mother daughter relationships
I'm in the camp of not having a great relationship with my mother. I just find her draining with all her negative opinions about and towards me. Everything is bad, miserable, and boring. She finds fault in everything and everyone and has nothing positive to contribute.
I went from a high to a low in warp speed yesterday when I went to run an errand for her after picking up my new car. Against my better judgement I told her I got a new car (new to me, it's 3 years old) and she had absolutely nothing nice to say about it. I know it shouldn't matter what she thinks, but this was a big deal for me to be getting this car (I researched a lot and settled on a Jetta diesel) and it really just put everything into a tailspin. Is it really a boring looking car? do I look like I'm driving a old person car? There's nothing I can do, it's all done and dusted, so why should she go and dash my enthusiasm like that?
And there's no sense in talking to her, I've never been able to. Stuck between two cultures and two languages, I can't seem to have any meaningful conversations with her because of these limitations.
I will admit that she's gotten a lot worse after my dad died. He seems to have tempered her somewhat, but now that he's gone all she does is just dwell on how much she hates Canada. I do wish she'll go back to Japan permanently; when she was gone for 3 months I felt so free.
Thanks for listening to my rant.