Haven't ridden for 3 days because of a very scary man

[sundial]

I'm not going to automatically assume that the most likely thing is that he's going to attack. If he wanted to, he could have, many tmes already. Why didn't he? There is probably a reason besides "yet".

Tuck, I've been thinking about what you've stated and I've been stewing over this as well. What you have suggested is an interesting approach and could potentially diffuse the situation under the right circumstances.

From the description of the man, my initial thought is this guy's brain may be affected by drug abuse. He doesn't seem to be able to rationalize or process what he deems as a potentially threatening encounter with his neighbors. Instead, he escalates quickly and poses as a threat to not only himself but others as well.

If he is not a victim of substance abuse than he may be chronically mentally ill. Again, if he is experiencing an episode of delusional thoughts he will have difficulty controlling his reactions when encountering individuals--especially if he's paranoid. There is no reasoning with someone when they are escalating--there is only minimizing the situation by 1) not triggering it or 2) reducing it through medical intervention and therapy.

Staceysue, I understand your frustration with having to alter your route but if I were in your shoes I would avoid a chance encounter with this individual. I hope your new routine can offer you peace of mind. Stay safe, enjoy the fresh air, and bask in the beauty of fall.

[Tuckervill]

Until Stacey posted her response with further details, I was willing to fight to the death for my response. But, since she is not just going on hearsay of the neighbors, etc., and more details are added, I now know enough to say, "Stay as far away as possible."

Karen

[sundial]

You are a very diplomatic and cordial person, Karen, and I respect your approach.

[kenyonchris]

Here's a general summary. The National Crime Victims' Center supposedly has a state-by-state analysis, but I can't get to their site, maybe my security settings are too high for them.

"Restraining order" is a general term; a civil protective (or protection) order is a type of restraining order. Violation of a civil protective order is a crime in most states. Some states go so far as to require a particular police response to a report of violation of a CPO.

Any court order has to be issued by a judge. But most states don't have a special procedure for stalking victims to go to court pro se, so as with any court appearance, it's best to be represented by a lawyer.

But as I said - this is mainly academic, since it sounds like staceysue's stalker is likely to be the kind of person who would just be inflamed by receiving a summons, and who would completely ignore a court order.

Most people use "restraining order" when they mean "protective order", so if the term is to be used interchangeably, OK, but what she would want here, should circumstances warrant, is a protective order... all court documents are issued and signed by a judge (and, in some cases, the protective order is issued regardless of whether the victim wants it or not, and remain in place until the judge sees fit or the time elapses, which varies from state to state). Here in Texas, we must respond in a certain way to violations of protective orders in the matters of family violence (which 80% of them are), and, honestly, anyone I come across who has violated it goes to jail. They are issued for a reason (the judge has seen fit to issue it) so I would rather hook someone up for violating a protective order than go back to take an assault report or worse.

Just FYI as to how we respond and to what. Also...a PO is entered into TCIC/NCIC and we know it exists as soon as we identify someone through dispatch. We know who it is for and why it was issued against whom. A civil restraining order, no (obviously). The only thing we can enforce there is violating a court document (at best), and the court documents must be produced. We don't have to actually lay eyes on the PO to enforce it.

From what Stacey has said, I am not sure she has grounds for either...I gave her what I would tell anyone who came to the station and asked me what to do about a similar situation...let us know and be aware, get a CT order if he appears on her property, document, document, document every negative contact with him (harrassment is very difficult to enforce effectively without state mandated documentation), please stay away from handguns, and let us do our job if we need to. That is why we get paid the big bucks.

And bike away....just somewhere else.

[staceysue]

please stay away from handguns, and let us do our job if we need to. That is why we get paid the big bucks.

And bike away....just somewhere else.

I know a lot of police officers - one of my very good friends is a police officer, and I've just got to know a lot of them over the years through working in the ER and stuff. They're wonderful people and I'm sure you're a wonderful person, and they go above and beyond to keep people safe. I am certain that if I dialed '911' they would be in their cars on their way here in the blink of an eye, and they definitely EARN their pay because dealing with all those pain-in-the-butt criminals is a real pain-in-the-butt (that's why I left the ER - because when the criminals aren't in jail they're in the ER trying to scam us out of narcotics).

That being said, though . . . . I have a RIGHT to bicycle where I want to bicycle and no man on this earth has any right to keep me from doing so. No police officer can be beamed to me instantly if I'm in danger. I have gone above and beyond to stay out of this man's reach and not draw his attention, and I will continue to only travel the new route (which, by the way, keeps me out of my favorite cycling area). However, if he finds me on this route I will NOT give up cycling every day! This is my life, I only get one of them, and I want to freaking cycle!!! Loading up my bike, driving somewhere, riding, loading it up again and coming home, then showering and getting ready for work is just not going to happen. I drive 64 miles each way to work and back and I don't have time to waste.

I love police, OK? They're generally really good people. And I respect all of the training you do with your guns and everything and if I could have you with me all of the time, that would be awesome. But - you're not here. Therefore, I've had to do training with MY gun and, though I pray I won't have to use it, I have the right.

What's safer for me? Cycle with a gun or cycle without a gun? Depends on whether or not I use my head. And I wasn't going to go into this on here, but I've seen a lot of people die. I've been in a lot of terrible situations and I'm well-known for being the one person who can be counted on not to panic. My head works pretty darn good.

And I don't live in a place where there are 'innocent bystanders'! I know how to look and make sure that if I miss I won't be hitting somebody's cow or something - but just open up google earth and look up the upper peninsula of Michigan if you want to see where I am. I live in a freaking wilderness. I'm surrounded by thousands of acres of national forest. It's a little bit different than the places where 90% of the word's population live.

Yesterday was the opening day of deer season, so for now I will be doing the dreaded 'load the bike up in the car' thing. I'm listening to guns going off around me from sunrise to sunset until all the freaking tourists go home. From November 15 until ski season every year - that's the only time I'll be loading my bike up in the car.

Hunters - THOSE are people who don't freaking know how to look where they're shooting. Grrr.

[Pax]

staceysue - You live in the UP??? Cool!!! That is one unpopulated place all right, I love visiting up there...no people and no huge highways = heaven!!

[kenyonchris]

you're not here.[/I] Therefore, I've had to do training with MY gun and, though I pray I won't have to use it, I have the right.

Hunters - THOSE are people who don't freaking know how to look where they're shooting. Grrr.

Agreed on that. On of our MTB trails is shared with a public (posted) hunting area...I am amazed as it is within range of homes.

This isn't a gun forum, I brought it up because of statistics. You certainly do have the right to bike where you want, and if you carry legally, carry if you want. I could put on my badge and gun and ride through south Dallas if I wanted, I certainly have the right. But why invite the problem is my point. You shouldn't have to. The fact that he is your neighbor is a problem (I have a problem neighbor myself), and you are probably smart to keep your gun in your home for home protection. My only point was relevant to the BIKE.

My comments are only based on experience and my opinion and the statistical facts regarding firearms...and, having gone through police bike school where we ride and shoot, I have some authority on this (it is very different, your muscles do different things).

But you seem to have a handle on things. Good luck. Stay safe.

[OakLeaf]

I haven't figured out how to embed video here, but here's a link to a YouTube video of me loading my bike into my Prius. HTH.

I had to do the upload twice, because after all this, I closed the hatch at the end of the video and my license plate was clearly visible. D'oh! So I learned a little bit about iMovie just now.

[shootingstar]

I drive 64 miles each way to work and back and I don't have time to waste.

In my last job I had a convoluted work commute --1.5+ hrs. one way. For 3 yrs. Not even by car at all. Distance by the route I took was 80+ kms. round trip daily... a blend of bike, commuter train (get off bike to park it), train, then bus, then walk to worksite in 1 one way. On my way home, I biked a longer distance deliberately for fitness and destressing.

If I had biked all the way, round trip, it would have been a 103+ kms. because of detours due highway sections illegal for cycling. I have done this trip.....on weekends for bike fitness because parts of it is beautiful.

So I understand how demanding commute travel time can be.

As a suggestion,bring your bike and cycle in the workplace area during lunch hr. I have worked for other employers where there were some other employees who did make the effort to fit in fitness bike ride during noon hr. near place of work.

Just a thought.

[staceysue]

having gone through police bike school where we ride and shoot, I have some authority on this (it is very different, your muscles do different things).

But you seem to have a handle on things. Good luck. Stay safe.

Bike AND shoot? You mean, like, shoot while you're on a bike?? heheheheheh now I see where the confusion came in. Nah - I certainly wasn't envisioning myself doing that, even in the worst type of emergency.

[staceysue]

staceysue - You live in the UP??? Cool!!! That is one unpopulated place all right, I love visiting up there...no people and no huge highways = heaven!!

Say ya to da UP, eh?

[staceysue]

I haven't figured out how to embed video here, but here's a link to a YouTube video of me loading my bike into my Prius. HTH.

I had to do the upload twice, because after all this, I closed the hatch at the end of the video and my license plate was clearly visible. D'oh! So I learned a little bit about iMovie just now.

Did you go to all that trouble just for me, OakLeaf? That is so sweet. You make it look so easy and now I'm going to do it too!

I can't cycle on my breaks, ShootingStar, but I appreciate the suggestion. I do get a chance to go to the hospital gym for 15 minutes and do crunches, though - and I'm very grateful for that! It's nice to hear from someone who knows what it's like to commute so far.

I applied for a job with the forest service - only 9.5 miles from my house! If I get it I'll be able to cycle to work every day in less time than it takes me to drive to work now. That would just be so awesome.

[channlluv]

I can't imagine trying to carry a gun on a bike. I can barely manage my cell phone, and I'd be afraid to drop that before I could make any kind of call while I'm riding.

Good luck, Stacey Sue, whatever you decide to do here.

I do hope it involves making a formal report to the police, though. I had a problem last spring that I had tried to ignore for several months, but when the person involved crossed the line and I had to take action, a lawyer friend explained to me that I really didn't have much of a case because I only had single incident (sexual harassment at work) to report, whereas if I'd been making reports on all the previous incidents, and if other women in the office had as well (they hadn't, I asked), then we would have had a pattern of behavior on record that would have established a better case and things would have turned out differently.

You have to establish a pattern of behavior. I told my female colleagues and students to start keeping a record of offenses. Dates, times, details, and to report it. As it was, I couldn't keep working there under the circumstances. so I transferred to the online division, which is so much better for me, I can't even tell you how much happier I am, so I'm the winner anyway, but he's still there, still doing what he does, I'm sure.

The key is establishing the pattern of behavior and that means making formal reports. Call the police. Get your neighbors to call, too. Establish that pattern.

Good luck to all of you.

Roxy

[hoffsquared]

I applied for a job with the forest service - only 9.5 miles from my house! If I get it I'll be able to cycle to work every day in less time than it takes me to drive to work now. That would just be so awesome.

Hope this works out for you! Good luck.

[Tuckervill]

Maybe you can't ride on your breaks, but can you go to town before your shift in plenty of time to take a ride there? Or after?

Karen