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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Bendemonium
    Posts
    9,673

    Talking The calories don't count when . . . . .

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    I can't help it. What are your excuses?

    • The calories don't count when it's your birthday.
    • The calories don't count when you share it with the dog
    • The calories don't count when it's broken (she says reaching into the bottom of the cookie box)


    What's your rationale for indulging? Your illogical reasoning?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Sacramento, CA
    Posts
    127
    Calories don't count when no one else is around to witness them.....including the dog or cat or fish......
    Ride your ride.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Folsom CA
    Posts
    5,667
    The calories don't count when it's broken
    That's because all the calories fall out. *

    (*Lee-ism)

    2009 Lynskey R230 Houseblend - Brooks Team Pro
    2007 Rivendell Bleriot - Rivet Pearl

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Off eating cake.
    Posts
    1,700

    Talking

    Of course they fall out. It's all to do with entropy.

    Don't forget, of course, that a Diet Coke cancels out whatever calories may have been in whatever you had to eat with it.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    DuPage Co IL
    Posts
    865
    The calories don't count when you've riden over 20 miles - glycogen stores must be rebuilt!!!

    They also don't count when you are at the movies - something about the screen action seems to absorb them.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    North Andover, Massachusetts USA
    Posts
    1,643
    Quote Originally Posted by SadieKate
    ...What's your rationale for indulging? Your illogical reasoning?
    Hey - who needs reasoning when it comes to chocolate?
    www.denisegoldberg.com

    • Click here for links to journals and photo galleries from my travels on two wheels and two feet.
    • Random thoughts and experiences in my blog at denisegoldberg.blogspot.com


    "To truly find yourself you should play hide and seek alone."
    (quote courtesy of an unknown fortune cookie writer)

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Albuquerque, NM
    Posts
    3,099
    This one is one of my favs:

    The calories don't count in doughnut holes coz they are Holes, so eat all you want!
    Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand, strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming: "Yeah Baby! What a Ride!"

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Bendemonium
    Posts
    9,673
    Quote Originally Posted by CorsairMac
    The calories don't count in doughnut holes coz they are Holes, so eat all you want!
    Bubba will love this one! Great rationale. They're a hole!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Vernon, British Columbia
    Posts
    2,226
    calories don't count
    people count

    Namaste,
    ~T~

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    Mrs. KnottedYet
    Posts
    9,066
    they don't count when you're eating outside, the calories evaporate.
    Fancy Schmancy Custom Road bike ~ Mondonico Futura Legero
    Found on side of the road bike ~ Motobecane Mixte
    Gravel bike ~ Salsa Vaya
    Favorite bike ~ Soma Buena Vista mixte
    N+1 bike ~ Brompton
    https://www.instagram.com/pugsley_adventuredog/

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    San Francisco Bay Area
    Posts
    9,324
    Nothing counts when I'm in a bad mood.

    V.
    Discipline is remembering what you want.


    TandemHearts.com

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Utah, Gateway to Nevada, not to be confused with Idaho
    Posts
    1,872
    Quote Originally Posted by LBTC
    calories don't count
    people count
    I don't know why, but that made me laugh harder than I have in days.

    I have this illogical/irrrational threshold of 2500. If I've burned 2500 calories, then they don't count. But if I haven't, I ingest the "empty" or perhaps "unnecessary" calories anyway and beat myself up about it...for a little while then I move on (I blame it all on Catholic School).

    Think this may have something to do with my "overtraining problem"?

    Fortunately I'm not a big fan of chocolate. Now, Lay's ORIGINAL potato chips...WATCH OUT. I cannot purchase them otherwise I eat the whole bag.

    tlkiwi: Does caffeine free Diet Coke cancel out more calories than regular Diet Coke?

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Alabama
    Posts
    220

    oh, i like this thread

    They don't count:

    If they are liquid (wine!)
    If you're having your period.
    If, in the instance of cake, pie, etc., you don't cut a whole piece, you just come back for multiple small bites.
    If you don't order dessert, you just eat a bite of someone else's.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    499

    Thread Hijack Alert

    Quote Originally Posted by yellow
    Now, Lay's ORIGINAL potato chips...WATCH OUT. I cannot purchase them otherwise I eat the whole bag.

    Oh yeah I love those "single serving" packages.

    My personal "single servings" are Girl Scout thin mint cookies, frozen, (actually *two servings*) and Pringles Reduced Fat Original Flavor. Yep I eat the whole can. I like the "reduced " (yeah right!) because they are less greasy/more crispy.

    Uhm and microwave popcorn. Is there ANYone who does not eat the WHOLE bag? I am currently into the Paul Newman totally unflavored stuff. Just good corn-y flavor.

    Mmmmm food....

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    499
    Back to the original post...

    Calories don't count if you eat standing up! Everyone know that.

    Actually I have a story...

    My sister, who has always had a problem with her weight, was watching me stand at the kitchen counter and snarf down the above mentioned can of Pringles and goodness-knows-what-else, and commented "They always say the way to loose weight is to sit down, fix a decent meal, and slowly enjoy your food...but that must be wrong because you stay slender..."

    I just looked at her with amazment. The part she completely missed??? The SIX HOUR bike ride I'd just completed.

 

 

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