hiya... hope you don't mind me jumping in here...
I wanted to just add one thing... treat buying a bike like you would buying a car... and test ride every brand of bike you can get your hands on that's in your price range... some will just feel more comfortable than others!!! I really, really wanted a Trek Project One but they just did not fit me for some reason...
And definitely try out WSD bikes as well as mens... I ride a mens bike but had them put WSD shifters on for me (they add a plastic piece that shortens the reach to the shifters giving you access to the shifter and brakes!) as well as upgrading to the saddle I wanted... so if you do buy a guys bike ask them to WSD it for you! Good luck with the shopping and training...
There is a fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness".