How did you meet your SO?

[Jen12]

How did you all meet your significant others? I seem to be surrounded by women wherever I go lately. I'm in a profession dominated by women, for a long time I was with a running group that grew to be women only, and most of my friends are women. I just have no clue how to meet men. And since I'm dancing along the edge of 40, many men my age are already taken. There have to be some out there that are available....where are they?

[indysteel]

I met my husband through another online cycling forum. Local forum members had gotten together a time or two to socialize, but I'd never been able to join them. Brian and I talked about meeting on our own. Perhaps there was a bit of agenda to that on both our parts, but it was really intended more platonically.

He is a number of years younger than me, and frankly, I just didn't seriously consider him a possibility. But we did ultimately meet (our first meeting was postponed due to an epic flood in Central Indiana). We became friends and it eventually morphed into a relationship. I had a lot of misgivings based on our age difference, but in some ways that worked in our favor because it kept me from getting overly ga-ga(and slightly nutty) like I so often had in the past. We took it slowly, but once the fundamentals were there, it sort of took off rather quickly. We met in June of 2008 and married in February of 2010.

I was about your age when I met Brian, so I feel for where you are. The best thing I can suggest is to just do what makes you happy. Hopefully, those things will allow you to meet others who then see you at your most vibrant. There are a lot of male cyclists so that's not a bad way to go. I was never big on fix-ups, but if you have friends whose judgment you trust, it's not a bad route to pursue. I don't have anything against internet dating either; you just have to use good judgment and safe practices.

[Eden]

Can't be of much help... I met my husband at orientation in college... 21 years ago

[indysteel]

Can't be of much help... I met my husband at orientation in college... 21 years ago

You mean you totally missed out on bad fix-ups from well-intentioned but delusional friends? Lucky! Boy, I could write a book on them!

[KnottedYet]

I met mine on TE.

[jlnc]

Jen12, I'll let ya know when I find him....

[Trek420]

I met mine on TE.

That's funny, I met mine on te too.

[TxDoc]

I met mine on TE.

Are you kidding? I mean, this TE??? Wow! Congrats to both!
I need to drop the bike forums and start hanging out here more often!!!

To the OP, I have no good advice to offer - haven't found Mr. Perfect yet.

Maybe I need to go sit in the park and wait...

[Jen12]

You mean you totally missed out on bad fix-ups from well-intentioned but delusional friends? Lucky! Boy, I could write a book on them!

Hahaha...the friends who say, "You have so much in common! You're both single!" Those friends?

[indysteel]

Hahaha...the friends who say, "You have so much in common! You're both single!" Those friends?

Yep; those friends. It pays to ask a lot of questions before saying yes. Even then, it's best to keep your expectations really, really low.

@Knot: I didn't that you met Trek on TE! That's awesome!

[ny biker]

You mean you totally missed out on bad fix-ups from well-intentioned but delusional friends? Lucky! Boy, I could write a book on them!

I am 47 and never married. Not once has any of my friends tried to fix me up with anyone.

Not sure if this means there is something wrong with me or the friends...

[jessmarimba]

Not married, but met the boyfriend at a trail race that we both decided to run at the last second (it was a duathlon and a number of mountain bikers needed runners for relay teams in order to get series points).

I moved out of town a week later, but things seem to be going ok so far!

[Marquise]

My husband bought his daughter a horse, which was too much for her to handle, so he started riding. My good friend had a horse in the same barn and one night he asked if he could watch her ride. They chatted and when he said he couldn't find any good women to date (after she'd made it clear she was attached), she thought of me and grilled him to see if he liked things I like. She told me everything she knew about him and said she'd tell him about me and give him my e-mail if I wanted. He sent me a message in which he expressed himself well (important to me), we spoke on the phone, and made a date. We hit if off that first night. We had a lot of common likes even before I discovered I love cycling.

That was the one and only time a friend offered to set me up with a guy. She's a real networker and much more extroverted than me. She met her new love through another friend. The few single guys I know have too many negatives for me to want to set them up with my friends. I tried to open myself up to more possibilities and put out feelers as I got older but it can be frustratingly hard to meet someone. Good luck!

[indysteel]

I am 47 and never married. Not once has any of my friends tried to fix me up with anyone.

Not sure if this means there is something wrong with me or the friends...

Count yourself lucky. While it can sometimes work out, it can also lead to plenty of awkwardness because your friend is sort of in the middle of it.
I've actually never tried to fix someone up.

[blue_angel]

I am 47 and never married. Not once has any of my friends tried to fix me up with anyone.

Not sure if this means there is something wrong with me or the friends...

Nobody's ever tried to fix me up either. But I'm actually kind of grateful for that because, from what I've seen, my friends have terrible taste.