Dear Cat

[owlice]

Dear Cats,

You come in from outside to use the litter box. Why do you do that?

Puzzled,

The woman who feeds you
__________________________________________________

Dear Little Cat,

What IS it with you and emery boards?? Please stop stealing them!

Curious,

The woman who feeds you
__________________________________________________

Dear Big Cat,

Remember "the bite" back in May? The feeling in my thumb is finally starting to return.

Scarred,

The woman who feeds you

[owlice]

Dear Little Cat,

The toilet does the.same.thing every time I flush it, I promise! You don't need to check!

Pettings,

The woman who feeds you

[skhill]

Dear Chaos kitty,

Gravity isn't going away. I promise. There's really no need to check on whether things still fall when you knock them off a high place, every single day...

--the woman who feeds you

ps the dog isn't going to feed you, no matter how much you ask him. I'm the only one aroud here with opposible thumbs...

[bmccasland]

Dear Chole kitten,
Some parts of the kitchen counter you're allowed on - as that's the only way to get to the kitchen window. But to the left of the sink and the stove is not allowed. I realize that you don't know left from right yet, but when I cook something on the stove, I don't need your help.

Signed,
the lady that bailed you out of the shelter

[bmccasland]

Dear Big Sister Cat,

The litter box is for pooping, not the floor by the litter box. Why do you do this?

the lady who cleans your messes, and who feeds you

[zoom-zoom]

Dear Little Cat,

The toilet does the.same.thing every time I flush it, I promise! You don't need to check!

Pettings,

The woman who feeds you

Ha, our youngest cat will ONLY drink from running water...he gets very upset if someone puts the lid down before flushing the toilet. He will also beg us to flush the toilet so that he can get a cold drink. We bought one of those $$ cat fountains, but it was a PITA to clean and the water wasn't cold enough for his royal highness. :rolleyes:

Dear almost-18-year-old-girl-kitty,

We brought a litter box upstairs so that you would stop peeing in the dirty laundry and we thought maybe it's hard on you to get up and down the basement stairs, but you continued to pee in the laundry. We brought a 2nd one up, thinking that you wanted separate boxes for #1 and #2. What is your deal (she's checked-out fine at the vet)? We're going to get rid of these upstairs boxes, now, since you won't comply, the 3 boys (one of whom doesn't believe in burying his massive turds) are stinkin' up the joint, tracking litter all over the kitchen, and no longer going to the effort to use the big boxes in the basement.

Sincerely,
She who is tired of pre-washing everything you p!ss on

[Biciclista]

Dear Aggie
I am really really really tired of your constant carrying on all night long. I got DH to agree to NOT let you out in the middle of the night. It has been 3 weeks and you are still carrying on. I wish I knew what your problem was!

Dear Owlice
If you go out somewhere in your yard and cultivate a small area for the cats they will use it happily. But if all you have is grass (or weeds) they won't be able to find a "decent" place to go.

[Possegal]

Dear cat who was apparently a bell-hop in a former life,

I really would like to know two things - WHY and HOW - did you manage to move my 9.2 lb cube-shaped luggage from my bedroom to the hallway. It only weighs a pound less than you. Do you have amazingly strong teeth? Are you hiding opposable thumbs from me? Did you have help?

Puzzled,

Your fascinated owner(roommate?)

[westtexas]

Dear Black and White Kitty,

Why are you pulling all your hair out? You look terrible bald. Also, you throw up lots of hairballs now. I would appreciate it if you would just leave yourself alone and let me brush you instead. Or at least take your anti-OCD medication like a champ instead of drooling all over my floor.

Just trying to help,

Your human slave.

[badger]

Dear Kitty,

why do you come back inside to barf the grass? couldn't you just do it outside so I don't have to move the bed to clean the mess?

- Your slave.

[BC2COCyclist]

Dear Dog-cat,

We miss you. :(

Hope you're having a good time whereever you are now - with lots of warm laps and treats to eat.

Love, the homo sapiens and the dogs.

[Bethany1]

Dear Buttons,

I know you have street smarts from living outside the first two months of your life, but going through the trash cans and stealing food from unsuspecting humans is getting annoying. The worst part is you are teaching my older cat to do the same thing as he snatched half my cupcake and started wolfing it down the other day.

Also, why do have a thing for socks? You steal them out of the laundry or the bedrooms and drag them around. Trying to get them back turns into a tug of war.

Getting out the squirt bottle now,

Your Slave

[Catrin]

ROFLMAO...thank you so much for sharing the wonderful quirkiness of cats :)

I have fond memories of when I first brought Jasmine home from the rescue shelter - he was about 10 months old at the time. He wasn't entirely certain that the stuffed black bear wasn't real and couldn't rest at night if it wasn't on the floor. The thing was 3xs his size and it was a hoot to watch him help the bear to the floor.every.single.night. I finally had mercy on him and found another place to put it ;)

Then there was Tigger who couldn't stand to see me in my stocking feet. Catherine's feet out of shoes and still wearing socks was in dire danger of the sock bandit! He finally broke me of doing this and I started wearing sandals around the house instead :rolleyes: He would also dig through my laundry basket in his effort to assure that no dirty sock missed his careful attention!

[jessmarimba]

Bethany, did Buttons ever have kittens? My friend's cat "mothers" litters of socks, since her real kittens were taken from her too early (before she was found and fixed).

[nscrbug]

My male kitty, who spends LOTS of supervised (by DH) time outdoors has never, ever pooped or pee'd outside. He will ALWAYS wait to come indoors to use the litterbox. And there are plenty of spots where he could 'go'...he just doesn't seem to like doing it outdoors. I guess he is well-trained and must think that going potty outdoors is for "uncivilized" cats. :D

[indysteel]

My cats have all have odd habits:

We keep a stash of plastic grocery store bags downstairs in the basement for litter scooping purposes. Just so that the cats don't suffocate playing with them, we tie them in knots. Well, Izzy is obsessed with them. She drags them up from the basement and leaves a trail of them upstairs. She's been doing this since was was still pretty small, i.e., when the bags where as big as her. The cats love to play in boxes, we we often have one or more sitting around the house. I looked in one of them the other day and there were plastic bags inside.

Izzy also likes being carried around in stuff. When we cart the laundry basket up and down the stairs, she likes to get in it and go for a ride. She also likes to be carried around in our shopping bags. She's not a mellow cat otherwise, so it cracks us up that she not only tolerates it, but seems to enjoy it.

Sophie had a two mouse toys (the one that are about three inches long with a bell at one end). She got them when she was a kitten. Nearly every night around 8 or 9 p.m., she's bring me one of the mice. As she carried it to me--often from another room--she'd make this funny cry the entire way. It was a very mouse-specific cry; she otherwise never made that sound. When we had her cremated, we included one of the mice. The other one sits next to her ashes.

Henry doesn't bring me anything on a regular basis, but he is completely and utterly obsessed with newspaper. He licks it, he lays in it, he bats it out of your hand as you try to read it, he licks it some more. He waits at the front door while you retrieve it in the morning and then follows you around until he can get to it. It's apparently all that he thinks about. He also does something we call Freakout Cat. Henry is a pretty lazy animal, even as cats go. But about once or twice a day, he goes absolutely crazy. It often starts with him running toward a door jam and jumping up about five feet. He plays with all his toys in a flurry. He makes a bunch of wacky noises and cries. He hides under a blanket and then claws at it like he's trapped. He'll do some combination of this for about five minutes. Then he stares at you and blinks his eyes for a few seconds before promptly falling asleep. It's the funniest thing.

I love cats, but they are so strange (and infinitely entertaining).

[Bethany1]

Buttons is 4 months old. She was the runt of the litter and had to fight for everything including food as her sisters were able to get to it first. I took her home at 2 months but her scavenging for things hasn't stopped. It probably never will.

Vet says she's doing good and is healthy. I just have to keep using the squirt bottle when she tries to get into the trash. She's getting better.

Dear Bandit,

Howling at the front and back door will get you nowhere. We have this argument every day. You know the agreement: If you can get the door open by yourself, you can come and go when you please. (He will use his paws to rattle the handles to turn them)

The Gatekeeper

[Biciclista]

Dear Small Brown Cat (Nutmeg)

I know that rubber bands, twist ties, ribbons, threads and bandaides are incredibly attractive. But do you have to eat them??
Are you punishing us because we limit your exposure to real bugs? (I've noticed that we don't have a resident spider population anymore) I live in fear of you having to have surgery to remove all the inedible stuff you have eaten. Nice kitty!

[Titania]

These responses have me laughing so hard!

One of my cats, Teddy, insists on petting me in the evenings. When I sit on the couch, he'll jump up and sit behind me, then start running his claws through my hair, purring like crazy and rubbing his face all over the back of my head.

Dear Elliott,

Why do you insist on only peeing in one small corner of the littler box? Do you not realize that it's extremely difficult to get a 2 lb clump of cat pee out of the litter box and into a bag without dropping it everywhere?

Sincerely,
The pooper scooper

[katluvr]

These responses have me laughing so hard!

Dear Elliott,

Why do you insist on only peeing in one small corner of the littler box? Do you not realize that it's extremely difficult to get a 2 lb clump of cat pee out of the litter box and into a bag without dropping it everywhere?

Sincerely,
The pooper scooper

I will ditto that and send to Dear Pepper!

Also Dear Pepper,
Will you please welcome Velcro to the household. She PICKED our house and I know she doesn't really like other kitties much, but she is very sweet and if you quit attacking her maybe, must maybe she would not hiss at you!

Your Mommie

Dear Lucky,
As see in the other "Dear Cat" requests:
There are 3 (yes 3) litter boxes in the den AND 1 litter box in YOUR bathroo. Poop goes IN the litter box, not in front for me to see & pick up. Thanks for leaving it neatly for me to see...but I really don't need to see it.

Love your Mommie

[Roadtrip]

Dear Kat,

I realize the cooler evenings have you confused. You want to be where it's warm and cozy. That place right now HAS to be under the covers snuggled against my hip? Cute at first, but you get warm... Jump down... Jump up... Jump down... Jump up... Is sleep deprivation really your punishment for bringing the dog home?? That was six plus years ago!!!

Thanks,
Your midnight snuggle partner and very caffeinated slave

[beccaB]

Dear Dog..
you were re-homed 3 times before I met you. If I hadn't been in the right place at the right time I wouldn't have had that opportunity. I can't say it's been easy, but it has been one of the most rewarding things I've ever done.
Love, your person forever and ever.

[Thorn]

Dear Black and White Kitty,

Why are you pulling all your hair out? You look terrible bald. Also, you throw up lots of hairballs now. I would appreciate it if you would just leave yourself alone and let me brush you instead. Or at least take your anti-OCD medication like a champ instead of drooling all over my floor.

Just trying to help,

Your human slave.

Psst...gluten intolerance? Had a cat that pulled out her hair. Turned out she was gluten intolerant and the hair pulling was a pain reaction. Put her on a gluten-free diet and she's got fur, she's active and I think some days the princess costs more to feed than me.

Now, if someone could explain....

Dear Boy Cat,

They are wool socks. Just socks. You can leave then in the dirty clothes pile. No need to bring them upstairs one at a time. And, really, no need to announce to the world you found another.

The Can Opener

[jessmarimba]

VELCRO!!! :D too cute! :D

Dear Skunk,
I'm out of slippers. You're going to have to find someplace else to puke. Just please let it be where I can find it, because mummified cat vomit is disturbing. Oh, and I'm with everyone else on the request to poop IN the litterbox, rather than beside it.

Sincerely,
the mean lady who won't let you outside anymore

[Bethany1]

Dear Buttons,

I have video evidence of you getting into the box of cookies now so can't claim innocence or blame my other cat. Very ingenious of you to push the box off the table so the cookies fall out onto the floor for your edible enjoyment.

If I wasn't laughing so hard while taping, you'd be in really big trouble right now.

Enjoy your sugar cookie. If you puke all night, don't come to me for sympathy.


The Mom

[CyborgQueen]

All of these have me laughing!!

Let's see....

Every time I open my drawer with my brush and hairbands, my Penny comes running in the bathroom (and she could be sleeping on the other side of the house), to try to grab some of the hairbands. I've lost so many of them that they're all over the house.

Reno tend to swat at me and my DF when we walk past him without petting. He gets a in a hissy fit if he gets no attention.

Mocha is the pee'er. She'll pee on our clothes/towels if we leave them on the floor. We've tried medications, and it does help. I may have to put her back on them again (anti-anxiety meds).

Penny and Telly (yes, named after Penn and Teller...after all, I do live in Vegas) - LOVE to lick plastic bags, and goes nuts over them. The other three, not so much.

We get boxes all the time, so we always change our cardboard boxes from time to time to keep the cats entertained...cheaper than getting a cat tree.


Anyone have multicat household? I HIGHLY recommend this gigantic litter box that can hold 25-40 lbs of litter. I do have two smaller ones spread out, but all the cats use this box and very easy to clean.


Those who are sick of "poop" outside the box...it COULD be that the fur that the cats are swallowing get stuck on their butts, so as they exit the litterbox, they "shake" 'em off. Happened quite a few times with my cats.

[WindingRoad]

Dearest Peanut,

Please behave while 'Grandma' is watching you. Try not to scare her dogs and bully them. Stop glaring at poor Bosley so he can't get into her bedroom to his bed. Stop hissing and swatting at Zoe when she goes running by. Poor doggies:rolleyes: There is a reason your nickname is "Peavil".

Your human :)

[jessmarimba]

Penny and Telly (yes, named after Penn and Teller...after all, I do live in Vegas) - LOVE to lick plastic bags, and goes nuts over them. The other three, not so much.

...........

Anyone have multicat household? I HIGHLY recommend this gigantic litter box that can hold 25-40 lbs of litter. I do have two smaller ones spread out, but all the cats use this box and very easy to clean.


Those who are sick of "poop" outside the box...it COULD be that the fur that the cats are swallowing get stuck on their butts, so as they exit the litterbox, they "shake" 'em off. Happened quite a few times with my cats.

Clementine's favorite flavor of plastic bags is Target, by far. But grocery store bags will suffice if nothing else is available.

I have a giant storage tub as my litter box. The walls are high enough that they can't fling, and no way is anyone accidentally leaving their butt hanging out of the box when they "use" it. But while Skunk does have long hair and occasionally leaves poop surprises around the house, I've seen her perch on the corner of the box and deliberately go over the edge (outside). I think it's less likely to stick in her hair if she sits like that...but I wish she'd learn to do it IN the box and not OUT. Or heck, over the toilet.

[westtexas]

Psst...gluten intolerance? Had a cat that pulled out her hair. Turned out she was gluten intolerant and the hair pulling was a pain reaction. Put her on a gluten-free diet and she's got fur, she's active and I think some days the princess costs more to feed than me.


Well, maybe, but Theo's been on a grain-free diet since I got him 3 years ago. He only has done it when other cats have lived with us, but this time it's worse than usual. I think the move, coupled with weird apartment noises (we used to live in a very quiet, secluded neighborhood), a new kitty in our lives, and all the travelling I have been doing lately has him really stressed out. He's my sweet, sensitive boy. Amitryptilline seems to do the trick though!

[bmccasland]

Those who are sick of "poop" outside the box...it COULD be that the fur that the cats are swallowing get stuck on their butts, so as they exit the litterbox, they "shake" 'em off. Happened quite a few times with my cats.

Nope, sometimes it's by the litterbox, others it's across the room. There is purposeful litter box avoidance. But she'll pee in the box. The really crazy thing was I took her with me to a friend's house for the weekend, along with one of the litter boxes. She was a perfect house guest and used the box all weekend. Came home, put the same box down, and she poops next to it. :confused:

[marni]

dear tuxie and miss ike

Just once could I please brush my teeth and wash my face at night without having to move a kitty butt out of each sink, repeatedly?

Miss Ike,

today I found 50, yes I did count them, of your milk rings under the Welsh Cupboard in the bedroom. I thought you were looking a bit deprived. I am going to time how many days it takes you to fish them individually out of the drawer and hide them.

Tuxie,

Yes baby, I know that my hot sweaty exercise clothes and biking cloths are dirty and need washing. I do not need you leaping into the laundry basket,fishing out the items individually and strewing them along the hallway to the kitchen and laundry room while I am asleep. Honest.

thank you both sweeties,

your caregiver.

[Biciclista]

Nope, sometimes it's by the litterbox, others it's across the room. There is purposeful litter box avoidance. But she'll pee in the box. The really crazy thing was I took her with me to a friend's house for the weekend, along with one of the litter boxes. She was a perfect house guest and used the box all weekend. Came home, put the same box down, and she poops next to it. :confused:

Beth, maybe it's the kind of litter you use?

[zoom-zoom]

Anyone have multicat household? I HIGHLY recommend this gigantic litter box that can hold 25-40 lbs of litter. I do have two smaller ones spread out, but all the cats use this box and very easy to clean.

Yep, we have 2 of those in the basement...they are awesome (I mean, if a litter box can BE awesome)!

[lph]

Dear sweet big strong Lyra,

yes, we know you are a wild and independent creature with a rich, and let's not forget, nocturnal life. We all worship the ground you pound along on.

But honestly - when you sleep all day, upside down, on the rocking chair (yes, ds was home all day, he blabbed on you) - and then spend all night:
1. catching a mouse, bringing it in alive and then chasing it around the living room
2. getting into a loud fight with the tom cat next door not once but three times in the course of the night...

you're out of sympathy. Yes, I got up to check that you were all right. No, I won't be doing that next time. Shut up and go to sleep. You have a cat flap and can come inside, just let it go.

- your exhausted house inhabitants

[owlice]

Dear Big Cat,

Thanks for getting off the loveseat before puking up a hairball; that was nice of you.

Appreciatively,

The woman who feeds you

[Becky]

Yep, we have 2 of those in the basement...they are awesome (I mean, if a litter box can BE awesome)!

We're in the process of switching to stainless steel litter pans. Those are most definitely awesome! Stuff doesn't stick nearly as badly to them as to plastic, and they're easy to sanitize.

I never thought that I could love a litter pan...

[Titania]

I'd LOVE to get one of those, but I've never seen one big enough for my luggs. Both of my cats are over 16 lbs, and one of my cats is extremely long...neither fit well in standard litter boxes. I have one of those HUGE litter boxes that fits a cement truck full of litter.

Dear Elliott,

I do love you dearly, but you must understand that sometimes the two-footed cats need "alone" time. We really don't need your help and support when we're trying to use the restroom.

Love,
The woman who wishes you didn't feel the need to sit on my underwear while I'm using the toilet.

[zoom-zoom]

Love,
The woman who wishes you didn't feel the need to sit on my underwear while I'm using the toilet.

Ha, our Lola (the laundry-pee'r) used to LOVE to sit behind our butts on the toilet. SO glad she outgrew that habit! On second thought...I'd rather she do that than pee on the clothes.

[Owlie]

Dear DBF's cat:
Please stop complaining every time I call him. I can hear you over the phone.

[Roadtrip]

Dear DBF's cat:
Please stop complaining every time I call him. I can hear you over the phone.

Lol. Your the 'other' person in his life. They were there first, right?!?

[Rebecca19804]

Dear Aggie
I am really really really tired of your constant carrying on all night long. I got DH to agree to NOT let you out in the middle of the night. It has been 3 weeks and you are still carrying on. I wish I knew what your problem was!



Hi Mimi, I don't know the details of course but understand that persistent 'yowling' can indicate a thyroid problem? Just a thought.

On the other hand, maybe the neighbours got a new dog? :)

[Biciclista]

ick thyroid. Already went down that road with other cat. And now this time we can't afford it. !! gotta go to the veterinarian.

[zoom-zoom]

I didn't know about the thyroid/yowling connection. Our female is hyperthyroid and noisy, but she was noisy long before her diagnosis. I think she's just bossy.

[CyborgQueen]

This is the jumbo litter box I use. It's like 2 feet long.

http://www.petsmart.com/product/index.jsp?productId=4217935

I do have three smaller ones spread out through the house, but this is the main one that all of them use.


Keep 'em coming. All of these are hilarious!! Luckily I'm deaf, so I don't hear them all crying, howling or whatever noise they make at night!

[wackyjacky1]

Dear cute-but-dumb girlcat,

Why do you insist on draping yourself across the computer keyboard when I am trying to type? The people I am sending messages to don't understand what [[[[[[[[[[99999y7p[pkkkkoooooooooo;;;;;;;;; means.

Kindest regards,
The woman who feeds you.

[jessmarimba]

Dear cute-but-dumb girlcat,

Why do you insist on draping yourself across the computer keyboard when I am trying to type? The people I am sending messages to don't understand what [[[[[[[[[[99999y7p[pkkkkoooooooooo;;;;;;;;; means.

Kindest regards,
The woman who feeds you.

What's sad is that the people I'm trying to send messages to DO understand that. And I know what ichat/emails from my mother that look like that mean.

[skhill]

Dear my longhaired friend,

Thanks for leaving your most recent hairball on the bathroom floor-- that's a much better spot than my bed. But is there any way you could let me know its there before I step on it in the dark? And just how does a cat your size produce a hairball that big anyhow?

Love, your cleaning crew

[Bethany1]

Dear Cats,

Thank you for coming to my rescue while crying. It had been a bad day and having the two of you come snuggle next to me purring away really helped.


The Mom

[Roadtrip]

before I step on it in the dark?

Oh.... There are worse things to step on in the dark. Mine left a mouse head for me. Yes, just the head (like in the Godfather), such love!!!

Shannon

[marni]

and there is nothing at all like stepping into a nice warm shower first thing in the morning and finding a dead rabbit eyebll staring up at you from the drain.

marni

[lph]

Marni ftw!:D

[VeganBikeChick]

Dear Kitties,

Thank you so much for the warm snuggles upon my return home from a trip. It's not coming home to an empty house when I have my little furballs to look forward to.

[jessmarimba]

So glad my cats stay in and the critters stay out!! The worse I find are dismembered crickets.

Dear kitten:

I don't know how something so small can have lungs so large. Or the vocal capacity to yowl at full volume for 12 hours straight. Impressive. But I can't wait until I pick you up and you're semi-sedated.

Sincerely,
The woman who is getting you snipped

[Roadtrip]

and there is nothing at all like stepping into a nice warm shower first thing in the morning and finding a dead rabbit eyebll staring up at you from the drain.

marni

Wow. Sounds like something from a Hitchcock film.., or a Steven king novel.

[marni]

Wow. Sounds like something from a Hitchcock film.., or a Steven king novel.

The second and third time it happened I was ever so sanguine about it. However, the cats both became indoor cats the very next day!

marni

[wackyjacky1]

Marni ftw!:D
Totally. LOL :D and blech :eek: !

[Sardine]

This made me laugh too. I've had the mouse head only experience and the odd kidney lying about but thankfully no rabbit eyeballs. Mine got a bell put on him the day he brought a bird home. He still managed to catch mice though which is beyond me as he was tubby (6.5 kg) and the least agile cat I know. I miss the boy who lives with the ex now.

[Biciclista]

Dear Aggie,
I must tell you how relieved I am that you've decided that cold wet weather is NOT your thing. It is amazing how happy you are to just stay in the house on my bed (smiling glibly) instead of wanting out at all hours of the day and night.
I'm sleeping better,thanks
m

[chincitop]

Dear (formerly?) evil cat,

We've had you for 4 years. You were the most ungrateful cat I've ever known, and you wanted nothing to do with us. People were afraid of you, because you would attack people for doing things like walking, or shifting in their seat. Now, suddenly, you are in my room, snuggling up, and licking my face. Don't get me wrong, it's adorable, but also kind of terrifying. Sorry for wondering if one day Ill wake up without a kidney

Love,

your adoring but terrified bed partner

[Possegal]

Dear cute-but-dumb girlcat,

Why do you insist on draping yourself across the computer keyboard when I am trying to type? The people I am sending messages to don't understand what [[[[[[[[[[99999y7p[pkkkkoooooooooo;;;;;;;;; means.

Kindest regards,
The woman who feeds you.

The big guy in my avatar (RIP) used to send things to the printer from my computer. More complicated because I was at my house about 20 miles away from my work, where the printer was. So I'd have to email someone and say - you know that email conversation we were having? Well Bailey just sent it to the printer. Could you run over there and pick it up? He would also send emails just as I opened them, so the recipient got a blank email.

Love all these stories. Cats are just so entertaining!

[marni]

everyone who is a cat owner should read Robert Heinleins "the door into summer."

Cats have to sleep 23 hours and 23 minutes each day in order to dream the world alive. It's what they manage to do in the remaining 37 minutes that make life so interesting.

marni

[zoom-zoom]

The big guy in my avatar (RIP) used to send things to the printer from my computer. More complicated because I was at my house about 20 miles away from my work, where the printer was. So I'd have to email someone and say - you know that email conversation we were having? Well Bailey just sent it to the printer. Could you run over there and pick it up? He would also send emails just as I opened them, so the recipient got a blank email.

Ha, our Lola is famous for starting iTunes. I have NO idea how she does that! Must be a function key of some sort on my keyboard, but I don't even know how to start it, that way!

[feral1]

Dear Bubba,
Laying on my chest at 1 am and staring at me will not make me get up and feed you......laying on my chest at 2 am purring and staring at me will not make me feed you.........laying on my chest at 3 am......4am......5 am.........so do you want chicken or fish uggggggggggg:mad:.

Your can opener

[wackyjacky1]

Dear (formerly?) evil cat,
We've had you for 4 years. You were the most ungrateful cat I've ever known, and you wanted nothing to do with us. People were afraid of you, because you would attack people for doing things like walking, or shifting in their seat. Now, suddenly, you are in my room, snuggling up, and licking my face. Don't get me wrong, it's adorable, but also kind of terrifying. Sorry for wondering if one day Ill wake up without a kidney
Love,
your adoring but terrified bed partner
Oh my gosh, you could be describing my big mean tuxedo cat. He was a feral cat, and although he's 7 now and has mellowed somewhat, he still scares everyone!

[Norse]

Dear Lucy:

We absolutely adore you and you make us laugh with your antics, but could you PLEASE stop attacking our legs and feet with your 5:00 am wake-up call? It is not going to make us get up any earlier to feed you.

Sincerely,
Your Sleep Deprived People

[Bethany1]

Dear Cats,

I am working on a quilting project and will deliberately ignore you. You may NOT steal my bobbins out of the drawer and take off with them. Sitting on the foot pedal is NOT helping so get off. Any paws that get a needle stuck in them is your own fault and I will charge you the vet fees if you do. BTW, a needle through your finger hurts so I'm sure it's the same with paws. Sticking your head into my project is not smart either and will result in your head getting shoved out of the way. Dumping my stuff onto the floor to check out the contents is also not allowed.

For your own safety and my sanity, you are all banished from my presence and put in the bedroom. Any howling and banging against the door will be ignored.

The Mom

[Hi Ho Silver]

I don't have any cats, but I find this thread hilarious and addictive! More letters to your cats, please!? :D

[Owlie]

I don't have any cats, but I find this thread hilarious and addictive! More letters to your cats, please!? :D

Me too. No kitty, though the boyfriend has one. See below.

Dear BF's Cat:
You are loud! And I apparently can't say the word "cookie" on the phone, because you get all excited and start heading toward the pantry...

[pll]

I don't have any cats, but I find this thread hilarious and addictive! More letters to your cats, please!? :D

I don't have a cat either, but the stories of cats that turn iTunes on, or "type" messages are hilarious. They remind me of this video from BBC Comedy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYe1d5_LS0s

[zoom-zoom]

I don't have a cat either, but the stories of cats that turn iTunes on, or "type" messages are hilarious. They remind me of this video from BBC Comedy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYe1d5_LS0s

Awesome...just shared on FB!

[lauraelmore1033]

Dear Skittles,
Although it is really impressive that you are such a big, strong girl that you can bust down the bathroom door, I'd really rather you didn't; mommie likes her privacy when she's on the toilet. She's just funny that way...

[Bethany1]

Dear Buttons,

I told you if you tried to climb off the towel rack and land on the side of tub to check out the bubbles you'd fall in but you didn't listen. However; the look on your face was priceless when you got your head out of the water and realized the horrors of water. Bet you'll listen better next time, but probably not.

I do think Bandit enjoyed the show as he looked rather smug. He knows better after his experience.

[Biciclista]

Dear Aggie
you were an angel last night.
thank you. Or did it have something to do with the 50 degree temp outside last night?
:p:cool:

[spokewench]

Jag:

Are you sleeping in my lap more in the evening because you luv me; or is it already getting too cold for your little short haired body?

[badger]

Dear Princess,

I think punching me and nearly taking my left eye out (and now I have nice puncture wound and a shiner, to boot) is not how you make new friends.

I know you had a tough life being abandoned and now you've found a cozy home in the warehouse, but remember the nice lap you were on the other day, drooling away from all the attention?

I don't hate you, but next time, please don't try to take my eye out!

love,
visitor

[Sardine]

I don't have a cat either, but the stories of cats that turn iTunes on, or "type" messages are hilarious. They remind me of this video from BBC Comedy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYe1d5_LS0s

Brilliant! Thanks. Don't watch television. Maybe I should.

[jusdooit]

Dear Flash,
I know this may be a surprise to you , but not every thing is eatable, including electrical cords. You have lived here for 2 years, I think you know when I open the back door it's to let the dogs out, not you. And while we're being honest here, I really do not need your help in the bathroom, I can do it all by myself.

The woman who saved you from the parking lot.

[jessmarimba]

Dear Critter -

I have to admit, I'm loving this phase where you think I've "rescued" you every time we leave the vet (and you seem to forget that I brought you there in the first place)

Thanks for being a good boy while we were there and letting that sticky red-spotted child pet you.

Love,

Your favorite lap

[skhill]

Dear cats

It's great that all three of you want to cuddle with me now that the weather is turning cooler. But y'all should know by now that all three of you do not fit on my lap together. And Joe, if you try again to push someone off my lap so you can have it, you're getting a time-out.

Love, the heat source

[Roadtrip]

Dear Cat,

Why the sudden fascination with what ever I'm about to out in my mouth?

You've never been remotely interested in "people" food in the past, with the exception to tuna fish Sammie I sometimes make and cold filtered water from the fridge, so what gives?

I know you wouldn't drink the coffee I sit down, but you race to smell, just to be sure???

[marni]

Dear cats

It's great that all three of you want to cuddle with me now that the weather is turning cooler. But y'all should know by now that all three of you do not fit on my lap together. And Joe, if you try again to push someone off my lap so you can have it, you're getting a time-out.

Love, the heat source

My husband once took a picture of mee in the fall with Tux the maine coon cuddled in my arms with his forehead pressed against my chin, Jason our ginger polydactyl curled up in the crook of my bent knees and Cappy our geriatric ocicat perched on my hip, all of us sound asleed.

It isn't quite cold/cool/ less than steamy hot enough here for the lap fights to start here yet, but in the meantime there is already additional competition from Rowena, the teacup 14 pound corgie with the memory span of a gold fish, who has not yet learned that Tux outweighs her by 4 pounds

good times are coming along with canine feline sibling rivalry.

marni

[Atlas]

Dear Frisbee,
I'm not sure what I did to deserve so many cuddles today, but thanks. Don't take this as a go-ahead to break something tomorrow.
Love, the person who wields the orange string toy

[Bethany1]

Dear Buttons,

I see you have moved up in the world of stealing items from socks and human food to stealing diamond rings. Yes, it's shiny and fits in your mouth but it's NOT yours.

Just be grateful I found it and happen to like you.

BTW, sleeping on my head is not helping your cause.


The Mom

[lph]

BTW, sleeping on my head is not helping your cause.

*snort* :D

[Dogmama]

Dear Murphy,

It's two o'clock in the freakin' morning.

'nuff said

--------------------------

On another note - anybody try calling their house repeatedly during the day to wake up the cat in hopes of getting a full night's sleep? Or am I the only weirdo here? (P.S., obviously, it doesn't work.)

[bmccasland]

Dear Chloe,
Despite your attempts at teaching me to speak PNW Kitteh, I don't know what you want when you sit on my lap and meow at me with such a plaintive voice. You have food, am petting you, you're purring up a storm, what else do you need :confused:

Also, did you pick up a cold at the boarding hotel? I hope you get over the sniffles. Didn't really need the sneeze on the laptop keyboard. One cat with chronic upper respiratory infections is sufficient on the cosmic scheme of things, and that role was filled by Erin (may she be healthy across the Rainbow Bridge).

[indysteel]

Dear Henry: would you mind telling me what's wrong? I know that didn't like being left alone for the week, but you're acting stranger than normal. Do you not feel well and, if so, how? The pet sitter's notes don't indicate anything unusual, but given your propensity to contract mystery illnesses, you have me worried.

Signed,

Your anxious mother

[Dogmama]

Dear Henry: would you mind telling me what's wrong? I know that didn't like being left alone for the week, but you're acting stranger than normal. Do you not feel well and, if so, how? The pet sitter's notes don't indicate anything unusual, but given your propensity to contract mystery illnesses, you have me worried.

Signed,

Your anxious mother

Dear Anxious,

I'm punishing you.

Henry

[HoosierGiant]

Dear Little Cat,

Is there some sort of logical explanation for the way you eat? It doesn't even have to be human logic really; feline logic will suffice.

In the 15 months that we've owned you, you have been observed eating out of the food bowl only five times. Why do you feel it necessary to scoop the dry catfood out onto the floor before consuming it, then leaving all the little crumbs behind to attract ants?

Worse yet, why do you prefer to slide the food bowl next to the water bowl so you can scoop the food into the water and then retrieve the floaties from the water in order to consume them? I wouldn't mind this behavior so much if it didn't involve flinging water everywhere -- the walls, the floor, the trash can, the fire extinguisher, the container for paper recyclables. We had to resort to placing a folded towel under the water bowl to confine at least some of the mess, but now you like to play with the towel, which generally upends the water bowl, sending a river of water across the downward slope of the floor so it pools under the legs of the antique cherry dining table.

Apparently the human occupants of the house are easy to train. We tried non-skid bowls, but that just meant you'd empty the entire food bowl onto the floor in an attempt to transfer the contents to the water bowl. We reverted to the original containers because, when we hear you sliding the food bowl around, we can run to toss a handful of its contents into the water bowl, thereby limiting the mess you will make. And since you purr the entire time you are fishing/eating, we can only assume our reponse was exactly what you had intended. But, at least one of the other cats has fallen under your spell as well. Lester, who was perfectly happy with tap water in the bowl for the two years we owned him before you entered the picture, will now only drink water that has had dry cat food floating in it. Duchess, who is the finicky geriatric feline, won't go near the water bowl unless it is spotless and uncontaminated, and would never dream of stepping in the watery mess you leave behind on the floor.

On good days it's comical the amount of time we spend maintaining the smorgasboard for you; on bad days it doesn't even begin to approach funny.

What gives?

Signed,
Owner who says, "It's a good thing you're so cute"

[Biciclista]

Dear HoosierGiant
your cat is a genius! It has been proven that a diet of dry cat food is not good for cats as it keeps them dehydrated; it's also bad for their kidneys. Your genius of a cat has discovered that he can keep better hydrated by dipping his food in the water. I am extremely impressed.
Signed I have to make cat food from whole chickens for my cats Mimi

[VeganBikeChick]

Dear Laverne and Shirley,

No, it is not humorous when you bolt out the door as soon as I open it when coming home. Nevermind the fact that you don't get very far as you only escape into the corridor, but I'm sure you enjoy me calling your name down the hallway and the show I put on for the neighbors when I have to chase and "catch" you.

Signed,
No treats for you today.

[indysteel]

Dear Anxious,

I'm punishing you.

Henry

I wish it was just that. He seems downright weak and lethargic. :(

[Biciclista]

Dear Mom
feed me now.
Don't even TRY to read that newspaper
Love Enza
http://a1.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/308594_2300000692034_1009659155_32677484_1939761451_n.jpg

[Owlie]

I wish it was just that. He seems downright weak and lethargic. :(

:(

Dear black and white kitty--
Thank you for staying put while I rode past you...I just hope you did the same thing for the car behind me!

Dear DBF's cat--
No, rubbing on the phone will not magically make it produce treats, and it may or may not persuade the humans to give you treats either. You don't need any. You're fat enough as it is.

[skhill]

Dear Mom
feed me now.
Don't even TRY to read that newspaper
Love Enza


Mine were doing that this morning. Wasn't about food, but an approaching thunderstorm.

Dear boy cats,

Why are you so mean to the girl cat at meal times? You each have the same things on your plates; it's not like she has something extra-special or twice as much. Why don't you let her eat in peace, instead of pushing her away from her plate?

Love, your can opener

[indysteel]

Henry, please get better ASAP. Mommy can only take so much. I'm glad I listened to my gut and got you into the vet, but the fact that your temp is over 104 and you've lost a pound in two weeks has me freaked out. I love you so much buddy. You're supposed to live to a ripe old age, so please stop getting sick.

Signed,

Your sad and worried Mother

[Becky]

I'm sorry, Indy :( Sending good thoughts and prayers to you and Henry!

[VeganBikeChick]

Get well soon Henry and stop worrying your mother!

[spokewench]

Ok, my 1 year adopted black Jag! What is with you? So, I went away for the weekend to visit my elderly parents. I had someone feed and pet you. So, I get home and every time you come in the door and realize someone is in the house you run out the door as quick as you came in like you don't recognize me and Dad?

Are you nuts or what? When you wanted a lap and a bed all night, you sure didn't act like you didn't recognize me! You Crazy Cat with the anxiety disorder

[indysteel]

Thanks guys. This happened last year as well. He spent a week at the vet and they were never able to pinpoint what he had--which makes what may be a repeat performance all that more frustrating. He at least doesn't seem nearly as sick as last time. He was practically catonic then and was having diarrhea and vomiting. This time, he's been eating and drinking pretty normally and without incident. It's really the fever primarily. I kept him at the vet so that they can keep a close eye on him. If he doesn't respond to treatment in 24 hours then we'll start running various labs. He had bloodwork in late July that was normal. Ugh.

[bmccasland]

Thanks guys. This happened last year as well. He spent a week at the vet and they were never able to pinpoint what he had--which makes what may be a repeat performance all that more frustrating. He at least doesn't seem nearly as sick as last time. He was practically catonic then and was having diarrhea and vomiting. This time, he's been eating and drinking pretty normally and without incident. It's really the fever primarily. I kept him at the vet so that they can keep a close eye on him. If he doesn't respond to treatment in 24 hours then we'll start running various labs. He had bloodwork in late July that was normal. Ugh.

Indy - could he be diabetic? One of my kitties, who used to like to eat, then didn't, turned out to be diabetic. Seems blood work is on order to me.

[Ered_Lithui]

Dear fuzz-face,
Why the sudden fascination with flinging my socks into the air and then pouncing on them?
Your doorperson

[indysteel]

Indy - could he be diabetic? One of my kitties, who used to like to eat, then didn't, turned out to be diabetic. Seems blood work is on order to me.

His blood glucose has been normal thus far, plus no excessive thirst or urination. Certainly I'll double check though.

[jessmarimba]

Indy I hope he's feeling better soon!


Dear Critter:
I know you spent the first 6 months of your life dumpster-diving, but could I just eat my food in peace? Yours is down in the bowl in your room. I don't know what you find so appealing about peach cobbler anyway (or salad, for pete's sake!). And you're gonna have to get over this "only-nice-when-you-want-food" thing.

Signed,
The stingy person who won't share her food

[indysteel]

Dear Henry: I'm so glad your fever has broken. I hope it stays that way. I'm sorry, buddy, but you're going to have to stay at the vet a bit longer until Daddy can pick you up this evening. Think of it this way: at least at the vet, your sister isn't there to beat you up. You know how she is when you come home from the vet. And, yes, I am going to reschedule your teeth cleaning. You aren't getting off that easy.

Please, please, please stay healthy from now on. I know you're getting older, but I can't bear the thought of losing you. I was so sad when we lost your big sister, but you know you're my special boy. I've never loved anything quite like you.

[bmccasland]

Dear Critter:
I know you spent the first 6 months of your life dumpster-diving, but could I just eat my food in peace? Yours is down in the bowl in your room. I don't know what you find so appealing about peach cobbler anyway (or salad, for pete's sake!). And you're gonna have to get over this "only-nice-when-you-want-food" thing.

Signed,
The stingy person who won't share her food

I have curious Chloe a nice sniff of hot peppers last night. :eek: That got her off the kitchen counter. I got to eat my dinner in peace too.


Dear Henry: I'm so glad your fever has broken. I hope it stays that way. I'm sorry, buddy, but you're going to have to stay at the vet a bit longer until Daddy can pick you up this evening. Think of it this way: at least at the vet, your sister isn't there to beat you up. You know how she is when you come home from the vet. And, yes, I am going to reschedule your teeth cleaning. You aren't getting off that easy.

Please, please, please stay healthy from now on. I know you're getting older, but I can't bear the thought of losing you. I was so sad when we lost your big sister, but you know you're my special boy. I've never loved anything quite like you.

Indy - hope Henry continues on his road to recovery. I know the helpless feeling of watching a pet move towards the winter of his / her years.

[indysteel]

Indy - hope Henry continues on his road to recovery. I know the helpless feeling of watching a pet move towards the winter of his / her years.

Yes; it is difficult, and I'm in denial to some degree. He's just turning 12 now, and I keep hoping that he'll be one of those cats who lives to be 20. He's mostly a really robust cat, but when he gets sick, he really gets sick....from something we haven't been able to identify. The best I can do is offer him good preventative care and keep his stress level down if at all possible. So far, all his labs, e.g., kidney and thyroid function, look good. It's his immune system I worry about.

Now if I could just find a home for our outside cats. They cannot be helping the situation. While we take a lot of precautions in terms of our limited interaction with them, it still makes me very nervous to have outside cats among us. There's a chance that one of our neighbors will take them, but nothing is firm at this point.

[Dogmama]

Dear Critter:
I know you spent the first 6 months of your life dumpster-diving, but could I just eat my food in peace? Yours is down in the bowl in your room. I don't know what you find so appealing about peach cobbler anyway (or salad, for pete's sake!). And you're gonna have to get over this "only-nice-when-you-want-food" thing.

Signed,
The stingy person who won't share her food

My cat loves tomatoes. Go figure. Turns his nose up at most fish.

[Dogmama]

Yes; it is difficult, and I'm in denial to some degree. He's just turning 12 now, and I keep hoping that he'll be one of those cats who lives to be 20. He's mostly a really robust cat, but when he gets sick, he really gets sick....from something we haven't been able to identify. The best I can do is offer him good preventative care and keep his stress level down if at all possible. So far, all his labs, e.g., kidney and thyroid function, look good. It's his immune system I worry about.


((((Henry & Indy)))))

Been there with a dog. Wish they could talk!!!

[indysteel]

((((Henry & Indy)))))

Been there with a dog. Wish they could talk!!!

I do wish they could talk, although I suppose one of the reasons that I love animals is that they can't. There's less potential for conflict that way. Plus, DH and I would lose out on all the fun we have impersonating them. We have these super silly "conversations" with the cats. Please don't tell anyone...... :p

[Sardine]

Dear Henry: I'm so glad your fever has broken. I hope it stays that way. I'm sorry, buddy, but you're going to have to stay at the vet a bit longer until Daddy can pick you up this evening. Think of it this way: at least at the vet, your sister isn't there to beat you up. You know how she is when you come home from the vet. And, yes, I am going to reschedule your teeth cleaning. You aren't getting off that easy.

Please, please, please stay healthy from now on. I know you're getting older, but I can't bear the thought of losing you. I was so sad when we lost your big sister, but you know you're my special boy. I've never loved anything quite like you.

indysteel, sorry to hear that your boy's been poorly but hopefully he's on the mend now.

[indysteel]

Thanks, Sardine. I'm hoping he's on the mend. We were gone on vacation when he must have gotten sick. The pet sitter really didn't pick up on it though, I think because he had just enough energy to greet her at the door and then sit on her lap for some pets.

[zoom-zoom]

I do wish they could talk, although I suppose one of the reasons that I love animals is that they can't. There's less potential for conflict that way. Plus, DH and I would lose out on all the fun we have impersonating them. We have these super silly "conversations" with the cats. Please don't tell anyone...... :p

Our cats all have different voices and accents. :o

I hope Henry is all better. We're watching our nearly 18 year old Lola start to really decline. It's so difficult. We saw her come into the world (a former roommate's trampy kitty was Lola's mama)...so she's really like our child. I dread losing her, but know that it's not likely that she will see 2012 at this point. That makes me really sad. :(

[indysteel]

I'm so sorry, Zoom-Zoom. There's very little you can do it make it any easier. It's the price we pay for having these wonderful creatures in our lives. I know it's a price worth paying, but it sucks all the same.

[bmccasland]

Zoom-Zoom, I'm so sorry. I was where you are with two of my kitties last year. Christmas was difficult. :(


Dear Chloe,
Thank you for re-teaching me about the laws of physics. Specifically about an equal and opposite reaction. Oh, and things in motion tend to stay in motion. So I zap you with the squirt bottle to keep you out of the vase of flowers, and in your haste to vacate the counter, you knock the vase over. :rolleyes: But we'll see if you stay out of the vase now. I'm glad you like the paper bag. Yes, I'll replace Squirrel this weekend. Two more days. ;)

[spokewench]

For a couple of months, I had a suspicion that another cat was sneaking in the house and eating Jag's dry food. And, lo and behold, I came home yesterday from playing tennis and I was home for a bit; fed Jag his wet food, took a shower, etc. and finally was getting ready to sit down to eat my soup and boom, I hear this incredible growling and hissing and commotion coming from the back bedroom (All Jag, he is really loud when he is mad).

I went back there thinking he had a mouse cause he growls loud when he catches a mouse and there under the bed hiding is another black kitty. I've seen this lady cat a few times in the last few days outside our house. I took Jag into another room and she let herself out but not before she lost her collar. Her name is Samantha. I called the number on the collar to tell her owner that I have her collar, but no call back yet.

I sure hope she is not a stray or lost! She is not friendly and runs like heck when you get near her.

[indysteel]

Dear Henry, enough is enough, buddy. I need you to get better. I wish we could figure out what's ailing you. The blood/urine work will be back tomorrow, but it would be swell if you were all better by then. I'm otherwise going to remain a nervous wreck.

Dear Izzy, I know you're full of Izziness today, but your big brother doesn't want to play. I'm sorry, sweatpea.

[Biciclista]

Dear Aggie
I am so happy that you are no longer howling at night. It took over a month but you've finally gotten it.
YAY!
your unfurry mommy

[owlice]

Dear Little Cat,

I really wish you'd stop presenting the southbound end of your northbound body when you jump up on the bed. That's not your best side; whoever might have told you so was wrong.

Thanks for your future cooperation.

The woman who feeds you

[winddance]

Dear Mira,

Darling, I know you're a rocket-scientist type and I really do sense the worry on your face at the sudden cancellation of whatever it is you were planning when I show up at home off-schedule. I know you believe you've found the means to your plan for world domination, but your obsession with screens has got to be toned down.

I bought "Game for Cats" for you as a toy, which you and your not-brother seem to enjoy. But "Game for Cats" is only SOMETIMES on the screen of the iPad. It is NOT on my phone, in the laptop, or in my paperback. Paperbacks don't even have screens, even though they look like a Kindle app.

I'm sorry to get in the way of your plans, but I can only give you use of the iPad sometimes and only under my supervision. I do not want to find it on the floor when I come home. It is unnecessary to force your paws underneath it while I am using it. I am sure it loves you too, but repeated head-butting makes it difficult to read. When I am using it, I am not playing, "Game for Cats."

I'm sure you understand.

Love,
Your adoring mother

[jessmarimba]

Dear Mira,

Darling, I know you're a rocket-scientist type and I really do sense the worry on your face at the sudden cancellation of whatever it is you were planning when I show up at home off-schedule. I know you believe you've found the means to your plan for world domination, but your obsession with screens has got to be toned down.

I bought "Game for Cats" for you as a toy, which you and your not-brother seem to enjoy. But "Game for Cats" is only SOMETIMES on the screen of the iPad. It is NOT on my phone, in the laptop, or in my paperback. Paperbacks don't even have screens, even though they look like a Kindle app.

I'm sorry to get in the way of your plans, but I can only give you use of the iPad sometimes and only under my supervision. I do not want to find it on the floor when I come home. It is unnecessary to force your paws underneath it while I am using it. I am sure it loves you too, but repeated head-butting makes it difficult to read. When I am using it, I am not playing, "Game for Cats."

I'm sure you understand.

Love,
Your adoring mother

Hahaha. We play "Pocket Pond" on my iPhone. It's just a little pond that makes splashing noises when you touch it and these little fish swim around and around. It's absolutely fascinating...if you're furry.

[Catrin]

....I'm sorry to get in the way of your plans, but I can only give you use of the iPad sometimes and only under my supervision. I do not want to find it on the floor when I come home. It is unnecessary to force your paws underneath it while I am using it. I am sure it loves you too, but repeated head-butting makes it difficult to read. When I am using it, I am not playing, "Game for Cats."

I'm sure you understand.

Love,
Your adoring mother

Thank you for the belly laugh you just gave me while I envisioned all of this, thank you :)

[Brandi]

Dear Aki,
Why do you put your toy's in the toilet? It's gross!

[Biciclista]

she thinks she's a raccoon, she's washing them.

[Sardine]

@Brandi & Biciclista - Thanks for making me nearly choke on my coffee due to laughing.

[Dogmama]

...snort...!

[Brandi]

And she put's my hair bands in the toilet too!

[jessmarimba]

Dear cats -

Thank you for all curling up in bed with me and adding some heat on this nasty afternoon. Even though I know two of you are here to cuddle and the third one is only here to make trouble (no, you aren't having any of my tortilla chips. I know you like them, but you'll leave crumbs all over my bed since you chew with your mouth open!)

Sincerely,
Icicle mom

[skhill]

Dear greedy boy

There's a can of food in one hand and your plate in the other-- breakfast is on the way. Yelling at me as loud as you can isn't going to make it come any faster! Shhh, it's only 5 am and we don't want to wake up the whole neighborhood...

Love, the can-opener

[skhill]

Dear junior cat

Yes, with our dog's death the pet heirarchy needs adjustment. But remember, even though you're all grown up now, you are still the smallest and youngest member of the household. As we've seen, senior cat is not interesting in giving up his position just yet. And don't forget that senior cat is six pounds heavier than you. Hang in there, you won't be junior forever, you just need to wait 5-10 years....

Love, the referee

[makbike]

Dear Figaroe,

Could you please stop howling at the top of your lungs at 1 a.m. 2 a.m.,3 a.m. etc. At 1 a.m. I got up and put you in your room with your bowl of food, closed the door and went back to bed. At 1:15 a.m. I hear you howling and banging on the door. I crawled out of bed, opened the door, put your food away and it starts over at 2 a.m. Now, we know you are not hyperthyroid as you were treated for this 7 years ago. Thyroid check last week was fine! Are you afraid of the dark? Do you have kitty Alzheimer's? Could we please have a night of solid sleep?

Your beloved humans!

[bmccasland]

Dear Chloe Kitten,
I am not your enemy, really. But you do need to take your meds. Dr. C and I are trying to help your lungs clear and get you to feeling better.

Dear Gods of KittyKats - please don't let Chloe have chronic lung problems. I already went through this with Erin Cat. :( She's up there with you, she can tell you all about it.

Sign me,
Worried Mom

[indysteel]

(((Beth and Chloe))). I hope she starts cooperating and gets better soon.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Dear Cat,

I don't know who took you into the lift when you were sniffing around our lift lobby and took you to basement 3 where you were found 12 hours later with the holy c**p beaten out of you by another cat. But if I find that person, and there HAS to be a person involved considering how the lift is the only way to get there and you are pathologically afraid of the lift, I will beat the stuffing out of him/her. I hope your little kitty mind is loopy with sedatives and painkillers at the vet while they stitch your lip up and let your missing claw heal. And that you get to eat something in the IV. And also, that you start peeing soon. When you come home, I'll cook you some shrimp.

Love,
Your Tante

Makbike, my mother actually swears that our cat is afraid of the dark and leaves nightlights all over the house for him. You could try that with your kitty. :D

[skywalkerbeth]

Dear Kitty

You are on my lap, and I am petting you. Just because I am not looking at you as I pet you is not a reason to rise up, meow and paw my face.

Sincerely, the person who is never more than a foot or two away.

[skywalkerbeth]

Hahaha. We play "Pocket Pond" on my iPhone. It's just a little pond that makes splashing noises when you touch it and these little fish swim around and around. It's absolutely fascinating...if you're furry.

ooooh, thank you - it's free!

[VeganBikeChick]

Dear Laverne,

You have now lost your "going out when I take the trash out" privileges. Running to the other end of the building and expecting me to chase you, then running the opposite way to the other end of the building is not amusing.

Signed,
The person who will be locking you in the bathroom during trash removal from now on.

[pll]

Dear Kitty

You are on my lap, and I am petting you. Just because I am not looking at you as I pet you is not a reason to rise up, meow and paw my face.

Sincerely, the person who is never more than a foot or two away.

Priceless! :D

[marni]

Priceless! :D

Ahh... he/she is just reaching up to give you love pats and stroke your cheek. My maine coon does that all of the time and I find it so sweet.

marni

[azfiddle]

Dear Rory,

Welcome to our family. You're adjusting perfectly and I can't believe you're already friends with Sasha, our dog!

[Biciclista]

congrats on the new fur child, Azfiddle!! they match! (the cat and the dog)

[azfiddle]

Yes, they really are a good pair. I am amazed that they are so compatible in such a short time- but then the dog was trained by the two previous cats....

[Catrin]

Awww, such a sweet photo!

Since I can't have a cat, I have considered getting something like a hamster but somehow that doesn't sound like a good replacement...It isn't like they can roam the apartment, interact with me, nor curl up on my lap and purr. I am sure they probably do interact but not in the same way a cat does.

[skywalkerbeth]

Ahh... he/she is just reaching up to give you love pats and stroke your cheek. My maine coon does that all of the time and I find it so sweet.

marni

No, I know. I think it's sweet too. She REALLY loves her Mommy. It's just funny that I am RIGHT there, petting her, but since I'm not looking at her it means I'm ignoring her.

[Becky]

Since I can't have a cat, I have considered getting something like a hamster but somehow that doesn't sound like a good replacement...It isn't like they can roam the apartment, interact with me, nor curl up on my lap and purr. I am sure they probably do interact but not in the same way a cat does.

How about a rabbit? :D

[feral1]

Awww, such a sweet photo!

Since I can't have a cat, I have considered getting something like a hamster but somehow that doesn't sound like a good replacement...It isn't like they can roam the apartment, interact with me, nor curl up on my lap and purr. I am sure they probably do interact but not in the same way a cat does.

Rats make really great pets :D The shelters are usually loaded with them.They are like tiny little dogs and they have unique personalities and love to play. My 4 boys wrestle with my fingers and just hang on the side of the cage when they hear me come home from work......waiting for a treat. The only downside is that they only live 2-4 years. It's hard when they go cause I do get attached to the little fuzz butts but there are always more in need of rescue!

[Biciclista]

I think a rat's a better pet than a rabbit... and 100 times better than a hamster.

[owlice]

Gerbils are great pets. They do best with some gerbil company, are fun as heck to watch (especially after their cage/habitat has been cleaned), will respond if you play with them/hand train them, and are easy to care for. And they are really cute. My son had gerbils when he was small; they were a lot of fun.

And if you get a bunch of cages/habitats, reconfiguring the gerbil abode becomes an interesting engineering project! :D We had nine cages in all, and would have has many as eight at a time making up the gerbil complex. (We always kept at least one cage separate in case of illness/need to transport/stashing for the complex cleaning spree.) Lots of tubes and levels and places for the gerbils to be. :)

I have a friend who used to have rats as pets and liked them a lot. (Now she has cats, so ... no rats.) But gerbils... are definitely cuter!

[feral1]

Gerbils are great pets. They do best with some gerbil company, are fun as heck to watch (especially after their cage/habitat has been cleaned), will respond if you play with them/hand train them, and are easy to care for. And they are really cute. My son had gerbils when he was small; they were a lot of fun.

And if you get a bunch of cages/habitats, reconfiguring the gerbil abode becomes an interesting engineering project! :D We had nine cages in all, and would have has many as eight at a time making up the gerbil complex. (We always kept at least one cage separate in case of illness/need to transport/stashing for the complex cleaning spree.) Lots of tubes and levels and places for the gerbils to be. :)

I have a friend who used to have rats as pets and liked them a lot. (Now she has cats, so ... no rats.) But gerbils... are definitely cuter!

I'll admit gerbils are cute but rats have more personality.:D They also need to have friends of the same sex to keep them company or they become depressed.

[Owlie]

I want a pet rat! I don't think the management would approve, and I think it would freak out my boyfriend, though. :(

Azfiddle, Rory looks like DBF's cat, only Pooh has more white on his face. Congrats on the new kitty!

[jessmarimba]

Dear psychocat:

Would you just chill? I don't understand how one five-pound critter can make so much noise! And neither do the other two cats. If you keep that up you're getting shut out of the bedroom tonight.

P.S. If you're acting up because of the snowstorm, we're in for a looooong winter.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Dear cat, I thought all cats LIKED smelly fishy food? I know you have a tooth gone now, but the vets at the hospital said you ate canned food great! And you HAVE to eat this one because there's your dose of antibiotics mixed in and if you don't eat it you're gonna have a fever again and back you go to the hospital where you'll have that cage above the crazy high strung sausage dog and DO YOU REALLY WANT THAT?!?!?! :confused:

[skhill]

Dear cat, I thought all cats LIKED smelly fishy food? I know you have a tooth gone now, but the vets at the hospital said you ate canned food great! And you HAVE to eat this one because there's your dose of antibiotics mixed in and if you don't eat it you're gonna have a fever again and back you go to the hospital where you'll have that cage above the crazy high strung sausage dog and DO YOU REALLY WANT THAT?!?!?! :confused:

Hope your little one is cooperating and feeling better! I've given up on trying to hide pills in cat food-- these days, it's just grab the cat and stuff the pill down his throat and make sure it isn't spit out. Too bad your vet doesn't have a separate area for cats!

[alexis_the_tiny]

Apparently, this cat would not touch wet food for his life. I gave up this morning and stuffed the pill down his throat with the good old blowing on nose trick. Despite having only three cracked canines left, he's demanding his kibble and refusing to have anything to do with that Science diet high calorie prescription stuff. And the vets swore he was an angel and ate all the canned food they gave him. HAH. :rolleyes:

[bmccasland]

Hope your little one is cooperating and feeling better! I've given up on trying to hide pills in cat food-- these days, it's just grab the cat and stuff the pill down his throat and make sure it isn't spit out. Too bad your vet doesn't have a separate area for cats!


Apparently, this cat would not touch wet food for his life. I gave up this morning and stuffed the pill down his throat with the good old blowing on nose trick. Despite having only three cracked canines left, he's demanding his kibble and refusing to have anything to do with that Science diet high calorie prescription stuff. And the vets swore he was an angel and ate all the canned food they gave him. HAH. :rolleyes:

Thanks for reminding me that I have to pill Chloe this evening. :rolleyes: Chloe and Calypso have been at a pet hotel all week while I was out on a business trip, and are currently wandering around the house meowing most pittifully, with time outs for chasing each other.

[marni]

I seriously suspect that the canned food at the vets has "good stuff in it" since my cats eat wet food like hogs when they are kenneled but won't ouch it at home. Maybe it's when in rome syndrome.

My old cat Cappy had some horrible jaw infections as a baby before I got him and as a result had to have all but one rear incisor, his 4 canines and the nipping teeth in the front removed when he was 2. He quite happily crunched dry food until his death last year at 19 years old.

marni

[alexis_the_tiny]

Marni, ok, now I'm wondering what is in the canned food at the vet's. They sold me the exact same stuff so I could feed him at home.

Beth, good luck. I just received big ole claw across my chest this morning for trying to pill him. Yeowza :mad:

[Thorn]

Marni, ok, now I'm wondering what is in the canned food at the vet's. They sold me the exact same stuff so I could feed him at home.

Beth, good luck. I just received big ole claw across my chest this morning for trying to pill him. Yeowza :mad:

Greenies pill pockets have worked for me (until the cat learned to eat the pocket and leave the pill behind). Well, and then we discovered the gluten connection.

Now it is the mix it with wet food for the boy's daily meds. Some days it can become quite the war of wills. When he gets stubborn, I sprinkle a little bonito flakes on top of his food. He loves them and that usually gets him to eat it. You can buy them in pet stores as a cat treat or for about 1/4 the price in the asian section of your grocery store.

[bmccasland]

I had the pill on the end-table in the living room. Chloe jumps up for some petting, snoozes, gets more petting, pop the pill, more petting, snoozes some more, then, OH LOOK Calypso needs chasing!

It's the morning pill which is more difficult, I don't have time to sit and wait. Fortunately her current Rx is a pill every 3 days.

[skhill]

Dear cats,
Would y'all be okay with having a new doggy sister? I met a nice young dog at the humane society; I'm sure she'd enjoy playing with you. But you'll have to teach her to respect you; your claws will come in handy for that. We can put up the gate to stairs, so you can have a dog-free space, if you like. Let me know what you think!

[bmccasland]

Dear cats,
Would y'all be okay with having a new doggy sister? I met a nice young dog at the humane society; I'm sure she'd enjoy playing with you. But you'll have to teach her to respect you; your claws will come in handy for that. We can put up the gate to stairs, so you can have a dog-free space, if you like. Let me know what you think!

I think the kitties will vote "NO!" but adopt the doggy anyway. They'll get over it. I miss walking a dog.

[alexis_the_tiny]

I think the kitties will vote "NO!" but adopt the doggy anyway. They'll get over it. I miss walking a dog.

+1 for getting the doggy! The cats will get over it pretty soon. :D

[bmccasland]

Dear Chloe,
I'm glad you're feeling better, really, I am... but do you have to lie on the laptop keyboard, and my hands and look over your shoulder at the screen?

I wish someone was around to photograph this:
Notebook computer open on a lap desk.
Chloe lieing on her side, under left hand, head on right hand, belly towards me, her right side is up. She then roll her head looking over her right shoulder, so she's looking at the screen upside down.

At least she's breathing better. :rolleyes:

[skhill]

Dear cats,
Would y'all be okay with having a new doggy sister? I met a nice young dog at the humane society; I'm sure she'd enjoy playing with you. But you'll have to teach her to respect you; your claws will come in handy for that. We can put up the gate to stairs, so you can have a dog-free space, if you like. Let me know what you think!

Went to visit Xandra on Sunday afternoon, and now I'm sure she's not the right dog for us. With all the people and chaos at that time, she was a different dog, totally keyed up and hyper. Maybe that's why she's been up for adoption for over 6 months... Anyway, sooner or later the cats will have to deal with a dog joining our household, but not quite yet.

[Becky]

Went to visit Xandra on Sunday afternoon, and now I'm sure she's not the right dog for us. With all the people and chaos at that time, she was a different dog, totally keyed up and hyper. Maybe that's why she's been up for adoption for over 6 months... Anyway, sooner or later the cats will have to deal with a dog joining our household, but not quite yet.

It's a hard call, deciding if a dog is a good fit. Living in a shelter is tough, and sometimes the dogs don't "show" well as a result. Is there a shelter staff member or volunteer who can give you more insight into her personality? Maybe you can visit with her somewhere quieter? Very often, the two can give a more realistic view of the dog.

Good luck!

[redrhodie]

Dear Twiggy,

Thanks for always escorting me into the bathroom. I feel much safer.

[marni]

Dear Twiggy,

Thanks for always escorting me into the bathroom. I feel much safer.

you never know when you might fall into the toilet and the kitty needs to be there to save you.

Both of mine just sit and stare. It can be disconcerting, but mostly its just funny .

marni

[Owlie]

DBF's cat doesn't like closed doors. This includes bathroom doors. He'll come in and stare. I inevitably hear DBF saying something like "Dammit, cat, I don't stare at you while you're on your litterbox!" He also insists on staring while the bathroom occupant is taking a shower.
I just tell DBF that at least the cat doesn't look up and go "Ooh, dangly things!" with claws out...

[Possegal]

My Bailey (the avatar) never let me go in the bathroom alone. And loved to sit on my lap when I was, well, using the bathroom. I've gotta say - I kind of miss that crazy habit. My two new ones want to come in with me, but not so much wanting to sit on my lap.

[marni]

Tux the maine coon insists on a five minute cuddle on his back in my arms when I hit the toilet first thing in the morning. The issue is further complicated by the fact that miss ike insists on racing in and getting a drink out of the toilet first. Following this little exercise, they each pick a sink and insist that the taps drip while they drink and play with the water ehile I am getting dressed. When I come in to turn off the taps they know it is breakfast time and tear off into the kitchen and clalim their spots.

I love their little kitty rituals.

marni

[Blueberry]

Dear Cats:

I know your dad is out of town and that I'm a poor substitute. But - did you really have to eat my test knit and string yarn all over the house in the 10 minutes I left you alone to chop up veggies for dinner? I'm already feeling cruddy from a flu shot and a messed up ankle - your predecessors would have made me feel better. Please grow up already!

[Bethany1]

Dear Bandit,

I know Buttons has just come back from the vet. Quit growling and hissing at her as she has "vet smell". She's been spayed and doesn't feel good. You weren't a happy cat when I got you taken care of either.

Also, drinking chocolate milk with your paw while I'm typing is not allowed even though I know it's your favorite.

[alexis_the_tiny]

Dear kitty kat, you can stop hiding under the couch now. This morning's antibiotics was the last dose. Tomorrow, your stitches come out and you'll be fine. Besides, your vet did a pretty darn good job of repairing your face. Animal plastic surgery at it's finest, really.

[bmccasland]

Dear Chloe,
The computer screen's mouse arrow is NOT a bug that you must attack. Further, despite your penchant for lying across my right and and putting your paw on the keyboard, it will not make the arrow bug play with you. I know you're special, but I do like to communicate with the outside world.

Love,
your Mom

[skhill]

Dear cats

I'm so sorry that our new dog has decided that chasing you guys is great fun. We're working on discouraging it. Meanwhile, I'll think you'll find the baby-gate will let you have the upstairs all to yourselves. Give it some time, and I'm sure you guys and Stella will be friends.

Love, your protector

PS you all were so brave to come downstairs for your breakfast today!

[ursalilah]

Dear Miles,

We are all very impressed with the fact that you seem to have been taking lessons in Parkour. You're very acrobatic; you amuse and impress everyone who comes by to visit and I never get tired of seeing you bounce off the walls, doors, cabinetry and furniture. I just have one request: Would you please, please, please try to keep your activities confined to the hours when we're awake? It's very hard to sleep thinking that someone is breaking into the house at 2 am.

Thanks!

Your humble servants.

[Blueberry]

Kitty Parkour - I love it!

[ursalilah]

I've never seen anything like it. He's wild! It used to be that he did Parkour right after he ate, but now he does it at all times of day and night. He seems to also like to show off when we have guests and he'll do 5-6 moves in a row. I really need to get it on video.

[owlice]

Dear Little Cat,

I don't know what you did while you were outside, but you stink! I wish you'd chosen to clean yourself somewhere other than my bed.

Also, if I'm on the toilet, I'm going to be needing the sink in short order; my sitting down in the smallest room in the house should not be your cue to jump into the sink to curl up for a nap.

Holding my nose,

The woman who feeds you

[bmccasland]

Dear Chloe,
I really do need to balance the checkbook. I appreciate your help, but please move your lovely butt.

[makbike]

Dear Thor T. Kitty,

Do you think it is necessary to throw yourself at the wall each morning when the school bus passes by the front door? I am sorry the white strobe atop the bus dances on the living room wall and taunts you. Please refrain from climbing the walls, literally.

Love you,
Your persons

[makbike]

Dear Dickens,

Is it really necessary to steal a frosted mini-wheats from my ceral bowl each morning? I know the little square make a great hockey puck and you enjoy your game of hockey each morning. Congratulations, I know several goals have been scored this week!

Your breakfast buddy,
M.

[skhill]

Dear cats,

Please check my translation from what you were telling me this cold morning:
The furnace is the one true god; the space heaters are her prophets; the electric blanket is a site of holy pilgramage.

Love,
she who controls the thermostat

[Biciclista]

Dear Aggie thanks for being so absolutely sweet two nights ago when I was so bereft. Now can't you act like that every night?

what this silly cat does that drives me crazy is she likes to get into bed with me... sometimes she is just a perfect little hot pad, other times she kneads. but she kneads FAST and she MUST have skin contact. So she goes for my throat. nothing less sleep inducing than a cat poking you rapidly in the throat. I try and put blankets or pillow between us, but she's better than a heat seeking missle. i don't know how to turn that off. heh

[indysteel]

Sophie used to chew on my head in the middle of the night. Ouch!

I miss sleeping with Henry. Beyond his penchant for licking whatever book(s) I had on my bedside table, he was a good snuggler. DH was and remains opposed to having the cats sleep with us. I suppose it's for the best. Izzy has the loudest motor I've ever heard on a cat and it only stops if she's totally asleep.

[Biciclista]

oh yes,
Dear Aggie, yes, it's really cute when you knock stuff off the dresser, one by one. But could you just do it in the daylight?
Don't MAKE me clean my dresser off.

[Owlie]

oh yes,
Dear Aggie, yes, it's really cute when you knock stuff off the dresser, one by one. But could you just do it in the daylight?
Don't MAKE me clean my dresser off.

She's just making sure gravity still works in the dark. You can never be too sure, you know! :D

[snapdragen]

Dear cats,

Please check my translation from what you were telling me this cold morning:
The furnace is the one true god; the space heaters are her prophets; the electric blanket is a site of holy pilgramage.

Love,
she who controls the thermostat

This is too cute. :p

[marni]

Sophie used to chew on my head in the middle of the night. Ouch!

r

Miss Ike sleeps curled around my head and wakes up 2 or 3 times a night to give me a good head cleaning. Her little tongue sure is sharp though. I swear she is trying to see how many cowlicks she can make stand up straight. Kitty bed head is very creative if somewhat uncomfortable in the process!

Tux is a good snuggler as long as he can get his forehead press into the crook of my neck and his left paw stuffed into my right ear as an ear plug.

marni

[owlice]

Dear Little Cat,

Yours does stink, indeed, and very powerfully at that.

Not breathing,

The woman who feeds you (and is at the moment rethinking that, considering the results)

[colby]

Dear Mo,

It doesn't count if you're standing in the box, and still your poop falls outside of it. The Onion is satire, not suggestion.

sincerely,
Proud Owner Of Princess.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/freethinking-cat-shits-outside-the-box,8945/

[makbike]

Dear Cats,

The new puppy is a wonderful addition to our family. I promise you she (the new puppy) is not a monster! Figaroe, Thor T. Kitty and Dickens you were very brave today when you came out of the closets and ventured into the kitchen to look a the puppy.

Be Brave and Patient,
Your Humans

[zoom-zoom]

Dear Cats,

The new puppy is a wonderful addition to our family. I promise you she (the new puppy) is not a monster! Figaroe, Thor T. Kitty and Dickens you were very brave today when you came out of the closets and ventured into the kitchen to look a the puppy.

Be Brave and Patient,
Your Humans

You have a kitty named Thor, too? :)

[makbike]

Zoom-Zoom,

Here is the run down on the 4 legged creatures presently in our home:

Cats:
Figaroe, Churchill, Penelope, Twister, Thor T. Kitty, Mars, Snickers, Dickens

Dogs:
Gaston, Zorro, Harper, Marcie

Other:

Zephyr the chinchilla

[lauraelmore1033]

Dear kitties,
thanks for always making sure to drop a big steaming bomb in time for us to enjoy during EVERY meal, no matter how often I scoop.

[owlice]

Dear Little Cat,

You're not allowed on the counters and tables. I don't know why, suddenly, you seem to think you are, but you're not, not now, not ever.

Signed,

The woman who feeds you

[skhill]

Dear little cat,

Why is it that you are eager to interact with the dog in the kitchen, but are scared of her everywhere else in the house? You were head-butting her and rubbing up against her and even licking her feet in the kitchen, but you won't even enter the living room if she's there. You are so strange....

Love, your mystified human servant

[Catrin]

Dear little cat,

Why is it that you are eager to interact with the dog in the kitchen, but are scared of her everywhere else in the house? You were head-butting her and rubbing up against her and even licking her feet in the kitchen, but you won't even enter the living room if she's there. You are so strange....

Love, your mystified human servant

Perhaps they have decided that since food comes from that room that it is the "truce" zone? :)

[jessmarimba]

Dear cats:

I give you food and water. I scoop your poop. I provide a cozy place (and a heat source) for all of you to curl up and sleep comfortably at night. Critter, I even feed and water your friends on the outside.

Will one of you take a break from spying on the neighbors and pleeeeeaaaaasssseeeee go refill my cider so I don't have to get off the couch?

[owlice]

Dear Little Cat,

I DO NOT WANT YOUR BUTT THAT CLOSE TO MY FACE! MOVE!!

Thank you,

The woman who feeds you

[bmccasland]

Dear Chloe and Calypso,
Where did you put the bathroom sink's drain plug? It was in it's proper place this morning after I brushed my teeth and left for work. How did you get it out of there anyway? You have a whole basket of toys, why yank the drain plug thingy? :rolleyes:

Your Mom,
who keeps you in kibble and catnip

[jessmarimba]

Dear cat owners:

Who wants to take a bet on how long Critter's first Christmas tree is going to last? Considering that he currently 1) bites everything that fits in his mouth, 2) chases everything that can be made to move, and 3) breaks everything he can knock over?

[Owlie]

Dear boyfriend's cat:
Your being in front of the pantry != automatic receipt of kitty treats.
Stop complaining when you don't get them. I can hear you all the way over here.

[Atlas]

Dear Frisbee,
I understand how wonderful the Christmas tree is. I choose to enjoy it from a distance, not from within it as you prefer. However you choose to view it, please oh please, just don't eat it.

Love,
the girl who dangles the toys

[bmccasland]

Dear cat owners:

Who wants to take a bet on how long Critter's first Christmas tree is going to last? Considering that he currently 1) bites everything that fits in his mouth, 2) chases everything that can be made to move, and 3) breaks everything he can knock over?


Dear Frisbee,
I understand how wonderful the Christmas tree is. I choose to enjoy it from a distance, not from within it as you prefer. However you choose to view it, please oh please, just don't eat it.

Love,
the girl who dangles the toys

I've been pondering these same thoughts. Chloe Kitteh is in the "everything R my toys" stage.
Which is why I haven't put up the Christmas tree yet.

[azfiddle]

Rory-

Just a reminder: you are not a dog. Just because you like chasing the big dog toys, like to sleep in the dog's bed, and like the dog's jerky treats so much that we had to block the cupboard so you can't get to them, you are actually a cat, so please eat your own food which is provided in the dog-free room.

Thank you-
the management.

[laura*]

Dear outdoor cat who's selected my down-the-street neighbors as its servants:

The scary workshop assistants are gone: The older RV dweller got fired; and the couch surfer, boudoir surfer, quasi-homeless slacker kid did too. It's now safe to hang out around their house. Please come around more often.

Actually, I wish you'd come as far as my house. My friends will be moving next summer, and then what will you do?

[missjean]

Dear Cat,
Where do you go all day? You are not allowed outside, and this house is not that big. I am all over this house, upstairs, basement, living room, den, office, all day and never see you. Then at 6:30 pm, poof, there you are, wanting your back scratched.

Signed,
One of the people who feeds you.

[jessmarimba]

I've been pondering these same thoughts. Chloe Kitteh is in the "everything R my toys" stage.
Which is why I haven't put up the Christmas tree yet.

Mine is artificial and pre-lit. So it's standing, with lights on, but nothing else. Yesterday I came home after 13 hours at work and one whole side of the tree was flat. Not sure if they climbed it or tipped it into the wall and it self-righted (the stand is very heavy!).

I'm debating a box of cheap plastic ornaments or just leaving it plain and lit. Maybe I'll make paper snowflakes and do tinsel and leave it at that?

[Becky]

I'm debating a box of cheap plastic ornaments or just leaving it plain and lit. Maybe I'll make paper snowflakes and do tinsel and leave it at that?

We bought cheap shatterproof ones (which actually look really nice) for the bottom third :D Fortunately, our cat-monsters didn't climb the tree last year (knock wood!), so the nice ornaments near the top were ok.

I wouldn't do tinsel with a cat-monster who eats everything....sounds like a recipe for an emergency trip to the vet. :eek:

[indysteel]

Thankfully, our young cat really only seems to care about the tree skirt. We don't even try to keep it around the tree at this point. She enjoys playing with it too much. Still, we don't put anything breakable on the lower branches, and we secured the tree with a rope knotted around an otherwise well secured curtain rod. A number of years ago, I had a tree that I decorated solely with little white lights and velvet bows that tied around the branches on the off chance that my then-young Sophie Kitty would destroy it. The tree was plain but pretty and there were no emergency trips to the vet.

[Becky]

Thankfully, our young cat really only seems to care about the tree skirt.

Ours too! They love to sleep on it, roll up in it, and hide under it. I can't for the life of me figure out why the tree skirt is more fun than a blanket :confused::)

[indysteel]

Ours too! They love to sleep on it, roll up in it, and hide under it. I can't for the life of me figure out why the tree skirt is more fun than a blanket :confused::)

At least at our house, the tree skirts moved across the hardwoods a bit better than your average blanket. She often does a flying leap onto them so that they'll skirt (pun intended) across the floor.

DH took some adorable pictures of our kitten playing with the tree skirt the other day; I'll have to post them.

[zoom-zoom]

We couldn't have our pre-lit artificial tree up for 2 years. Young crazy cat wouldn't leave it alone. The first Christmas we had him he was maybe 8 months old. He took one look at that tree and took a flying leap. 5 minutes after putting it up we took it down. The next year he was still insane, so we didn't put it up.

He has calmed-down considerably, especially in the past year. So now we don't worry about it. Last year we put it up and he would lay under it for hours looking up at the lights. I don't think he even batted at a single ornament.

[Catrin]

At least at our house, the tree skirts moved across the hardwoods a bit better than your average blanket. She often does a flying leap onto them so that they'll skirt (pun intended) across the floor.

DH took some adorable pictures of our kitten playing with the tree skirt the other day; I'll have to post them.

I just pictured this, it made me laugh out loud, thanks for the mental image. Looking forward to the pictures :)

[indysteel]

I'm a Luddite, so I hope I attached this image correctly. This is Izzy under the tree skirt. In my humble opinion, she is the cutest kitten ever.

http://forums.teamestrogen.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=13982&stc=1&d=1323198787

[indysteel]

Help! Why is the picture so big and why is it attached as a thumbnail, too? I knew I should have waited for DH to help me!

[Catrin]

Awwwww, she is just adorable and looks SO much like your avatar! She is the spitting image of your beloved Henry (if I remember the name correctly).

[indysteel]

Awwwww, she is just adorable and looks SO much like your avatar! She is the spitting image of your beloved Henry (if I remember the name correctly).

Thanks! Henry is my avatar. He's bigger and more of a buff color. Izzy is more orange and has a perma-kitten quality about her. Personality-wise, Izzy is a trouble maker, while Henry is a love bug.

[Becky]

That is an excellent photo, Indy!

[bmccasland]

Just want to you know that y'all are scaring me. Chloe is 7-8 mo old..:rolleyes:
Still debating whether or not a tree will go up at my house. It is artificial, with lights, so maybe I'll start with just the tree...

[VeganBikeChick]

Indy, I love that photo of Izzy! That'd be an awesome Xmas card :D

[indysteel]

Just want to you know that y'all are scaring me. Chloe is 7-8 mo old..:rolleyes:
Still debating whether or not a tree will go up at my house. It is artificial, with lights, so maybe I'll start with just the tree...

We put our tree up last year when Izzy was about that age and she didn't bother the tree at all. Again, it was the tree skirt that she fixated on, although we did make sure to hang breakables up high and tightly secure any hooks. We also kept a spray bottle of water handy to squirt her if she did mess with the tree itself.

[marni]

we are used to keeping the lower third of the tree bare of everything but lights and don't mind putting down several layers of tree skirts (tablecloths and colored sheets) for the kitties to play in on and under, they love lurking underneath, especially if there are prezzies to leap over around or "accidentally" knock out to skid across the hard wood floor, as they jump out and attack passing ankles, and small dogs. Poor
Weena the corgie was so terrorized last year that she avoided coming into the front room until the tree was gone, and after we took it out, the cats were terribly irritated.

Fun times.

marni

[colby]

we are used to keeping the lower third of the tree bare of everything but lights and don't mind putting down several layers of tree skirts (tablecloths and colored sheets) for the kitties to play in on and under, they love lurking underneath, especially if there are prezzies to leap over around or "accidentally" knock out to skid across the hard wood floor, as they jump out and attack passing ankles, and small dogs. Poor
Weena the corgie was so terrorized last year that she avoided coming into the front room until the tree was gone, and after we took it out, the cats were terribly irritated.

We do the same thing - we hang "cat things" at the bottom of the tree (ornaments that can't be damaged and we don't mind them playing with - bells on strings, etc) and anything that shouldn't be touched farther up. We have an artificial tree, when we had cats and a real tree the troublemakers would climb up the middle; you can't predict that until you have seen it, though, the cats I would EXPECT to do that weren't the ones doing it. ;) We also have to move their cat tree away from the tree-tree (cat tree is 6ft, tree is 7ft) so they don't dangle off the edge of it to mess with stuff.

They do love to snuggle on the tree skirt.
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/65439_1239835852571_1729530826_453578_2455830_n.jpg

Ornaments!
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/10841_1064972441095_1729530826_129487_571287_n.jpg

What presents are good for:
https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/19057_1068974861153_1729530826_136653_3858333_n.jpg

[pll]

Indy: I love, *love* that picture. Very cute!




http://forums.teamestrogen.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=13982&stc=1&thumb=1&d=1323198787

[jessmarimba]

....And I took the tree down yesterday. I fixed a few branches when I got home from work. Went upstairs to sit down with a beer. Came back down to put the glass in the sink and the branches were flat again. Since the branches are bendable wire, they'll eventually break if they are bent and straightened repeatedly.

Dear cat - I WANT A CHRISTMAS TREE!! If I have to put it up on xmas eve and leave you locked in the garage for two days, I will. So think on that with your little goldfish brain and decide how you want this to go.

Sincerely,
Scrooge

(PS Indy that photo is adorable! Trade you cats :) )

[indysteel]

Jess, I've had good luck getting Izzy to leave stuff alone by squirting her with a bit of water. Have you tried that tactic?

[katluvr]

I am very lucky, with 6 indoor cats they do NOT bother the tree. Now they all lay underneath it at different times. I also put "cat friendly" ornaments on the lower limbs, so they can play with those and if they "knock" them off they don't break and they bat them around on the ground. Again, I am VERY lucky!

And WHY is it that cats LOVE to lay under the tree. I had just put mine up (artificial tree) and before anything was done there was a cat under the tree!

My first dear cat (no longer with us here on earth) would remove the bows from EVERY package. I could never put those tacky store bought bows (which I still use) on any package. They were her favorite toys!

K

[feral1]

I'm a Luddite, so I hope I attached this image correctly. This is Izzy under the tree skirt. In my humble opinion, she is the cutest kitten ever.

http://forums.teamestrogen.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=13982&stc=1&d=1323198787

I actually put this as the wallpaper on my computer.....it was just too cute :D
Hope you don't mind.......

[indysteel]

Certainly not; Izzy and I are extremely flattered! It's my wallpaper, too, of course!

[Catrin]

Certainly not; Izzy and I are extremely flattered! It's my wallpaper, too, of course!

Oh good, it is going to go on one, or both, of my work computers as well. Thank you! This is just adorable and makes me smile to look at it :D

[carback]

Dear Sophie,
Thank you for positioning yourself beside the Scrabble board. I was getting my butt kicked and had six vowels on my rack. Your tail swoop across the board was timed perfectly, thus ending my torture. Now, if I could only teach you how to scour the Scrabble Players’ Dictionary and find a word that incorporates the letters X, C, J, I, I, I, E.

[Owlie]

Aww, she's so cute!

[jessmarimba]

Jess, I've had good luck getting Izzy to leave stuff alone by squirting her with a bit of water. Have you tried that tactic?

I haven't actually "caught" him yet. I know who it is, because the other two know better and the branches aren't spontaneously flattening. But I'm also not home enough to really reinforce it - I'm gone 14 hours for two days and about 9 for the other 3, way too much time for a goldfish-brained 8-month old cat to forget that the tree is off-limits. Now...if I could somehow booby-trap the TREE to squirt him, I'd be all set.

[Biciclista]

To those of you who share your house with felines AND have a christmas tree.
It is NOT goldfish brained for a cat to take great delight in playing with new toys that you put in their domain. Especially indoors only cats who have NEVER seen a tree, you just put a tree in their house! Is that not heaven? 3 dimensional play field with enticing scents and DANGLY THINGS??!?!?

If I were a cat, I would be playing in that tree CONSTANTLY!

[jessmarimba]

To those of you who share your house with felines AND have a christmas tree.
It is NOT goldfish brained for a cat to take great delight in playing with new toys that you put in their domain. Especially indoors only cats who have NEVER seen a tree, you just put a tree in their house! Is that not heaven? 3 dimensional play field with enticing scents and DANGLY THINGS??!?!?

If I were a cat, I would be playing in that tree CONSTANTLY!

He has none of those excuses :) He grew up outside, and I didn't even get to put anything ON the tree! From the noise pattern, it sounded like he was leaping from the floor to halfway up the tree, then falling off. Repeatedly. He's a slow learner.

But he's goldfish-brained anyway. Attention span = 3 seconds, max. It's actually really funny to see him distracted by something in the middle of chasing something else (especially since he's getting no better at stopping, starting, or changing directions on wood floors).

[indysteel]

I have to wonder about my cats' little brains, too. None of them have really been all that interested in the Christmas tree. They can play in an empty Amazon box for hours, however. Who knows how their minds work.

[katluvr]

Currently my cat's favorite toy is a long orange sting made of t-shirt material. It is like AWESOME! My cats are definitely of the high IQ type!;)

K

[7rider]

We won't have a tree this year - but we do have cats..so no worries about cats and trees.

Okay...Gonna use this thread to ask another dumb owner question about my kittens. We finally sprouted our tub o' wheat grass for them. Grew nice and tall. Cats love to rip it out of the tub. And...that's it.

They rip it and leave it. All. Over. The. Place. :rolleyes:

Aren't they supposed to EAT this stuff? My friend's cat devours this stuff. I'll take scissors and cut up blades into their dinner - which they'll eat. But as far as actually consuming it from the plant on their own...they haven't grasped the concept yet. Zoe is closer to it than Paris (who is an idiot...love him to pieces..but he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer). But if I don't dice it up for even Zoe, she won't eat it. Their little meat-eating teeth just don't work on the plants (even the parsley I've been giving them...gotta cut it up).

Is this a trick they learn or what?

[jessmarimba]

We won't have a tree this year - but we do have cats..so no worries about cats and trees.

Okay...Gonna use this thread to ask another dumb owner question about my kittens. We finally sprouted our tub o' wheat grass for them. Grew nice and tall. Cats love to rip it out of the tub. And...that's it.

They rip it and leave it. All. Over. The. Place. :rolleyes:

Aren't they supposed to EAT this stuff? My friend's cat devours this stuff. I'll take scissors and cut up blades into their dinner - which they'll eat. But as far as actually consuming it from the plant on their own...they haven't grasped the concept yet. Zoe is closer to it than Paris (who is an idiot...love him to pieces..but he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer). But if I don't dice it up for even Zoe, she won't eat it. Their little meat-eating teeth just don't work on the plants (even the parsley I've been giving them...gotta cut it up).

Is this a trick they learn or what?

Mine have never had a problem eating off of any plant in my house. Including plastic ones. But all three of them were outside cats at one point, and two were born feral. So I might not have the best example.

[indysteel]

Currently my cat's favorite toy is a long orange sting made of t-shirt material. It is like AWESOME! My cats are definitely of the high IQ type!;)

K

LOL!

Izzy's favorites are the aforementioned Amazon box, plastic bags (which we tie in a knot for her safety, my ponytail bands, and empty edamame shells. She has a basket full of toys she totally ignores.

[Catrin]

My last cat dearly loved the belt from my robe. I finally gave in like the good trained woman I am and allowed her to have it. She just looked adorable dragging that thing all over the apartment :) Yeah, it was a lot more fun for her than those toys I bought her :rolleyes:

[skhill]

Dear junior cat,

Last night that pie was sitting uncovered on the kitchen counter so that it could cool off-- it wasn't there for you to eat. You're lucky the pie was just a test-drive of a new recipe, and not something about to be taken somewhere. It would have been hard to explain away little cat teeth marks...

But we're in agreement, that was a fantastic pie crust.

[Reesha]

I greatly enjoyed this article, cat-lovers:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/family/pets/8958012/Owner-suprised-to-find-cat-regularly-catches-bus.html

[indysteel]

That is too cute, Reesha!

[bmccasland]

Dear Chloe,
Why are you fixated on playing with the bathroom sink's plug? :confused: Bringing to bed after you dropped it in your litter box was not exactly what I wanted to wake up with. I know you like to bring your toys to bed, but that?! Now that I've cleaned it, the sink, and the floor, would you please leave it alone? You have a basket full of toys, where is squirrel, hedgie, or mouse?

The lady who keeps you in kibble
(and good luck finding the plug now, muhahaha)

[jessmarimba]

Dear D@mmit Cat:
I would be more than happy to share my cheese and summer sausage with you if I thought you planned on digesting it, but you've already reached your vomit quota for the week.

However, thanks for returning the Wii controller so I can watch Netflix again!

(PS - your stomach might feel better if you stopped eating out of the trash. Just sayin.)

[missjean]

Dear Cat,
There are two bowls with water in them. When one bowl is empty you can drink from the other bowl. They both have the exact same substance in them. You don't have to meow at me, just step 3 inches to your right and, look! more water!
Thank you.



.

[lph]

Dear Cat,

I realize now that you have a penthouse somewhere that you retire to when our abode is no longer to your liking, since you disappeared on New Year's Eve in the pouring rain, leaving your food and a set of worried owners behind, and reappeared in the wee hours dry, warm, calm and content, and most surprisingly, not hungry. I will endeavour to no longer worry about you when you do stuff like that.

PS. Do drop by every now and then, we're fond of you.