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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Indianapolis, IN
    Posts
    1,033

    Extremely Annoying Person - How to get away?

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    So as my title says, I have a bit of a conundrum. I am in a professional health program. I met a certain female, lets call her Kim, in my class that seemed to be struggling academically and socially. Short version is I felt sorry for her, tried to help her out, which I think I did, but honestly she is soooooooo annoying. She is loud, crude, extremely negative, immature to the nth degree, superficial, vain, all about full runway makeup every single day, has no problems just standing around in peoples way flipping her hair and dresses like she going to a club even when we are told to dress conservatively. She doesn't have a car so I made the mistake of offering her a ride and since then she came it expect it. So I have purposefully ridden my bike or 'had things to do' before or after a time she was trying to meet up with me to avoid burning my gas. I mean she lives a block and a half from school, it isn't like its a 5 mile walk! When I offered to give her rides to clinic she would make me late. She has done this to so many people now that no one wants to give her a ride to clinic. Sigh..... this person has done so many irresponsible things over the time I have known her that I just don't want to be associated any longer. At this point, especially since my classmates see her as a total joke, it's becoming harder to take her seriously. Have you ever met someone that dresses like they are going on the runway and that is pretty much all they have? From what I can see, I don't think she has any hobbies other than fighting with her daily BF on her phone. I mean the drama is so above and beyond what is normal that this is why myself and my classmates can't take her seriously. She started telling me graphic details about the guys she's dating and it grosses me out. When all is said and done, she absolutely repulses me. Since I started talking to her, she has clinged on to me since I am essentially the only person that speaks to her at school so it's hard to just ignore her and then I feel guilty because I know she has no other friends at the school. I did get her to talk to the school counselor when we first met. I've considered talking to the school counselor about ways to deal with this since she knows Kim's situation too.

    This is a bit of a rant I realize, but I would love to hear any insight you might have on trying to eliminate this person from my routine. I still have another 7 months of being in the same place as her.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Beautiful NW or Left Coast
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    5,619
    Since i'm not there, it's hard for me to see, but can't you tell her you are busy, you don't have time, please leave me alone?
    DO NOT give her any more rides!! If you give her the cold shoulder, she might find some other easy mark. I do think you speaking to the counselor would help YOU!
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Pacific Northwest
    Posts
    534

    Extremely Annoying Person - How to get away?

    This is a person who is trying to be a health professional? Gawd, that is scary.

    I really try to avoid dealing with toxic people, and this woman sounds like the definition of toxic. You are justified in avoiding her.
    "Don't go too fast, but I go pretty far"

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    the dry side
    Posts
    4,367

    Extremely Annoying Person - How to get away?

    If she can't get herself to where she needs to be herself, the problem should solve itself.
    Don't offer any enabling. The rest off it(make up, outfits, drama) is none of your business and if you don't hang out with her, really not your business at all.
    Last edited by Irulan; 04-09-2013 at 06:07 PM.
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  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Concord, MA
    Posts
    13,394
    I'm reading a book called "Azzhole."
    Although the author states that the majority are men, she seems to fit the definition, which has to do with entitlement.
    This book is hysterical. It's written like a serious philosophy text and makes comparisons with several historical and economic movements/theories in relation to "the azzhole."
    A little off topic, but your post reminded me of some of the things in the book.
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  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Central Indiana
    Posts
    6,043
    I'm with Irulan on both her points. If your classmate continues to press you for a ride and you feel like a broken record in coming up with excuses, then I'd just tell her the truth. "You've made me run late so I'm not going to give you any other rides." Sounds harsh, I realize, but it may be something you need to say and she needs to hear.

    But I also agree with Irulan that her others issues aren't your problem. I wouldn't talk to her school counselor about them. In fact, I'd be shocked if a school counselor would even talk to one student about another student's "problems" unless they were a threat to themselves or others. I'd otherwise just try to distance yourself as best you can. How much longer in your program do you have?
    Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.

    --Mary Anne Radmacher

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    On my bike
    Posts
    2,505
    You don't owe her an explanation. "I can't give you a ride anymore" is a complete sentence. If she presses you, refuse to engage with her. Period.
    To train a dog, you must be more interesting than dirt.

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  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Central Indiana
    Posts
    6,043
    Quote Originally Posted by Dogmama View Post
    You don't owe her an explanation. "I can't give you a ride anymore" is a complete sentence. If she presses you, refuse to engage with her. Period.
    Good point. My suggestion offered a reason, but Dogmama is right. You do not have to give her a reason.
    Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.

    --Mary Anne Radmacher

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    On my bike
    Posts
    2,505
    Thanks Indy. I always figure that arguing with someone like that is like wrestling with a pig in the mud. You get dirty & the pig loves it.
    To train a dog, you must be more interesting than dirt.

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  10. #10
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    West MI
    Posts
    4,259
    I smell troll. Way to resurrect a zombie thread...
    Kirsten
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  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    Mrs. KnottedYet
    Posts
    9,067
    Quote Originally Posted by zoom-zoom View Post
    I smell troll. Way to resurrect a zombie thread...
    4 posts and referring to the @zzhole who op describes as always wearing full runway makeup as "him"? Not that there would be anything wrong with that. But yes, a troll.

    They do serve a purpose though; rediscovering some great old threads!
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  12. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Uncanny Valley
    Posts
    14,501
    Our troll gives good advice on dealing with trolls though. And might actually be a him.
    Speed comes from what you put behind you. - Judi Ketteler

 

 

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