well that was awkward

[aponi]

About a week ago I got my very first road bike. I want to start doing triathlons and the old mountain bike from college wasn't going to cut it. I had to ride it home from the shop because my bike rack fits into a trailer hitch and until yesterday my car didn't have a trailer hitch. That ride was a bit harrowing, but also kind of fun.

I'm having a problem though, a bit of genital discomfort we'll call it. At first I thought it was a matter of getting used to the new bike but I've done a bit of research and don't think that's the case. I get that the sit bones need to cowboy up a bit but there are areas of my body I'd rather not have toughened up any thank you very much. I read somewhere that some women have success lowering the front of the seat a bit. I tried to do that myself and by that I mean started fiddling with it until my hovering husband couldn't stand it anymore and took over. Neither of us could pull it off. The bike shop fitted me to the bike and said that they would do any adjusting necessary so ok fine, I'll call them and see if they can do it.

That conversation did not go so well.

Naturally they only have men working in the repair area. I figure no big deal, surely he's dealt with this sort of thing before. I explained that I needed my seat pointed down a tad. He said he wasn't a fan of that and since the bike was so new it just might be a matter of me getting used to it. Uh no, this isn't a getting used to it deal, this is a WOW that can't be right sort of deal.

Then he asked me specifically where it was hitting me wrong. I was trying to be subtle. I thought he'd get it when I said that I needed my weight further back on my sits bones but apparently not.

I'm going over there this weekend. I'm making my husband go along in case there needs to be a man to man talk about the female anatomy.

[indysteel]

Just tell them that it's your soft tissue. They should understand that. But, then again, I just call things what they are. Don't get me wrong; I understand your embarrassment, but I'm about 25 years past needing to sugar coat the names of my body parts. It's all in the delivery. If I'm matter of fact about it, more often than not, the other person is,too.

Tilting the saddle down does not work for me, personally. What does work for me is a saddle with a cut out.

[aponi]

Yea I may end up with a new saddle, but I thought I'd at least try getting the seat adjusted a bit first.

They were all over fitting the bike perfectly, measuring the angle of my knee and all that you'd think a bit more attention would be paid to the seat. I guess if you're already buying a bike, repair kit, helmet, water bottle cage, shorts....they didn't hit me with a new saddle on top of it all.

[thekarens]

A lot of the time saddles are trial and error. You might also try chamois cream. That's what works for me for that area.

[indysteel]

Yea I may end up with a new saddle, but I thought I'd at least try getting the seat adjusted a bit first.

They were all over fitting the bike perfectly, measuring the angle of my knee and all that you'd think a bit more attention would be paid to the seat. I guess if you're already buying a bike, repair kit, helmet, water bottle cage, shorts....they didn't hit me with a new saddle on top of it all.

I've bought a number of bikes from a number of shops, and none have attempted to sell me a new saddle from the get-go. It's such an individualized thing. Most women seem to come to TE after buying a bike and realizing, within a few rides, that they may need a new saddle. So, I wouldn't read much into how your bike shop did (or did not) approach saddle issues with you. Beyond getting the saddle in the right place in terms of height and fore/aft and making sure it's level (a good place to start), most will leave it to you to initiate any further dicussion as to what might be a better choice for you.

What kind of shorts did you get? If you want true saddle nirvana, it's going to take the right saddle paired with the right shorts.

[velo]

You can't be shy about what is bothering you. Spell it out for them... my labia get sore from the friction, my butt is sore from the pressure, etc. They are all adults and they should be able to deal with the female anatomy. I'm sure men have no problem telling about what hurts and what doesn't.

But it really is true that you get used to it. I had a big ride last month, rode hard the following week, then gave my body a break. I rode over 200 miles that next week and all of my nether regions were more uncomfortable than usual even though I had ridden 300 miles two weeks prior. I'm back in the groove and no longer have any discomfort. It's not my saddle, it's my body. Also, you have to have the right shorts to pair with the saddle. It may not even be your saddle, but the shorts that are causing the discomfort.

Still, it may be your saddle. Like Indy, I have a cutout on my saddles that is necessary for my comfort. I know there are others here that require longer noses, shorter noses, no cut out, cut outs... etc. Fit of the bike frame or angle of seat may not be your issue. It may be the saddle itself. Take a look at Sheila's threads on saddles. There is a treasure trove of information there. Good luck!!

[ZenBiker]

The one time I had a discussion like this at my LBS, it was a general conversation i.e. I wasn't having a problem, we were just chatting about bike gear. He mentioned something that worked well for 'guy stuff' and I responded in kind about how 'girl stuff' would be different, and we both laughed a little, but we understood each other and it wasn't uncomfortable at all!

[Grits]

Like an earlier poster said, just tell them it is a soft tissue problem. That should do it.

[zoom-zoom]

Honestly, I think a lot of guys simply don't "get" the difference between their junk and ours. While men tend to battle nerve issues, we have the added "bonus" of mucous membranes to contend with. And the direct effect of hormones on that. I definitely know that certain times of the month (ie right before my period starts and for the first few days, at least) that I'm more likely to have issues with my saddle. I've had zero luck with all 3 menstrual cups I have tried, so then I have the extra issue of a raspy tampon string all up in my stuff. Guys just don't get it and a lot are downright skeeved-out by it. Not my DH, but I think he's less weirded-out by these things because I'm completely open about my issues (plus have a long history of reproductive miseries, so my privates have always sorta been on his radar, heh).

[PamNY]

I agree that "soft tissue" should work. In fact, the LBS where I bought a saddle used the term before I did.

A slight downward tilt makes a huge difference for me. I spent several days adjusting saddle tilt and placement, and it was worth the annoyance. I have a hybrid -- not a road bike -- I don't know if that matters.

Good luck with your quest.

[MichelleOH]

Congratulations on your new bike, aponi! I wish someone would draw a diagram of both men and women sitting on a saddle -- maybe from the side, as a cross cut or something -- so we could just point. It hurt's THERE. I also think it would help everyone understand how we fit on a saddle. I don't believe it's how most of us think.

In going through my saddle search for the past couple of weeks, most non-bikers say something along the lines that I should get a wide, padded "granny seat". I usually say "great suggestion" and move the conversation to a different topic.

[aponi]

thanks for all the suggestions

Funny thing is I was talking to my sister and she said that was why she quit riding. She had no idea that anything could be done. The good news about this is that now she's motivated to pull the bike out of the garage, take it to the LBS, and start figuring out what she can do differently. She's been trying to lose weight, getting back on that bike might be a good first start for her.

[indysteel]

thanks for all the suggestions

Funny thing is I was talking to my sister and she said that was why she quit riding. She had no idea that anything could be done. The good news about this is that now she's motivated to pull the bike out of the garage, take it to the LBS, and start figuring out what she can do differently. She's been trying to lose weight, getting back on that bike might be a good first start for her.

That's great! I hope you both get it figured out. It may take some patience, but there are lots of options and combinations out there. It's just a matter of finding what works for you.

[thekarens]

This is a little off topic, but when I had my fitting done my fitter had a thing that went over the saddle, so when you sat on it and got into your normal riding position it showed all the pressure points on the screen so he would know how/where to adjust the saddle. I thought that was pretty slick.

[indysteel]

That is pretty slick! Did it assist you in picking the right saddle from the get-go?