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  1. #16
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Switzerland
    Posts
    2,032

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    It's good you said something, but it would have been better to talk to the person directly instead of going through the prez.

    I know it's hard but every time you do it, you grow.
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  2. #17
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Oakland, CA
    Posts
    276
    Actually, alpinerabbit, I don't think you can know what would have been "better" for me to do, since I was there, and you were not.

    I did talk to him directly, at least to tell him my knee was a mess and that I was angry he'd deviated from the route. His response was to offer to push me up the hill. When I declined, he got mad at me. He is not a person willing to listen to any criticism whatsoever.

    I know this guy well from having ridden with him every Saturday last summer. Pushing the discussion with him would have been pointless. It was the other group leader who suggested I talk directly to the president, not to the jerk. I am not an avoidant person at all, and will generally speak my mind in a direct manner, when it is appropriate (as evidenced by my direct response to you!).

  3. #18
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Indianapolis, IN
    Posts
    739
    I'm glad to hear you're none worse for the wear today, but like you said that's NOT the point. I would be angry as well as intimidated were I a very new rider to the group and the ride leader take off completely from the stated/mapped route without my prior knowledge possibly leaving me stranded in the middle of nowhere not knowing where I was or how to get back to where I started from. I'm glad you said something to the president of the club. Someone doing something like that wouldn't make me feel very welcome to come back for a second ride. Of course most of the CIBA rides I've gone to locally, I end up riding for the most part by myself and my big gripe is when there are to be SAG stops available and on the rare occasion I don't have ample extra food or water with me because I thought it was to be available the SAG leaves before I get to the stop. It has happened to me a couple times and I did complain to both the people who were listed as being the ride leaders/SAG providers (I actually saw the SAG pull away minutes before I got to the stop on one occasion and rolled up to find nothing but a pile of melting ice where the SAG was to have been) I've also posted my complaints on the local forum for the club where it turns out I wasn't the only one with those concerns. Of course there were those who are/were much like this guy appears to be that say well if you can't keep up why are we supposed to babysit etc. I've mentioned that if they don't want anyone but a certain speed or bike type to come to the rides they need to state that you're on your own as far as support goes.. Here's your map good luck, good riddance
    Don't think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches

  4. #19
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    1,054

    Post

    ace --- sounds you did the right thing. This 'so called' leader thinks he's something - 'going to push you up the hill'. I would be angry too.
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  5. #20
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    S. Dak.
    Posts
    488
    Ace, riding solo doesn't sound so bad after your group ride report. I'm thankful your knee is o'k today.

  6. #21
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    848
    DUDE!

    What a stupid a$$, arrogant mo. Where's the smiley with teeth/fangs??

    This is with the yellow jackets? Seems so outta character for them and seems to go against their whole club philosophy.
    Push the pedal down watch the world around fly by us

  7. #22
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Oakland, CA
    Posts
    276
    Yes, the OYJ is generally a great group. The thing with this leader is he really isn't a bad person, just lacking in empathy/sense or something. I think he thought he was paying us all a big compliment. He said a couple of times that this was the highest level beginner's group he's ever had, so I think he thought by having us ride the harder route, he was saying something positive about us. That's partly why this is so hard....I know he didn't mean any harm. But I really can't give him that degree of control over my life- just letting him decide what route we're going to do every week without conferring with anyone (and I know he'll do just that if the club president doesn't speak to him).

    I think there's some conflict about the club philosophy. The leader said that the point of the Light group is to transition people to better groups. But it's a social riding club, not a competitive club, so I don't really see why if I want to keep riding shorter slower rides why I shouldn't be able to do that.

  8. #23
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Indianapolis, IN
    Posts
    739
    Quote Originally Posted by roguedog View Post
    DUDE!

    What a stupid a$$, arrogant mo. Where's the smiley with teeth/fangs??

    This is with the yellow jackets? Seems so outta character for them and seems to go against their whole club philosophy.
    Here's a good one for this...

    Then there is this one, but I think the first one is more appropriate.
    Don't think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches

  9. #24
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Flagstaff AZ
    Posts
    2,516

    Talking

    Quote Originally Posted by matagi View Post
    The guy sounds like a bit of a jerk, but did you try talking to him about this? Or is he one of those people that treats every suggestion like a personal insult?

    And I disagree - leading a ride, especially a beginner's ride, requires a lot of skill, because what you should be doing as part of the ride is teaching your beginners cycling skills. Any fool can ride in a straight line, but how about emergency braking, bunny hops, bunch etiquette, stuff like that?

    The other suggestion I would make is to take a map so if you decide you can't continue, you at least know how to find your way back.
    Sorry, I just had to say something. "Any fool can ride in straight line" I beg to differ I've seen plenty of fools that can't ride a straight line! LOL

    I know this guys seems like a real jerk, but you should not only talk to your club president, but you should also talk directly to the guy that was leading the ride! Tell him that you are trying to rehabilitate a knee injury, under doctor's orders and would appreciate if he would stick at least to the listed routes. It really can't hurt. Just do this in a constructive manner. If he takes it the wrong way, you have lost nothing.

  10. #25
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Oakland, CA
    Posts
    276
    I did tell him right before the ride I was in pain, recovering from a knee injury, was under doctor's orders not to ride more than 30 miles, not to ride hills...and he then proceeded to lead me on a 38 mile hilly ride.

    Talking to him is an exercise in futility, as I have pointed out several times above. There is no one right answer to every situation- sometimes talking to people directly causes more trouble than it solves.

  11. #26
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    3,151
    Your letter comes across like you're somebody who's had experience with being tactful but straightforward and honest. I know a fair number of people - who are good coaches for the right people - who sincerely believe that the "aversive" approach is the way to go to tuffen ya up. It's not good to put 'em in charge without an "out" for all the folks who *don't* want/need that schtick.
    About the only time folks have seen me angry has been when a ride leader has talked the "nobody will be dropped" talk ... and then didn't believe that no, honestly, there really are people who ride at 11 mph and that is appropriate for them. Our last Tuesday first ride of the season averaged 8.9 mph. and it was the right speed.

  12. #27
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Oakland, CA
    Posts
    276
    Thanks, Geonz. That's exactly right- he's trying to "help" by toughening us up. But a community beginner's ride is not the place to do it.

    This was tough for me, because I am more a "deal with things directly and on the spot" kind of gal, but this guy is so difficult to deal with (evidenced by the fact that the other ride leader didn't even want to say anything, even though she also has knee problems and was really, really pissed off), and I was so furious (I was crying tears of rage for about 5 miles), that it was clear to me that the best I could do would be talk to the person who's responsible for the leaders.

    I am really hoping I don't face major attitude next Saturday, but I'm a big girl (both literally and figuratively), and I can take it (and dish it out, if I'm forced to).

  13. #28
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    I'm the only one allowed to whine
    Posts
    10,557
    Whatever his motivation, it just seems utterly wrong to me that he deviated from the posted ride route.

    That just bugs the beejeebers out of me!
    "If Americans want to live the American Dream, they should go to Denmark." - Richard Wilkinson

 

 

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