Need help on message to employees

[7rider]

Hi there
The head of our agency sends out a weekly message to employees, letting folks know what he's been doing, as well as what important things are coming up.
I realize I dropped the ball, and should have had those who put the message together to put something in LAST week (or earlier) about this friday's bike to work day.
However, we thought we'd stick in something for this friday's message saying "thanks to all who participated".
This email goes nationally, although I'm not sure who in our other offices take part in bike to work day organized events. So, I want to put something in that's pretty generic.
Do you have any thoughts on how I can beef this up? It needs to be BRIEF (like 1 short paragraph).

Here's what I have so far:
"I want to congratulate and thank everyone who took part in today's annual Bike to Work Day - 2007. Bike to Work Day caps National Bike to Work week, highlighting the month of May as National Bike Month. Thousands of commuters took to the streets today in a celebration of bicycling as a clean, fun, and healthful way to get to work. I appreciate those who try bicycling to work as an alternative to solo driving."

[LBTC]

Hi, Regina! I do have a few ideas for you...

"I want to congratulate and thank everyone who took part in today's annual Bike to Work Day - 2007. Bike to Work Day caps National Bike to Work week, highlighting the month of May as National Bike Month. Thousands of commuters took to the streets today in a celebration of bicycling as a clean, fun, and healthful way to get to work. I appreciate those who try bicycling to work as an alternative to solo driving."

Feel free to use or not use any of these ideas:

Start with "Congratulations and thank you (or even a big thank you) to everyone...." - it's a little less wordy and more exciting.

Change up the end a little so it says: "Thousands of commuters took to the streets today in a celebration of bicycling as a clean, fun, and healthful alternative to solo driving. In appreciation of those who cycled on this special day, some prizes will be awarded."

Is there any way to make this a tiny bit interactive? Can you invite those who rode to work to email, or fill out a slip and send it to someone? You could have random prizes, or you could have a prize for the division that had the most participants. In fact, don't even decide what you'll award until after you find out how many people participated! Your write up just needs to say something like "let human resources know that you biked to work today. You could win a prize!"

Prize ideas: do you have corporate logo'd items? Any logo'd item would be good, but one that has a sports theme, especially a bike theme would be ideal. The company I work for has water bottles with the corporate logo on them, so that would be an easy give away.

Have fun!

Hugs & butterflies,
~T~

[7rider]

Hi, Regina! I do have a few ideas for you...

Is there any way to make this a tiny bit interactive? Can you invite those who rode to work to email, or fill out a slip and send it to someone? You could have random prizes, or you could have a prize for the division that had the most participants. In fact, don't even decide what you'll award until after you find out how many people participated! Your write up just needs to say something like "let human resources know that you biked to work today. You could win a prize!"

Prize ideas: do you have corporate logo'd items? Any logo'd item would be good, but one that has a sports theme, especially a bike theme would be ideal. The company I work for has water bottles with the corporate logo on them, so that would be an easy give away.

~T~

Thanks. Great ideas!

I can ask about having a drawing for a prize - there's a corporate store at the plaza level of one of our buildings that's loaded with logo'd schwag. Perhaps the front office will okay something out of petty cash. It's kind of 11th hour to put something together. I'm kicking myself that I didn't come up with something earlier.

[LBTC]

Thanks. Great ideas!

I can ask about having a drawing for a prize - there's a corporate store at the plaza level of one of our buildings that's loaded with logo'd schwag. Perhaps the front office will okay something out of petty cash. It's kind of 11th hour to put something together. I'm kicking myself that I didn't come up with something earlier.

Well, two benefits about the lateness of announcing a prize:

you know that people who cycle on Friday are not doing it to get a prize, they didn't know there would be one. That's a good thing.

if you can make their "entries" automatic enough, you should be able to wait and see what kind of participation there was. If it was overwhelming, you might be able to make an argument for multiple prizes or for a bigger better prize. And you'll have at least through next week, or longer, to figure that out!

OH, and don't be worried about last minute stuff - you'll pull it off just fine - pressure does that to us, right? And you'll be able to decide if you want to do more for it next year or not.

Let us know how it goes.

H&B
~T~

[7rider]

Well.....
I ran it up the flagpole, and we'll see who salutes ... as my mom would say.
Thanks for your input!