Priorities

[ny biker]

I've worked at the same office since December 2000. Since February 2002 I've lived 4 miles from my office. From spring through early/mid autumn, I bring my bike to work once a week and go for a nice hilly ride after work.

Today I found out we are moving to a new facility in an industrial area of Washington DC. One of my first thoughts was, how will I do my weekly bike ride????

This is actually a pretty major life change, since in addition to the longer commute I will probably lose my ability to work flexible hours, and I won't be able to do things like run errands at lunchtime or on my way to/from work. So, less free time and more things to get done in my free time. And getting up earlier, so having to go to bed earlier, which again means less free time.

Not the biggest problem in the world, but not good.

[Crankin]

These things are very important. The fact that some may not think so says that a lot of people have their priorities messed up. I took the job I have now for the flexible hours and the ability to work a little less than full time. There are some parts of it that I don't like (I can't commute, driving all day to people's houses), but I can live with for a few more months. When my boss and I figured out that it will take me to October to get my total # of hours for my license, she said, well you should have thought of this, when you decided to work 80% time. My response was that I was thinking of my own mental health. I looked her right in the eye and said "It's summer," when she said I could just pick up a couple more cases to get to full time.
Life is too short.

[tulip]

I took a pay cut and moved to a cheaper place so I could work from home and take more vacation time. Works for me (says she who is taking 2 months off to ride a bike through Europe).

[indysteel]

Having gone through a similar change in 2009, I feel your pain and agree with Crankin that these things are important. In my case, I moved (and got married) rather than my office or job, but it disrupted many of my priorities and then some. I went through various stages of grief since then. And I do mean grief. It was as real of a loss as any other. I went from having a 20 minute walk to work to an hour long drive. I was suddenly cut off from my friends, my routine, my cycling routes and club, my yoga studio, my gym, etc., etc.

Try to be patient with yourself as you get used to the new normal. It is possible--and hopefully, likely--that you will find ways to adapt. When I first moved, I felt a lot of anger and sadness at first, but I eventually forced myself to accept that it was up to me to shift my attitude and habits. It took a while, and there are still things that I very much miss about my old routine. But I'm definitely in a better place than I was at first. So, be patient with yourself as you adjust.

[ny biker]

Thanks very much for the support.

One good thing is that our project managers understand that some people will not want to make the move, and they've already said they will try to find other projects for them to transfer to. (No guarantees, but they'll try.)

I'm willing to give it a try. Google maps says it is a 20-minute drive from my home to the new place with no traffic. During rush hour their estimate is around 40 minutes. This is not my ideal but ~45 minutes is my upper limit for an acceptable commute. The big issue will be the days when a traffic incident completely shuts down one of the major roads in the area, because this tends to stop traffic everywhere. And bad weather will also affect my commute more than it does now. (BTW driving is my best option; mass transit would take an hour each way before adding in frequent Metro screw-ups, and cycling is not a good choice due to the distance. Plus I'm not a big fan of cycling in bad weather.)

I've also found a small park with restroom facilities near my current office, and I think it might do as a new starting point for my weekly bike rides. Of course I could also look for different routes, but I kinda like the route I use now. It has enough hills to give me a good workout and has plenty of options for shortcuts or adding extra bits depending on the weather and how far I feel like riding. Since I will have to drive ~45 minutes to get to the start, I will probably be starting a bit later and riding more after dark, so I will get a better headlight.

I'm going to test drive the route to the new facility this weekend. Google maps shows a grocery store nearby, which is a plus, and also a Home Depot (because there's ALWAYS a Home Depot nearby, no matter where you go around here. Just when you think you know where they're all located, you discover a new one.) I don't actually need to shop at hardware stores all that often, but most HDs sell things like cleaning supplies and closet organizers and stuff like that, so I might be able to make use of it by picking up stuff there that I would normally get at a more general big-box store like Target.

It will be interesting to see who stays with the project and who decides to quit rather than move. I work with some good people. If the really good ones stay, it will make me more willing to stay. And those who leave will become leads for new jobs if I decide I'm just not happy with the new setup.

One advantage I have over some of my coworkers is that I know the roads in the DC area pretty darn well. I actually lived in DC when I first moved here, in two different neighborhoods; I've cycled through other parts of the city; I serve as tour guide for my parents when they visit every year; and I drive all over the place to get to bike rides so I know the highways well. And I'm not afraid to drive in the city. I may not enjoy it but I don't fear it.

Anyway. We'll probably have to vacate our current office in about a month, but the new office space needs some work and will probably not be ready right away. I think I will be working from home for a month, maybe longer. So I have time to prepare.

[rebeccaC]

Yeah I would think leaving eleven years of routine could be a change not wanted. If you do have to move to the new offices, a new routine, new roads to ride, new places for errands etc. will eventually be your new normal though. Stay positive. Having good people to work with has to help in thinking about the move! Hopefully managers do take the consequences of a move into consideration. Wouldn’t a longer commute and dealing with rush hour traffic give you a good argument FOR flexible hours?

But then…..I’ve been reading Pema Chodron tonight :
“We are like children building a sand castle. We embellish it with beautiful shells, bits of driftwood, and pieces of colored glass. The castle is ours. Yet despite all our attachment, we know that the tide will inevitably come in and sweep the sand castle away. The trick is to enjoy it fully but without clinging, and when the time comes, let it dissolve back into the sea.

When we resist change, it’s called suffering. But when we can completely let go and not struggle against it, when we can embrace the groundlessness of our situation and relax into its dynamic quality, that’s called enlightenment"