpose since he had his t-shirt tucked IN!!!!!

    We had to pass the guy or we woulda been laughing so hard we wouldnt have been able to ride!!!!
    The space and time for what you WANT is being occupied by what you have settled for

    "You say bark I say bite / You say shark I say hey man / Jaws was never my scene / And I don't like Star Wars"

    BikeDFW - Dallas and Fort Worth Area Cycling Advocacy Organization

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    Mrs. KnottedYet
    Posts
    9,152

    Cool

    aka_kim "Now I'm worried my shorts are threadbare and no one's bothered to tell me... "

    as someone who will never be fast enough to ride in front of you, your shorts are fine, kim.

    Bikerz was commenting, I call out bumps and signal turns....even though there's no one behind me .... ever.

    "So how do you tell someone their butt is showing if you don't know them well?"

    I like spazz's tattoo idea. Or work it into pre-ride routine; check brakes, inflate tires, would someone check my shorts?
    Fancy Schmancy Custom Road bike ~ Mondonico Futura Legero
    Found on side of the road bike ~ Motobecane Mixte
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    https://www.instagram.com/pugsley_adventuredog/

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Albuquerque, NM
    Posts
    3,099
    since I don't have anyone to tell me - I stretch the shorts over my fist before I wear them to make sure they aren't sheer L'eggs comfort hose (in black) disguised as shorts!
    Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand, strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming: "Yeah Baby! What a Ride!"

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Bendemonium
    Posts
    9,673
    So how do you tell some guy in his baggy mtbike shorts that they're not meant to lift and separate? At least on the road you can pass the guy before you starting snickering. On singletrack you get kind of stuck back there (no pun intended).
    Frends know gud humors when dey is hear it. ~ Da Crockydiles of ZZE.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Portland, Oregon
    Posts
    129

    I feel so cheated!

    First off, I thought this would be a juicy thread with pictures of lovely manly biker butts. Hmph...I'm just a little disgruntled

    Now then, trust me, this is not limited to biking. Used to see this in the gym all the time. I had this problem myself a time or two, as well. I'd bend over in front of the mirror, but indoor lighting doesn't always work.

    Heck, I say just tell them, whether you know them well or not (ok, not the guy you are biking past...at least someone you are biking WITH...and the guy with the underwear...that's just ew....ick....gross.....). Be like, "so, hey...have you checked out the new Pearl Izumi shorts? I'm thinking you haven't looked in a while as it looks like you might need a new pair....say....right NOW."
    I get to have pizza after this, right? No...wait...cheesecake....

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    244
    So funny that this topic came up. On a couple of recent group rides, there's been a guy wearing the same pair of threadbare shorts. It didn't help that it was an old team kit that had a gray panel strategically positioned. I was behind him on one of the rides and I got quite a view, even more so once he started sweating and gray became somewhat see-through anyways. I didn't know him and didn't know how to tell a total stranger that he really needed a new pair of shorts. I asked one of the other guys after the ride. He told me to be blunt -- hey, dude, get some new shorts, we really don't want to watch your butt-crack the whole ride. I didn't get a chance to say it, not sure I would have the guts to be that blunt. I did notice that he had a different pair of shorts on a couple of days ago so he either hasn't done laundry or someone else broke the news to him.
    2004 Colnago Chic - WTB Deva
    2008 Blue RC7 - WTB Deva
    2009 Colnago Master X-lite - WTB Deva

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    1,139
    LMAO! Too funny. Thank God I haven't noticed this yet in any other riders. But if you look at my avatar, you'll see why I REALLY like red shorts, lol. Of course, it's the front view I was interested in
    Dar
    _____________________________________________
    “Minds are like parachutes...they only function when they are open. - Thomas Dewar"

 

 

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