Hmmm, I guess the first thing would be to figure out how much you really can spend for, say, the initial layout and then your monthly additions to the gear stash.
Then you can gather infomration - there are some excellent books on cycling and women's cycling, though some stuff you really do have to find out for yourself (for example, everythign I read said "don't get a kickstand" but my bike and riding style said otherwise... and I often WEAR COTTON ) just because I already have all those ride t-shirts!
Making plans can be more than half the fun, right?