I'm sorry you are having such bad experiences with groups.I don't like to ride in groups for that reason myself. I get all nervous when I'm around others, like I need to be "all that" and should be better than I am. I ride with a training partner, and although we rarely stay together because she's faster than I am, it's great to have someone out there with me, but have no ego or nerves about being around others.
Perhaps you're just a better solo rider, and don't put any pressure on yourself, but when around others you feel you need to "live up" to other's non-existent expectations? That's me, anyway.
I guess I don't have any good advice, but just wanted you to know that you're not alone. I'm fine by myself, feel good and confident, but put me with others and I get the jitters.
Take care, and I hope others have words of wisdom for you!![]()