I want to replace my 25 year old bike but my bf says I should diet and lose 20 lbs?

[socaljewel]

Help! I know nothing about bike maintenance. my boyfriend does all my bike maintenance. But after 3 years of following my boyfriend around and listening to his scorn at my inability to maintain his speed or bike over 80 miles per day, I am thinking about spurging on another bike for the second time in 25 years. But Should I keep my Fiji made 25 years ago which is indestructable or should I buy a fancy new bike which will break down and cost me lot of money in repairs but will allow me to go on a bike tour or at the least let me keep pace with my boyfriend. I am a runner who runs 6 miles a day, 7 days a week and only bikes about 4 days a month

[bmccasland]

Get Thee to your nearest LBS! Shiny new bike, shiny new bike! :D LBS folks will be more than happy to help you out. Leave BF somewhere else.

Really, a newer model will be lighter, less weight to push around. And if you're having fun, enjoying the ride, you'll be more likely to ride - thus more likely to drop pounds.

And if you can already run 6 miles a day, it sounds like your weight is probably pretty healthy anyway, so tell BF to stick the 20 pounds up his nose. Are YOU happy with your weight??

[tangentgirl]

should I buy a fancy new bike which will break down and cost me lot of money in repairs

On the contrary, if you get a new bike, like a new car, you should not expect it to break or need repairs for quite a while. And it will likely have a warranty for the first year or so.

If you get the right bike, you'll be way more comfortable, the bike will be lighter, and it will be much easier for you to start riding faster. You might even want to ride more than 4 days a month.

Just remember, fit, fit, fit. Get a bike that fits right. Check out some of the threads here on choosing a new bike, there's lots of good advice.

We have a 25-year-old Fuji in the garage. It's really cool, but very heavy! My bf converted it into a single speed for fun.

[channlluv]

I'll be more blunt than Beth.

Drop the boyfriend. Buy the bike.

Good luck!

Roxy

[socaljewel]

Well I'm 5 3" and since my student days when I bought my Fiji Absolute, I have gained about 20 lbs. But with breast cancer, menopause, raising two kids, bouts of unemployment, I have not been overly concerned with my spare tire around my abdomen. I am used to the solid ride of my 35 lb Fiji bike with friction shifters and big tires. I am scared I will have lots of flats with skinny tires, and I'm scared the integrated brake index shifters will break constantly. I'm afraid I should save the $500 (Costco's Northrock or Wallmart's Trace bikes)

[Bike Writer]

If it were me, I'd lose the boyfriend then find someone who wants to share your passions along with his or at least is tolerant and accepting of other interests by their partner. But that's just me.

When someone genuinely likes another person, they give encouragment, not scorn.

[jessmarimba]

Fiji sounds like a keeper for a rainy-day no-hurry bike.

I'd hit the new boyfriend shop first and then go celebrate by buying a new bike :p

But yes, new bikes are superfun, you won't be able to keep your hands off of it! You'd for sure ride more than 4 days a month on a new light pretty shiny bike.

But...I'd also suggest not riding with the boyfriend if he's going to be like that. At least until you're more confident about yourself on a bike (and I don't mean a better rider - I just mean more sure of what you can do, and willing to stand up for it as an accomplishment. Plenty of people can't keep up with him, I'd bet, so don't feel upset that you can't.) I can't keep up (running OR biking) with my guy and he's always been very supportive of me anyway. I've been re-celebrating little milestones on the bike for the last six months and sometimes I think he's more proud of me than I am.

[Selkie]

If it were me, I'd lose the boyfriend then find someone who wants to share your passions along with his or at least is tolerant and accepting of other interests by their partner. But that's just me.

When someone genuinely likes another person, they give encouragment, not scorn.

The is wise advise. Sounds like you been through a lot, and without doubt, you deserve better.

Keep your Fuji until you want to buy or feel more comfortable buying a new bike.

[tangentgirl]

I am scared I will have lots of flats with skinny tires

Nah. I'm not saying it will never happen, but it's not like you'll be changing a tire every ride, or every other ride, or every other other ride. You can get this Goop stuff that goes in your tires that helps prevent it. You can even get kevlar tires, those things rock.


, and I'm scared the integrated brake index shifters will break constantly. I'm afraid I should save the $500 (Costco's Northrock or Wallmart's Trace bikes)

I hate to say this, but if you get a Costco or Walmart bike, then things breaking will be a problem. You definitely want to get something at a Local Bike Shop, or at the very least check out REI's bikes. You could also do a lot of research and find a used bike for around that much.

[bmccasland]

Well I'm 5 3" and since my student days when I bought my Fiji Absolute, I have gained about 20 lbs. But with breast cancer, menopause, raising two kids, bouts of unemployment, I have not been overly concerned with my spare tire around my abdomen. I am used to the solid ride of my 35 lb Fiji bike with friction shifters and big tires. I am scared I will have lots of flats with skinny tires, and I'm scared the integrated brake index shifters will break constantly. I'm afraid I should save the $500 (Costco's Northrock or Wallmart's Trace bikes)

Don't buy a cheap bike, you'll regret it. Go to a LBS - they'll help you pick a bike that fits, and works for the kind of riding you do, or want to do. They'll also teach you to take care of it. After all you've been through, our bodies aren't the same as when we were 20, sad, I know. I'm impressed that you run 6 miles/day! ;)

Flats - learn to fix them, or at least change tires. (LBS guys and gals can help here). Tires also come in varieties, again your LBS shop will help you pick out what you need. And there are liners too.

LBS! LBS!:D;):cool:

[owlice]

Help! I know nothing about bike maintenance.

You can learn if you'd like, or not and use a reliable LBS, as many others (men and women) do.


But after 3 years of following my boyfriend around and listening to his scorn at my inability to maintain his speed or bike over 80 miles per day
And you're following him around... why? Ride alone, find a new riding buddy, join a biking club. I couldn't keep up with him, and I wouldn't feel bad about that, and I sure as heck wouldn't let someone (him) try to make me feel bad about that! I ride because it's fun, and listening to scorn does not fall into the category of "fun."


Should I keep my Fiji made 25 years ago which is indestructable or should I buy a fancy new bike
This is a false dichotomy. :) Keep the Fiji, AND buy a new bike. No "or" necessary.


at the least let me keep pace with my boyfriend.
As I implied above, why would you want to "keep pace" with him? Seriously!

[mariacycle]

Drop the boyfriend. Buy the bike.

QFT! New bike = less maintenance and AWESOME SPEED. I was absolutely amazed how much faster my road bike was than my hybrid even though I was in worse shape when I bought it.

[mariacycle]

I am scared I will have lots of flats with skinny tires

Don't be scared. I was terrified for years and I finally just bought levers and a new tire and spent half an hour watching videos on YouTube while changing a tire in my living room. Then the next day I change my other tire and it took less than five minutes! It is really so much easier than you'd think! Practice in your home once or twice and you'll be confident, trust me!

[lph]

What they all said. Get a decent bike, learn how to fix a flat, tell your boyfriend to shut it - and lose 20 lbs if you want to. I won't lie and tell you it won't improve your cycling, if you have the lbs to lose. But buying a lighter bike will give you a proper kickstart, and probably the will to ride faster. Older bikes are not inherently more solid than new bikes. All bikes have parts that wear out and need replacing from time to time, that's just the way it is.

[Owlie]

What they all said. Tell the boyfriend to knock it off, go get yourself a shiny new LBS bike (and keep the Fuji for backup or whatever), and ride! There are plenty of ways to learn how to do your own maintenance, at the very least basics, like fixing a flat: Classes (check your LBS, or REI), books, online videos...

No, the new bike won't make you faster, but it will make riding more fun. And no, it won't break constantly if you buy quality. Heck, my bike is on the cheap end of road bikes, and things don't break--they need tweaking occasionally, but nothing's broken in three years (knock on wood!). Flats will happen, but it's not because of the tire width.

[smilingcat]

I've known guys who were annoyed if you could not keep up. It's unfortunate. But then again we all have our faults. I have mine...

If your BF is not happy having to slow down and "drag" you around when the two of you are cycling, he needs some attitude adjustment or have him go for a high intensity ride first, come back and pick you up and go for his cool down ride with you.

Just because you can run 5/6 times a week does not mean that you would have the same kind of conditioning on a bike. Mechanics of running and riding a bike is different. When I used to really ride and do incredible rides, my running was just the awful. I couldn't run a 10 minute mile.

If your BF wants you to buy a new bike, tell him to put his money where his mouth is and have him pitch in to buy you a new bike. It sounds like he wants to spend your money so have him spend his own and buy you a new bike.

As for big box store bike. NOT WORTH IT!! It will be crummier than the one you have.

REI does carry good bicycles for very reasonable price. And when you have found the one you like. Come back and ask us if you think its a good deal or not. Then you can decide whether to buy it or not. REI is big enough that they will have more of the same bike somewhere. Buy last years close out model to get a better price deal.

Enjoy spending your BF's money :D :p

[hebe]

Well I'm 5 3" and since my student days when I bought my Fiji Absolute, I have gained about 20 lbs. But with breast cancer, menopause, raising two kids, bouts of unemployment, I have not been overly concerned with my spare tire around my abdomen.


Wow. I would love to see the man who could make it through all of that without gaining a few pounds. Seriously.

Yes, get the bike. Watch some maintenance videos, do a class. I suspect that your man is worried that with the right sort of encouragement and equipment you would leave him in your dust. Good luck. Sometimes you have to listen to yourself (and everybody on here of course).

[socaljewel]

The bf is quite manipulative and doesn't have to literally come out and say, "you're a pig". All he has to do is sigh, or look back to see where I am, or say thiings like, "if I go any slower, I'll fall off" or refuse to pay for a trip to Colorado or anywhere other than biking around our neighborhood - for me to realize that he's tired of having a biking partner who is not able to go 60 miles without stopping for lunch. The bf himself has the same strict standards for himself - he has a 25 yr old Schwinn, his polyester clothes are from junior high and he's never paid for a hotel room he couldn't expense.

I'm also scared of going fast. I have only fallen a handful of times (on a pothole, trying to bike on sand, and learning to use clipless pedals) I don't know how to make tight turns. Who wants to go 25 mph and crash and break their collar bone?

[mariacycle]

socal, are you happy with him? it made me really sad to hear you say he was manipulative, do you feel like you can't leave him?

[channlluv]

Nobody deserves to be treated badly. Well, maybe murderers, rapists, genocidal dictators, and child molesters. But in general, and by "in general" I mean you, you don't deserve to be treated badly.

Buy yourself a beautiful new bike that fits you and tell the boyfriend to go riding by himself. I'm betting there's a women-friendly bike club near you. If you're running and you want to get into cycling, too, there's probably a triathlon club near you, too. People with whom you can relate.

Does the boyfriend run with you?

Roxy

[Desert Tortoise]

As others mentioned, joining a women's group is helpful. They tend to be much more helpful, supportive, noncompetitive and nonjudgemental. Groups like this tend to build up people. Hang around them long enough and you will see and feel a difference. Might even give you a new perspective.:)

dt

[channlluv]

PS - Here is a list of South Carolina cycling clubs. See if there's one near you.

http://www.sciway.net/tourism/cycling.html


Good luck.

Roxy

[7rider]

#1. If you're doing 60-80 mile rides on a 25 year old Fuji, PLUS running 6 miles a day, you are a freakin' ROCK STAR. If BF doesn't see that, find yourself someone who does.

#2. The best way to avoid flat tires is to keep your tires properly inflated. Check and add air before every ride. Get a good floor pump with a gauge. Talk to someone in a bike shop about how to use it properly, and keep those tires full of air. Don't ride on wet pavement if you can help it, and if you can't, clean off the tires when you are done. Stones, glass, and other road debris can work their way through a wet tire like a warm knife through butter. And, as others have mentioned, learn how to fix a flat because, well, even with due care, flats happen.

[Roadtrip]

I grew up with manipulative men (step-father) and I have to say... Don't take it anymore. Just don't. I realize it's an easy thing for us to say. You soooooo deserve more then the treatment you are receiving. It took years for mom to realize this and she stayed with a man who was both physically and verbally abusive because he convinced she could not do better and destroyed her already shaken self confidence. She would make excuses for his behavior again and again... When we finally did leave it was a middle of the night pack up and dash so he didn't know where we went, plus for many years we had this forboding fear he would re-enter ours lives to ruin the good we had begun to rebuild.

I'm not saying your situation is like mine, but please do not take this treatment, on or off the bike.

In terms of biking... Girl, you totally freaking rock to be able to ride a 30+ lb bike 60 miles before needing to stop for lunch. I wish I were able to ride like that and I do have a newer/lighter bike! Sounds like you really need some perspective and nobody can tell you exactly what to do, only you can make that choice for yourself, but I hope the ladies here have given you some of that needed perspective.

Wishing you the best,
Shannon

[westtexas]

+1 to what everyone else said.

I just bought a new bike and mine wasn't even that old. Love the new bike. It's really boosted my confidence which has made my riding better. And the guy I am dating right now is the best cycling partner I have had - he's there as a windblock and the head of our two-man pace line and when the tire went flat he fixed it (then taught me how to do it the next day when it wasn't 9:30 p.m. and dark outside) and he's actually the one who built my new bike from scratch.

Find people who support you as you are and enjoy biking for biking's sake. My guy right now is off riding with the race team he wants to join - while I relax on the couch after our 18 mile ride this morning.

And you know, you can always get good bikes used that are in good condition and the price is reduced. Check the for sale ads here or your local craigslist. Your LBS may even help people sell their old bikes (that's what I will be doing as soon as my carbon bars come in for my new one). Get to know the folks at the shop and they will often make a good deal with you - my shop sure did on my new Synapse that I had built from the frame up.

Good luck, let us know how it goes. We are here to help and support!!

[lph]

The bf himself has the same strict standards for himself - he has a 25 yr old Schwinn, his polyester clothes are from junior high and he's never paid for a hotel room he couldn't expense.


Ah. Well. I've grown up with people like that, and a good friends dh is like that. The whole "let's see if we can get away with spending as little as possible"-idea is fun if you're in on it and enjoy it too, but remember he has a whole lot of testosterone-built muscles driving that 25 yr old Schwinn. You are not just going to magically someday keep up with him because you're both riding heavy bikes. He literally has it easier, so the sighing and moaning is just bullsh1t.

You don't need the lightest carbon miracle out there to enjoy bike riding more, but you DO need a bike that's more suited to YOU. I don't know enough about prices in the us to give you a ballpark figure, but there is a pretty clear level below which you shouldn't go. It's not just hype and frivolous spending. I have only old (not that old!) bikes and fix them myself, but even that does cost money.

Please - find a bike club nearby, and find some women who ride. You will not regret it.

[divingbiker]

This makes me so sad. And so glad I'm single.

[wannaduacentury]

Help! I know nothing about bike maintenance. my boyfriend does all my bike maintenance. But after 3 years of following my boyfriend around and listening to his scorn at my inability to maintain his speed or bike over 80 miles per day, I am thinking about spurging on another bike for the second time in 25 years. But Should I keep my Fiji made 25 years ago which is indestructable or should I buy a fancy new bike which will break down and cost me lot of money in repairs but will allow me to go on a bike tour or at the least let me keep pace with my boyfriend. I am a runner who runs 6 miles a day, 7 days a week and only bikes about 4 days a month

Keep your old one and ride it for fun/nostalgia. Get a new one that will inspire you to ride often. Jenn

[WindingRoad]

Oh my goodness, your boyfriend needs a new attitude. There's no excuse for belittling you for not keeping up with him. We are all different people and by no means can he expect the same from you just because he can do it, that's absolutely ridiculous!!! I won't keep going on about that subject but you don't deserve to be treated like this.

On the other hand, you can get a road bike for around $600 new. I know it's not a small business but if there is a 'Performance Bike' near you the bikes are very reasonably priced. Best of luck to you but for the record I think you are WAY stronger than you are giving yourself credit for. Six mile run a day! wow!!!

[socaljewel]

I live in Aiken SC. It's hot in the summer and it's grueling to go on long bike rides. I love running in Hitchcock trails but I do not run on the days I go biking with bf. His bike has about 200,000 miles on it but he'd rather give his money to charity than buy a new wallmart bike. He makes his own gatorade from salt and sugar and KoolAid. He won't go running or snowboarding because he won't do any sports that requires special equipment or requires you to pay for plane tickets. He goes hiking on old steel toe shoes he wears at the plant. Last summer we went mountain biking in Greenbriar trail and New River Trail in Virginia and West Virginia. since I don't have a mountain bike and didn't have $100 to buy one from wallmart, I rode his spare mountainbike. Since he's 6' and I'm 5 3" it was a very uncomfortable ride not to mention monotonous covering 50 miles a day of boring old railroad track. We have to carry all our own water and food because he won't be ripped off buying drinks at gas stations or expensive little gift shops. he does maximum weights in the gym and I've never seen him out of breath, or sweat or pant. It's no wonder his wife is so mad at him after 29 years of marriage she doesn't even talk to him.

[Kerry1976]

I live in Aiken SC. It's hot in the summer and it's grueling to go on long bike rides. I love running in Hitchcock trails but I do not run on the days I go biking with bf. His bike has about 200,000 miles on it but he'd rather give his money to charity than buy a new wallmart bike. He makes his own gatorade from salt and sugar and KoolAid. He won't go running or snowboarding because he won't do any sports that requires special equipment or requires you to pay for plane tickets. He goes hiking on old steel toe shoes he wears at the plant. Last summer we went mountain biking in Greenbriar trail and New River Trail in Virginia and West Virginia. since I don't have a mountain bike and didn't have $100 to buy one from wallmart, I rode his spare mountainbike. Since he's 6' and I'm 5 3" it was a very uncomfortable ride not to mention monotonous covering 50 miles a day of boring old railroad track. We have to carry all our own water and food because he won't be ripped off buying drinks at gas stations or expensive little gift shops. he does maximum weights in the gym and I've never seen him out of breath, or sweat or pant. It's no wonder his wife is so mad at him after 29 years of marriage she doesn't even talk to him.

Wait, what? Is he still married?

No real caring boyfriend (or friend, for that matter) would allow a someone 5'3" to ride a bike built for a 6' tall person. That's wrong. You could have gotten seriously injured. Frugal is one thing - cheap to the point of recklessness is another.

And, as a runner myself, total props on 6 miles per day. That's no joke. As was said earlier, you are a rockstar.

I normally wouldn't say this - but I agree with everyone else. Dump the loser boyfriend, get a nice shiny new bike that you love, and celebrate the amazing person you are.

And, welcome to the TE forums. I really hope you stay on here so we can continue to support and cheer you on.

[Savra]

I'll be more blunt than Beth.

Drop the boyfriend. Buy the bike.

Good luck!

Roxy


I haven't read much of what other people have said here but I completely agree on this one. Tell boyfriend to go screw himself as well as to stop disparaging you for being slow and saying you need to lose 20 pounds. Then go buy yourself the bike of your dreams. Even better if he pays for it and then you dump him.
Just saying.

[zoom-zoom]

I am scared I will have lots of flats with skinny tires, and I'm scared the integrated brake index shifters will break constantly.

Nope...I just had my first flat ever a week ago--after logging > 5k miles. My bikes have had 23 and 25mm wide tires. I don't have too much trouble keeping up with my hubby, either, though he doesn't try to drop me. He rides easy and I push myself...though the more I ride, the less I have to push and the less he has to pull back. Because he supports me, I am eager to improve and ride more. My first year on a road bike I logged 3500 miles (in addition to running 1k miles). If he were unsupportive (as it sounds your BF is), I doubt I would have pedaled even half that. He's my biggest cheerleader (it behooves him to be, since now I can't pick on him for all the bikes in the garage--because now a couple are mine. ;)).

[Biciclista]

and you don't have to buy the super skinny tires kind of bike to improve what you have.
Good luck. he doesn't own you. Take care of YOU...

[tulip]

troll

[Biciclista]

you could be right

[Trek420]

Tulip is very wise. It's possible :)

[zoom-zoom]

Tulip is very wise. It's possible :)

I have yellow flags...perhaps not red, but the thought did cross my mind, as well. If the OP is not a troll, then I feel very very sad for her. But I've known women with similar stories, which is the thing that keeps me from jumping immediately to the full-on troll suspicion.

[Kerry1976]

I have yellow flags...perhaps not red, but the thought did cross my mind, as well. If the OP is not a troll, then I feel very very sad for her. But I've known women with similar stories, which is the thing that keeps me from jumping immediately to the full-on troll suspicion.

+1. I thought the same thing.

[Trek420]

Well, can we leave it this way. I don't want to put off the OP (do any of us remember our first post to TE?) and am prepared to welcome her to TE. We're a nice group, really. Cautious perhaps, been trolled before, and doubtless will be again but a really nice group.

[KnottedYet]

Well, can we leave it this way. I don't want to put off the OP (do any of us remember our first post to TE?) and am prepared to welcome her to TE. We're a nice group, really. Cautious perhaps, been trolled before, and doubtless will be again but a really nice group.

An abusive married boyfriend and a bike for a person half a foot taller.

I don't even know where to start...

[marni]

just a comment- unless your boyfriend is 20 pounds skinnier than every other single person he rides with or against, he has no right to tell you how to handle your weight or judge your appearance.

As for flat tires- I have had my semi expensive middle price range road bike for 5 years, and have had a total of 3 flats, the entire time, and I just ride on the type of tire that the bike came with. I have one change out of brakes and gear system due to
worn out issues, and replaced the chain three times. In that time I have put in endless hours and averaged over 5,000 miles a year, but then I am retired and no longer work so I have time. Granted that's not as much as some people ride, but it is more than a lot a people do.

I would also question your boyfriends math of 200,000 miles ridden unless it is his life record. If we're talking say a 10 year period, that's 20,000 miles a year which is 400 miles a week. Is he riding non stop 24/7 or what?

A good bike is a good bike, and a bad boy friend is a bad boy friend.

just sayin

marni

[Trek420]

The bicycle is just as good company as most husbands and, when it gets old and shabby, a woman can dispose of it and get a new one without shocking the entire community. ~Ann Strong

[zoom-zoom]

The bicycle is just as good company as most husbands and, when it gets old and shabby, a woman can dispose of it and get a new one without shocking the entire community. ~Ann Strong

I'm pretty lucky. I got a great bike and a great hubby...he's probably more than great. He totally enables my "addiction." :cool:

[Trek420]

Obviously Ann Strong did not have as great a DH ;)

[zoom-zoom]

Obviously Ann Strong did not have as great a DH ;)

I have friends like Ann...mostly I want to kick their hubbies in the nuts for being such losers. :p

[smilingcat]

her last entry is very interesting...

As they say in mystery novel, things are not as what they seemed to be.

[Velocivixen]

I thought this was a troll. Maybe or maybe not. If not, then very sad. If so then got a lot of folks fired up. Seems to be saying just enough to get a reaction.

[rubysoho]

Drop the boyfriend. Buy the bike.



Agreed. :cool:

[Bike Writer]

troll

What Tulip said, the thing that did it for me was the married part. Why would anyone be with an abusive cheapskate, especially if he's married. :confused:

[Biciclista]

well, actually, if someone is a cheapskate it's likely that he will be a cheapskate everywhere with everyone. wife, kids, gf, etc...

[Cataboo]

Well I'm 5 3" and since my student days when I bought my Fiji Absolute, I have gained about 20 lbs. But with breast cancer, menopause, raising two kids, bouts of unemployment, I have not been overly concerned with my spare tire around my abdomen. I am used to the solid ride of my 35 lb Fiji bike with friction shifters and big tires. I am scared I will have lots of flats with skinny tires, and I'm scared the integrated brake index shifters will break constantly. I'm afraid I should save the $500 (Costco's Northrock or Wallmart's Trace bikes)

Costco's NOrthrock is not bad from what I've seen of it in Costco. I wouldn't recommend it as a bike for someone with a lot of money to spend - but if you're in debt from the kids, unemployment, etc. - the costco bike is great for the $500 IF it fits you. Make sure to keep extra money for taking it to the bike shop to get looked over. Costco also has a great return policy on that, so if it turns out to be a mistake, you can return it at any point.

But if you can afford more like $1,000, maybe see how far your money can go at REI, which also has a great return policy.

If it seemed like you had a greater sense for what you needed, I'd say go look at used.

[socaljewel]

There's lots of advantages for me in biking with biking wunderkind. I never have to look at a map. I never have to load the bikes onto the bike racks. I never have to spend any money on bike maintenance. on my own I wouldn't bike let alone bike 5 hrs and cover 73 miles. But there are limits to how much even he will do. For some reason, he lives like a penniless graduate student. But he's happy so who am I to argue. My kids spend money like water and they're miserable. I am so impressed with women who know how to maintain their bikes. I must be learning something from being around the bf and watching him. Maybe one day I will be able to change a tire or replace cables or change a broken spoke.

[Biciclista]

what is biking wunderkind? :confused:

[Crankin]

wonderkind= genius

Something sounds terribly wrong here....

[indysteel]

Troll or trainwreck, take your pick. Either way, I don't want to touch this with a 10-foot pole.

[goldfinch]

People can have married boyfriends.
People can have controlling boyfriends.
People can have stingy boyfriends.
People often exaggerate when telling stories.

But can a person who is old enough to have adult children ride a too big mountain bike 50 miles when riding only four days a month? Can they ride their 35 pound "big tire" bike 73 miles in five hours? If nothing else, the OP has a tough rear end.

Socaljewel (if you are for real), you said that you would not bike on your own. You mentioned the boring mountainbike trail. Maybe biking isn't for you. Maybe you are a runner.

[socaljewel]

my hats off to all of you women. I wish I knew all the things you know. I wish I had the energy to go biking on my own. Running requires no equipment and no hauling the equipment around and there's no risk of bodily injury from crashes at high speeds. I hope one day to be as self sufficient and as knowledgable as you guys are.

[redrhodie]

I hope you can find the strength to ride your ride. It's pretty liberating to be able to hop on the bike whenever you want, and ride as fast as you want, with no one to tell you you're doing it wrong.

I think you have the strength and the knowledge already. I think the thing you are lacking is something else, maybe self esteem. The ability to learn to change a flat, to ride alone, to buy the bike you want without needing someone else's approval, just needs to be harnessed. You need to realize your own worth, and put that first.

[Trek420]

The stuff I know I learned right here on TE, and my LBS, and local bike clubs ... I did not come to the forum knowing it although I've always ridden a bike and used to run. It's a long process of read, ride, write a report, get feedback, read, learn, ride again alone or with a group ... repeat ...

Long live TE :D

[Antaresia]

Wait, is it even possible to have been married for 29 years and still wear clothes from junior high? Those things must be so thread bare, I would assume multiple arrests for indecent exposure would be worth shelling out a few bucks for a new shirt.

So much of this post screams troll! But the DIY gatorade sounds cool.

OP, I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt because being in an abusive relationship SUCKS when people don't believe you, or think you must be exaggerating, or don't understand why you don't just leave....
but seriously. If all this is for reals you need to find support and dump this jerk. Worry about the perfect bike once you get your life back in order.

[zoom-zoom]

So much of this post screams troll! But the DIY gatorade sounds cool.

I have a recipe...I will post it. :D

[Cataboo]

I've heard from her in email. She's taking a team estrogen break.

[Biciclista]

she's alive and well on Facebook.

[wannaduacentury]

I hope you can find the strength to ride your ride. It's pretty liberating to be able to hop on the bike whenever you want, and ride as fast as you want, with no one to tell you you're doing it wrong.

I think you have the strength and the knowledge already. I think the thing you are lacking is something else, maybe self esteem. The ability to learn to change a flat, to ride alone, to buy the bike you want without needing someone else's approval, just needs to be harnessed. You need to realize your own worth, and put that first.

+1 I'll say this very kindly, you need a break from your bf, doing so would give you a breath of fresh air to think on your own two feet. As some of the others have said, join a local group in your area and dive into biking. A new bike is lightweight to load and unload. You're stronger than you think. But you need a clear head and get out from under his thumb which is seriously dragging you down in many areas. I wish you the best. Get out there and get riding. jw

[PscyclePath]

All the ladies up above have given good advice...

If I were in your shoes, I'd say something like "Screw the 20 pounds... let's lose about 180" and dump the manipulative boy/girlfriend. Nobody that you care about (or who cares about you) deserves to be treated teh way you describe.

Buy the new bike. It'll be better company, take you new places, and maybe change your life for the better. It's a big ocean, and there are a lot of better fish out there in the pond.

[PamNY]

Have you looked at used bikes? I just got a really good deal on Craigslist. It took a long time, but I found exactly what I wanted -- like new and about half retail.

It has slightly smaller tires and different shifters, but I hopped on it and rode home (in Manhattan) with no problem -- though I did wait till after rush hour.

Why don't you just start looking for bikes and see where it leads you? You can get good advice about bikes here -- I got a whole tutorial (http://forums.teamestrogen.com/showthread.php?t=41950&highlight=evaluate+bike) on how to evaluate a used bike.

If you don't want people commenting on your personal life, just don't mention it.

[gnat23]

Running requires no equipment and no hauling the equipment around and there's no risk of bodily injury from crashes at high speeds.

A bit off-topic, but the only concussion I've given myself was from tripping and falling while trail running. So there's that.

-- gnat! ("Weren't you wearing a helmet?" "I was running.")

[zoom-zoom]

A bit off-topic, but the only concussion I've given myself was from tripping and falling while trail running. So there's that.

-- gnat! ("Weren't you wearing a helmet?" "I was running.")

Ha, the worst injury I ever incurred was while trail running, too...a grade 2 sprain that I continued to run on for 9.9 miles, since I was part of a relay team.

Guess what got me into cycling like I did a year ago...? ;) Not being able to run at all for 5.5 weeks and only limited for closer to 12 made my bike my best friend. :)

[Biciclista]

Salsabike fell while running last year and her hand still isn't right. best to stay home in bed!

[zoom-zoom]

Salsabike fell while running last year and her hand still isn't right. best to stay home in bed!

Yep, my ankle still is not right a year later. Though that's more from doing everything wrong in the first 48 hours after injury than it was from the injury itself, I'm certain. Continuing to run, standing around, minimal icing, minimal elevation, drinking of beer...yeah, pretty much textbook what NOT to do on a fresh sprain! :o

[Owlie]

Even the beer?

[zoom-zoom]

Even the beer?

Heh, yep...anything that thins the blood is kind of a no-no, since it increases bleeding and swelling at the injury site, which increases damage.

[Owlie]

Heh, yep...anything that thins the blood is kind of a no-no, since it increases bleeding and swelling at the injury site, which increases damage.

I'd think it'd have a net dehydrating effect...unless it somehow acts as a vasodilator and makes already leaky blood vessels even leakier. I can't find anything about vasopressin acting as a vasoconstrictor except in large doses, though.
/nerd

Probably not a good idea to imbibe anyway due to interactions with painkillers and all that, though.

[zoom-zoom]

Probably not a good idea to imbibe anyway due to interactions with painkillers and all that, though.

That too!

[wackyjacky1]

Well, now I know why all my injuries are slow to heal. http://foolstown.com/sm/alc.gif

[zoom-zoom]

Well, now I know why all my injuries are slow to heal. http://foolstown.com/sm/alc.gif

:D I'm from WI...beer is medicine! ;)

[andtckrtoo]

A bit off-topic, but the only concussion I've given myself was from tripping and falling while trail running. So there's that.

-- gnat! ("Weren't you wearing a helmet?" "I was running.")

My favorite quote about trail running (which I, too, do) is: "There are two kinds of trail runners. Those who have fallen, and those who will." I'm in the former group. :p

As for the OP, I'm not her and I don't know her situation so I have no opinion on BF.

[beccaB]

Beer.. is that why I fall down all the time!