Ok ladies - so I went out w/ this group of older (40s) women on their regular Monday ride. I have ridden w/ 1 of them a lot (a very strong girl!), and the other 2 (apparently more casual riders) only once or twice before. Well. We went on a route with quite a few little hills which I proceed to spin up. I just can only go so slow with the 53/39. At the tops I would slow up and wait for everyone else and explain that I just had to spin or I would have to walk!
Now, at about mile 20 we turn home and end up going straight into a 15+mph direct headwind. Oh, and its uphill, for like 7 or 8 minutes. Gradual, but deadly with the wind. Oh, and there were semi and gravel trucks passing us and pushing us around on our nice wide shoulder.
3 of us are going along, but we lose one of the more casual ladies. Then my friend, the strongest of all of us, goes back to help pull her up the hill. So I am left hanging onto this girl's wheel - probably 2 or 3 minutes. No signal from her to take my turn up front, but I can tell she's loosing it. So I come around her and am like "I've just gotta go, grab on!" and put my head down and just curse the gods and keep going at our original pace. I just physically couldn't slow down enough to keep her on my wheel (and plus I'm a tiny tiny person so there's not much help anyways)....we both made it up, but I had a good minute on her.
Should I be worried that I've offended these nice ladies? I wasn't attacking, just surviving! What do I do? Should I apologize over email? Ah!! Help!



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But, if so, it's because they had a different expectation and not because of anything overt that you did.
They'll sit at the front and never peel off, and then sit at the food stops and the email lists complaining about "wheelsuckers." Maybe the woman you were on the hill with thought that's what was supposed to happen.
Things like "I didn't really want to drop you, but I just couldn't go that slow", or, "That's okay, sometimes l like to go really slow, so I can work on my technique". Things that to her seem perfectly innocent, but when I'm struggling they sound snarky and belittling. My DH notices the same thing, so it isn't just me. When I'm struggling to keep up, I really don't need to hear that I'm too slow - I already feel bad enough about the struggling. And then it just makes me that much happier (in an evil way insert devil smilie here) on the days when I can put the hurt on her.