My first ever DNF

[Running Mommy]

First things first... THANK YOU from the bottom of my weary heart for your kind words on that last thread. And YES you were the first ones that I wanted to let know what was happening when I pulled the plug.
So here is the long winded version of what happened. YOu may need to make a sandwhich cause this may get long..
First of all the water was great. I came out just a bit ahead of last year. But I'll take any improvement in that department. And both my transistions were MUCH faster than last year. Last year they were each 11 minutes. This year t1 was 9:48 and T2 was a smokin 7:55. I didn't daudle (sp?). Also my bike time was a bit faster, but not at all what I had hoped.
Ok so this is where it all went awry....
On the bike! Remember those winds that I posted so much about last week. Well they were there in full force.
Here is what weather underground had as Tempe's wind yesterday. Now keep in mind that the bike course is out on open land that tends to be windier than alot of other places in the valley. Well actually any open desert areas are prone to wind, so my guess is that the wind was actually alot higher out there.
11:51 AM 77.0 °F WSW 17.3 mph / 27.8 km/h / 7.7 m/s gusts 27.6 mph / 44.4 km/h /
12:51 PM 77.0 °F / 25.0 °C 26.1 °F / WSW 16.1 mph / 25.9 km/h / gusts 29.9 mph / 48.2 km/h /
1:51 PM 77.0 °F / 25.0 °C WSW 18.4 mph / 29.6 km/h / gusts 26.5 mph / 42.6 km/h
2:51 PM 75.9 °F / 24.4 °C 26.1 °F / West 21.9 mph / 35.2 km/h / gusts 28.8 mph / 46.3 km/h /
3:51 PM 75.9 °F / 24.4 °C WSW 20.7 mph / 33.3 km/h /gusts 28.8 mph / 46.3 km/h
4:51 PM 73.0 °F / 22.8 °C 17.1 °F / West 19.6 mph / 31.5 km/h / gusts 25.3 mph / 40.7 km/
5:51 PM 71.1 °F / 21.7 °C West 21.9 mph / 35.2 km/h / gusts 28.8 mph / 46.3 km/h /

So yeah, it was WINDY. Basically it is an out and back loop of around 18 miles each way done three times. On the out I had for the most part a tail wind with some crosswinds. I was cruising these portions at WELL over 16 mph. Sometimes 17-20. But then I hit the turn around..... And it was 10 miles down the beeline hwy with viscious cross/head winds. At times I could go around 14-15 mph, but most 13 and under. And then I would hit the right turn and go straight into a full on head wind. Here I could barely manage over 11, sometimes as low as 7mph. that would last for about a mile then I took a left turn and headed south where I got a break because it was only a cross wind so I could get up to 13 again. But that only lasted for about a half mile. Then I got another right turn right into the head winds again. This stretch is probably around 3-4 miles and it was BRUTAL!!I was only able to average maybe 10 mph through here. And the pavement was HORRIBLE (just to add to the misery). But then I got another half mile break with another left turn. This section also has an overpass, so that kinda sucked. But then again I got another blast by a right turn into the wind to head back to the turn around. And when I hit town I got to go over a bridge twice so I could really feel the crosswinds before heading back out for more fun...
So yeah, I was miserable. I wanted to quit on the first loop, but I willed myself to the second. I wanted to quit again but talked myself into the third loop. The third loop was defintely the worst! Around mile 107 my neck started spasming and I had a hard time holding up my head. It was not so fun...
So then I hit transition and told the guy to take my bike and burn it. These are immortal wordds from my friend Joe Moya from the IMAZ race in 05. That race had equally brutal winds. Oh- and I was dodging tumbleweeds out there- and getting sand blasted by blowing dust..
Ok, so I hit the transition and the girl helps get me out of there pretty quick. I try to start running, and I actually trot for a while. I stopped at the aid station and grabbed some coke and chicken broth which USUALLY settles my stomach. I walked up a hill and realized that my stomach wasn't right. By the time I hit the bridge I had to puke. I made it to a porta pottie and let fly. This became a trend on the run. I couldn't keep anything down and if I tried to run it only made it worse. Imagine trying to run a marathon with a stomach bug. That was me. So I told myself that if I made the first loop by 7:30 I would go on. Once again I knew this would be a midnight affair. I made the first loop and wanted to have the second one down by 9:30. I knew that anything over 9:45 and I wouldn't make it. Well I had to stop and puke a few more times, so I didn't make it. I didn't go over the timing mat to start the third loop, but I would have hit it at 9:50. I was walking a 2:20 loop, and I only had 2:10 to complete the last loop. So I consulted with Tony and our friend Kevin who was out to video tape the race, and I pulled off the course. It was SUCH a bummer! I think it was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. As I said in my title I've never DNF'ed before, and I thought I never would.
But I think the wind just got to me and I got behind on my nutrition. That is all I can figure.
When I got home I continued to heave, and I started shaking uncontrollably. Tony says I was white as a ghost under my sunburn and my lips were a combo of white and purple. I took a hot shower and curled up in bed. But sleep didn't come. I laid there thinking "what if"... But I know I made the right decision, and yeah I WILL be back. Next year? I dunno, but maybe in 09. I need to work on my swim. If I had cut even 15 minutes off my swim that would have given me enough in the bank to finish.. So yeah, I have things to work on.
Well, thanks again for all the well wishes. You guys ROCK!!
Denise

Oh one last thing. As I said before, I had people stopping me left and right this week asking me if I was Denise from the You Tube video. It was cool. Well yesterday a girl came and found be at the bike racks and told me that I inspired her. This was her first, and she looked at my times and she knew that she could do it too.
And then on the run (err walk) I had a guy ask me if I was the one with the video. He told me that he LOVED the video and watched it a ton of times to get him ready for the race. He also said that it changed his buddies perception of the race and he was out there racing too!
So I guess something good has come from all of this!

[KnottedYet]

((((((RunningMommy))))))

I'm so proud of you for fighting those winds! Jeeez Louise!!

[Bluetree]

{{{{{{ DENISE }}}}}

Denise, your report brought tears to my eyes.. not sad ones for your DNF, but happy, awed, inspired ones for your grit and courage. Don't feel bad... those winds were a spot of bad luck and the mere fact that you suited up and gave it your all is a testament to your Iron-ness!

[tprevost]

(((Denise)))

I am so proud of you! I know it was so hard to make that decision, but it was the right one... part of the trick is knowing when your body has had enough. You are awesome and I am one of your biggest fans!!!!

Excellent report, I can't even imagine how tough it was out there!

Trac'

[Pax]

Congrats for giving it your best go AND listening to your body!

[mimitabby]

wow, when your body says no, it MEANS no!

you are one tough gal.
next time you'll be better.

I like how you combined vicious and viscous, both terms to describe the wind!

[KSH]

Dang, that sounds like a miserable day. I can honestly tell you, that there is no way I could have taken that wind for 112 miles. It's amazing that you made those miles Denise. Wind... beats you up... you can't SEE when it ends (like you can a hill!) and for me... it gets INTO my head and starts getting me down.

To stand up to 112 miles of wind like that... makes you one tough lady.

As for the DNF, I think RnR said it best yesterday:

I am a competitive racer. I want to do well. But race day is fraught with things that are completely out of your control, and the day often times does not go as planned.

You need to stay focused on that goal...BUTwhen you really get down to the core of it, it is monumentally important not too forget to look back along the way, and see how far you have come.

That is what this part of the journey should be about. Who am I as an athlete?

Denise, you can look back on your journey and you KNOW what kind of athlete you are. All of your training up until the race was amazing... and you were spot on.

Race day didn't go as planned... and your stomach didn't agree with what was going on. I'm sure deciding to leave the course was the hardest decision ever. But you made a wise one. And... you had nothing to prove. You know you could do it... if you weren't puking every few feet... right?

I knew something wasn't right on your run after your first loop and you running a 15.5 minute mile. That's not the Denise we know from training. Obviously things were going wrong.

You are an Ironman Denise. You were iron-strong to compete as long as you did yesterday! You finished last year and you will finish again another year. And we will be right there cheering you on!

[colby]

What terrible conditions. Mother nature was definitely not on the Iron side last week -- it seems she was testing more than just your training. Given how bad you said you looked when you got home, it's probably a VERY good thing you stopped when you did. That last 8 miles could have put you in a much more dangerous place.

Lessons were learned, and hey, you're famous now! Congratulations on a HARD race. Get some rest!!!

[knapplaura]

Denise,
First, so glad to meet you on Friday night. You have such a great attitude towards training and racing. Second, don't beat yourself up for your decision...sometimes you have to live to fight another day. The IM is not goind anywhere.

For me, it was a really tough day too. I got a lot more respect from the race yesterday and resolved (like you) to improve significantly on the swim before I attempt a full IM again. I actually ran the whole run and I have a whole black toe, not just toe-nail, today. I am hurting so much worse than last year; and I will be taking at least a year off before another full IM. I am going to do some half-IMs next year and focus on the swim.

Just take care of yourself and recover; dont' rush back to training too quick b/c your body is really beat up. Take pride in sticking it out as long as you did, and I know you can do it again!

best wishes,
Laura

[Running Mommy]

It was a brutal day out there huh? But you did GREAT!! I was looking for you in the morning, but I didn't see you.
I was looking at the pics from the race and I had such promise when I went out on that bike! In fact I told the strippers that the hard part was done! SHEESH!! What did I know!!
I had posted in another thread how nice it was to meet you and your sweetie pie mom. She has such poise and grace. And you sure take after her!!
Hopefully we can meet up again soon. Are you going to be doing SOMA in the fall?
I think the only race that I really have on the radar right now is the Sahuarita sprint on memorial day weekend. I need to plan out some more races though.
Again, great race! Recover up and hope to see you soon!
Denise

[Wahine]

Denise, hugs. You're awesome. I know that I could not barf in a porta pottie.

Love ya. You'll have another IM day!!

[Starfish]

Denise, your mental and physical toughness, combined with your wisdom to protect and take care of your body, make you an extraordinary role model.

Your courage makes me cry. You swam/biked/ran an incredibly honorable race. Wear your honor as your medal.

[crazycanuck]

Hey Denise,

Feeling better & able to see my computer screen.

Man are you ever one tough chickie! Those portaloos aren't pretty for anyone near the course by the middle of the day!!!

How were the volunteers at your event?

Reeeemember when you said if you ever won the lotto you'd venture down to Australia?

Weeel, if you guys aren't busy in May 08, why not come down & do the 1/2 IM in Bussleton? Support crew might be technical crew by then or even doing the event in a team There's always IMWA in December 08

Take care

C

[knapplaura]

Denise,
Thanks for the kind words! I am not really sure about my upcoming race schedule b/c I am moving to Alabama in July. I would love to come back here for Soma and IM AZ next year but I need to get more info on the program I am going into and how much leave I will be able to take from it.

My next race will be Tour of the Tucson Mountains, a bike race. I promised by friend I would do it with him, but it is 2 weeks away and 75 miles! But on a road bike and draft-legal; yeah! Beyond that not sure, i need to sign up for something to keep me swimming, that is for sure!

take care,
Laura

[btchance]

Denise - I am so sorry that you couldn't finish, but the weather gods just weren't with you. But I know that you are so much stronger this year than last, that you were completely prepared, and that YOU ARE IRON NO MATTER WHAT!!! Anyone who keeps pushing them self even when throwing up deserves the status of iron.