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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Black Hills of SD
    Posts
    698

    Unhappy Seems to all come at once...

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    Eldest DD has been having trouble with depression, and her *%&*#$ boyfriend decided now would be a good time to dump her so he can party. She's across the state, which isn't helpful right now. She's doing a bit better with counseling and meds. Our twins (almost 18) have been having meltdowns — seems to go with the territory. This is our year for car accidents — all 3 kids have had one since last June. One daughter had 2. Tonight my mom called and said my dad has blood clots in both legs and both lungs.

    Feeling overwhelmed,
    Deb
    2016 Kona Rove ST (M/L 54) WTB Volt
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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Western Canada-prairies, mountain & ocean
    Posts
    6,984
    I'm sorry to hear these problems.

    DD's better off without her boyfriend although she's probably not feelin' great about that.
    My Personal blog on cycling & other favourite passions.
    遙知馬力日久見人心 Over a long distance, you learn about the strength of your horse; over a long period of time, you get to know what’s in a person’s heart.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    1,650
    (((blackhillsbiker)))

    I was at a Stitch'n'***** tonight that was full of stories like reading the Book of Job. One of the women said, "In my religion it's okay to shake your fist at God, because that means that you're still talking to him."

    You're stronger than you probably feel at the moment. Hang in there!
    2014 Bobbin Bramble / Brooks B67
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  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Black Hills of SD
    Posts
    698
    I agree with DD being better without the boyfriend. She always saw more in him than we did. I just don't like anyone to hurt my babies.

    I'm scared about my dad. I can't imagine my world without him in it.

    Deb

    Thanks for the hugs. I haven't been around here much lately. Life has been closing in on me.
    2016 Kona Rove ST (M/L 54) WTB Volt
    Camp Stove Green Surly Karate Monkey (M) WTB Volt
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  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Jacksonville area of NC
    Posts
    821
    (((hugs)))

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Blessed to be all over the place!
    Posts
    3,433
    Wow! What a time! Winters are rough there, maybe DD will feel better with spring!

    While you're worrying about everyone else, don't neglect yourself.

    It's tough being between ailing parents and needy kids. Please consider counseling to get things in perspective if the feeling continues or escalates.
    If you don't grow where you're planted, you'll never BLOOM - Will Rogers

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Uncanny Valley
    Posts
    14,498
    (((((((blackhillsbiker)))))))

    Hang in there.

    Do you have someone "neutral" you can talk to about all of this? Venting here is 100% fine, but I'm sure there are details you'd rather not share in public. It's so hard when you don't have anyone who's outside of the situation you can bounce things off.
    Speed comes from what you put behind you. - Judi Ketteler

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Denver
    Posts
    1,942
    We're all here for you.

    ((hugs))

    "I never met a donut I didn't like" - Dave Wiens

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Nebraska
    Posts
    1,192
    That's a lot to deal with. Just take each day as it comes, come here to whine a little, and know we have your back.

    As for the clots, they are survivable. Since it appears to me that you dad's were caught in time for the medical team to do its magic, he should be fine. It is scary, I know. Hang in there.

    As for the kids and car wrecks, I'll let others be wise on them.
    Give big space to the festive dog that make sport in the roadway. Avoid entanglement with your wheel spoke.
    (Sign in Japan)

    1978 Raleigh Gran Prix
    2003 EZ Sport AX

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    foothills of the Ozarks aka Tornado Alley
    Posts
    4,193
    Oh Deb, bless your heart! It does seem to hit all at once. You are facing a very difficult time and it may be time to find a safe person to talk to, such as a counselor or psychiatrist. You need to protect you from undue pressures by getting good quality sleep, reducing anxiety, and learning to reframe your thinking in order to cope better with stress. A good counselor or physician can help you with that.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Traveling Nomad
    Posts
    6,763
    Deb,

    I'm sorry. That all just really sucks, especially about your dad. I hope this is the low point and things get a lot better from here. Soon.

    Hugs....
    Emily

    2011 Jamis Dakar XC "Toto" - Selle Italia Ldy Gel Flow
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    2004 Bike Friday Petite Pocket Crusoe - Selle Italia Diva Gel Flow

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    Tucson, AZ
    Posts
    1,973
    Hope things improve... sounds like a bit of a tough road right now.
    I was just writing a note last night when my DH came home saying he'd been hit by a car on his commute (see my separate post) and so my note was delayed by a day. Hang in there
    2016 Specialized Ruby Comp disc - Ruby Expert ti 155
    2010 Surly Long Haul Trucker - Jett 143

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Whitmore Lake, Michigan
    Posts
    920
    ((((Deb)))))

    You need comfort right now and I hope you're getting a boost from your buddies here! Sometimes it gets overwhelming like what you're going through right now. It does not seem like it right now but it does get better. Will be saying a prayer for your Dad and hope that all works out well for him and the rest of your dear family...

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    The Windy City
    Posts
    277
    sorry to hear about your troubles glad your daughter is doing better on meds. i take paxil mainly for anxiety, but some say anxiety is just a different sort of depression, who knows... but it helps me and i've been on it since 2002. don't plan to go off of it ever.

    hang in there. sounds like your're a good mom which is priceless to daughters {{HUGS}}
    if you don't like sewing, you haven't found the right fabric

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Black Hills of SD
    Posts
    698
    Dad is doing pretty well. He has clots "from ankle to groin," so they're monitoring him closely and he is on IV anticoagulants. I talked to him today. He sounded better than Mom. There is an umbrella-like device they're talking about placing in his vein (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferior_vena_cava_filter) when this is all over. He's not thrilled about the surgical support stockings. I don't blame him. I had to wear them for almost 10 years, before I had last summer's surgeries. Still, they beat the alternative!

    DD is doing well on Prozac. That was the first antidepressant that helped me years ago. She doesn't seem to be bothered by side effects, for which I am grateful. She has a counselor she likes. This is also very helpful.

    DDs 2 & 3 have their days. We just had several crises on top of each other. Things seem to be mellowing out a bit.

    I get lots of support from dear friends and DH. I appreciate the kind words/thoughts here as well. I haven't been riding much, what with terrible weather and just trying to cope with all the other stuff. I need to get back into the habit. It is a good stress relief for me, and I really feel it when I miss too many days.

    Deb
    Last edited by blackhillsbiker; 03-09-2011 at 05:16 AM. Reason: spelling error
    2016 Kona Rove ST (M/L 54) WTB Volt
    Camp Stove Green Surly Karate Monkey (M) WTB Volt
    Kona Dew Deluxe (54cm) Brooks B67-S

 

 

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