Welcome guest, is this your first visit? Click the "Create Account" button now to join.

To disable ads, please log-in.

Shop at TeamEstrogen.com for women's cycling apparel.

Page 1 of 8 12345 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 118
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    287

    Haven't ridden for 3 days because of a very scary man

    To disable ads, please log-in.

    I think I'm going to go get back on my bike this morning, but I'm scared and that just takes all the joy out of it.

    I live in the boonies, quite some distance from any police help. There's this guy who lives a little over a mile down the road from me. He's out every day on his 4-wheeler with a chainsaw, up and down the road, cutting up dead fall and bringing it home to burn in his wood stove. A couple of people warned me in the past "stay away from that guy, he and his wife are crazy," and I've never talked to him or had a run-in with him until recently.

    Well - he's followed me twice now and he makes it very clear that he's following me. He's deliberately scaring me and enjoying it. He doesn't just hang back - he'll ride up beside me on his 4-wheeler and stare at me, then go ahead of me for a quarter mile or so and pull over and stare at me as I ride past him, then get back behind me and follow me some more. The last time I rode my bike, he was out in somebody's yard cutting wood and saw me going by. He turned off his chainsaw and got on his 4-wheeler and followed me again. This time he pulled up next to me when I was at a stop sign and said "sorry for scaring you, nice day for a bike ride isn't it?" I said "Yes, it's a beautiful day," and continued riding and he got behind me again and followed me for at least a mile (and yes - he was following me, not just riding down the road. You don't ride down the road, behind a bicycle, that slowly on a 4-wheeler) before I took out my cell phone and pretended to be calling for help, at which point he pulled into the driveway of a farm where nobody was home. Keep in mind there are very few cars down these country roads - I was quite a lone with him. I kept looking back to see if he backed out and went home, but he didn't. I think he was behind the trees watching me. He WANTED me to be afraid.

    I kept riding until I was far enough away that he couldn't see where I was going, then I hid between some buildings and called my son to give me a ride home.

    When I told my son what happened he said "That's funny, because something weird happened before. I didn't mention it because it seemed so crazy that I thought I was imagining it, but he was out on the road with a hand gun one day, waving it in the air." Then when I told my husband about what happened he said "That's funny, because one day I saw him prowling around on our property."

    I could call the police but, seriously, it wouldn't do any good. People have called the police on him many times before and they don't do anything. He's mentally ill - what are they going to do? They can't put him in jail and they can't have him hospitalized because there aren't any mental hospitals up here anymore. If I see him brandishing a firearm again, then I'll call for sure.

    The police think I'm a nut case, anyway, because I've called them so many times before. I called because there was a drunk driver weaving back and forth from ditch to ditch on our road, and because somebody was shooting guns right outside my window (turned out they were just hunting - but they were trespassing), and one time my son accidentally dialed 911 and, even though they called back and asked if everything was OK, they still showed up in force and shined spotlights all over my house (took them a long time to get here, though), and I called another time because a dangerous schizophrenic patient (I've taken care of him in the ER) was out on the side of the road hitchiking and I didn't want him to hurt anybody, and another time because there was a huge dead buck in the middle of the highway, and another time because a bunch of idiots put a deer bait pile right by the highway and we hit two deer in two days because of it and . . . . . . . . . you get the picture.

    Anyway . . . . I do have a concealed carry permit (wouldn't you get one if you lived here?), but I don't want to have to carry a gun on my bike! I want to have fun on my bike and, besides, it'll stretch out my jacket. I'd have to carry it in my pocket because I don't have a holster. I want to be free and not worry about stuff! It's not fun at all to ride when you're scared.

    There is one road where I've never seen him, and I don't have to ride past his house to get there. I think I'll go ahead and bring a gun - tears are stinging my eyes just thinking of having to carry a gun doing the one thing I really enjoy doing . . . . but he is truly dangerous.

    Sorry. I just had to vent. I'm so mad and sad and frustrated. I get depressed when I don't get exercise and I haven't had a good workout in days. I'm about ready to start bawling my eyes out.

    Sometimes it's so hard to live here.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    4,516
    That sucks. I'm so sorry you're dealing with that

    Can you drive elsewhere to ride for a little while? To let things settle down??

    CA
    Most days in life don't stand out, But life's about those days that will...

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Little Egypt
    Posts
    1,867
    How horrible! I thought dogs were an issue..............that's nothing compared to this.

    Could you drive to another spot and ride from there?
    __________________
    "We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing." George Bernard Shaw

    Luna Eclipse/Selle Italia Lady
    Surly Pacer/Terry Butterfly
    Quintana Roo Cd01/Koobi Stratus
    1981 Schwinn Le Tour Tourist
    Jamis Coda Femme

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    287
    Quote Originally Posted by CA_in_NC View Post
    That sucks. I'm so sorry you're dealing with that

    Can you drive elsewhere to ride for a little while? To let things settle down??

    CA
    I thought about it - but I have to put my bike in the back of my car and I have a problem taking my wheel off and putting it back on. The brakes always get out of alignment. I know it's because I'm kind of new to riding and I'm doing something wrong.

    Maybe I'll go ahead and try to do that today, though.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    287
    If I'm going to go I'd better get going now. I think I'll try to drive somewhere else and go for a ride.

    Just for future reference if - you know - I'm missing . . . . his last name is Spalding and he lives in the house with the pet pigeons, set back from the county road!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    3,853
    You could get a nice big can of bear spray (pepper spray) and keep in in your bottle cage, next time he follows you stop (keep your bike between you and him) and say loudly STOP FOLLOWING ME!! Peddle off and when he starts following you again...mace the hell out of him. If it were me and I had a CCW, I'd carry for a while as well.

    Electra Townie 7D

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    646
    Quote Originally Posted by Pax View Post
    You could get a nice big can of bear spray (pepper spray) and keep in in your bottle cage, next time he follows you stop (keep your bike between you and him) and say loudly STOP FOLLOWING ME!! Peddle off and when he starts following you again...mace the hell out of him. If it were me and I had a CCW, I'd carry for a while as well.
    Yes, but he may have a gun handy....and he is unstable....
    Ana
    * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
    2009 Lynskey R230
    Trek Mountain Track 850

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Long Island, NY
    Posts
    162
    It is awful that you have such a crazy person bothering you. I hope you can find somewhere safe to ride. The idea of driving your bike to another area sounds like the best thing for you at this time. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    3,853
    Quote Originally Posted by Ana View Post
    Yes, but he may have a gun handy....and he is unstable....
    I just can't live in fear, so confrontation is my approach when all other avenues have been exhausted. Seems the only other option is to quit riding.

    Electra Townie 7D

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Little Egypt
    Posts
    1,867
    Hey, I like that idea..............it would be my luck that the wind would be blowing the wrong direction and it would get me instead

    Good luck Staceysue and enjoy your ride. Probably not a bad idea to learn how to haul your bike yourself anyway.........kinda like changing a flat tire the first time.
    __________________
    "We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing." George Bernard Shaw

    Luna Eclipse/Selle Italia Lady
    Surly Pacer/Terry Butterfly
    Quintana Roo Cd01/Koobi Stratus
    1981 Schwinn Le Tour Tourist
    Jamis Coda Femme

  11. #11
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Little Egypt
    Posts
    1,867
    Quitting riding wouldn't be an option.........
    __________________
    "We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing." George Bernard Shaw

    Luna Eclipse/Selle Italia Lady
    Surly Pacer/Terry Butterfly
    Quintana Roo Cd01/Koobi Stratus
    1981 Schwinn Le Tour Tourist
    Jamis Coda Femme

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    53
    May I suggest perhaps arranging a meeting with you (and possibly your family) with the local head of police, or some sort of patrol manager or something? Even if you think you look crazy, the police probably don't think so. You certainly have a very real concern here, and it should not be taken lightly. Good luck!

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Appling, GA
    Posts
    275
    How awful.
    I live in the country too and had an isolated stalking incident while running a few years ago. A neighbor gave me a ride home. I can't imagine having this ongoing issue like you do.

    I would notify the police. Most of us have called to report things over the years. None of yours sounded over the top with the exception of your son's call. But hey, kids do dumb things.

    When I first moved out to the sticks I called 911 to report a fire. I was driving home in the dark and it was smoky all around me. Turned out to be a controlled burn on a farm nearby. It looked like every emergency truck in our county was lined up in the street at our driveway. They were very nice and assured me that it was not a problem.

    After my stalking experience I went to the sheriffs department and filled out a report. I suggest you do the same. I did not call, I physically went to their office. I am sure they will take you serious if you are a real person to them and not just a voice on the phone. I also bought some mace. I had only been carrying a knife.

    We do not have a gun. Not because I am anti-gun but because we have just never gotten one. My husband recently got his permit to carry but still hasn't purchased a gun. We joke that we are the only family in the country with a sprinkler system and no guns. Transplants from the burbs!

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Between the Blue Ridge and the Chesapeake Bay
    Posts
    5,203
    Call the police anyways. And keep calling them every time he threatens you and your family. It's their job to take care of public safety, and this guy certainly seems like a threat. The more calls about him that they receive, the less they can ignore the situation. And to be fair, they might not know about all of his antics if no one calls in about him.

    Best of luck to you.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    403
    Oh, living in the boonies! So fun! I have had a couple of scary run ins with my crazy neighbors way out in the middle of nowhere. Once, I was pretty sure I would have been kidnapped if my husband wasn't driving slowly up and down the road while I was running... why can't people just live and let live?

    I thought of the pepper spray idea too - though that would only work one time. You would get away, but you and your family could probably never walk or ride past him again without him getting very angry. Also, you already know he has a gun, so I'm not sure I would want to enter an arms race with a crazy person. I would absolutely take the other road that he cannot see you on. As far as seeing him trespass, I would call the cops every single time. You could consider getting a restraining order (?) I don't know anything about them. Do you have to confront the individual to get one? I know it wouldn't help, but you would be documenting harassment. Alternatively, I know this seems drastic, but you could consider moving. Feeling safe is so important. If you have to wonder if he's going to show up in your house one day, that will wear on you. I dunno... I know that's extreme, but I thought I would mention it...

    Sorry for your predicament...

 

 

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •