As part of our never ending kitchen update, we ordered some pine shelves. Apparently they got stolen off of our front porch. Williams-Sonoma kindly replaced them, but I was nervous as all get out waiting for them to arrive. After waiting for a backorder delay, the box I retrieve from the porch is OPEN. I guess the thieves took a look and thought "Oh no, not that again!" and left it.

After installing the shelves, we decide to order another piece of the same shelving. This time I change the delivery address to Brewer's office for security. After another funky backorder delay, we receive tracking indicating that they are scheduled for delivery Christmas Eve. Which is fine, but it might be easier to pick them up at will call at UPS.

So I try to sign up for the nifty UPS "My Choice" which lets users log in and change delivery and has some other nifty features. In the process of doing that, I get to an identity verification screen that asks me to select people I am "closely affiliated with" and to select streets where I have lived which go back to the early 1980s. Even creepier is that the street list includes a residence where my ex-husband lived after we got divorced.

The creepiest yet is that the third question asks me to confirm the birth month of my ex-husband's ex-wife!

I'm just going to let them deliver the package, and let it go at that.