Thread Drift

[lph]

For anyone with teenagers - ouch, this is good:
http://nymag.com/news/features/adolescence-2014-1/

[OakLeaf]

My car's iPod input has been going intermittently haywire for a year and a half. Very often, like three to ten times an hour, it'll cut out momentarily and then resume playing. Four or five times, it's just plain refused to load the device, gotten stuck at some step of loading. Our small-town dealer has tried several times to run it down, but when it won't malfunction in their presence, it's been tough. They told us to just bring it in without an appointment ... but if we're in the car, we're going somewhere and don't have time to stop at the dealer! Last time, it quit working for days, then miraculously started working again ten miles from the dealership.

Today it quit again. The nearest Toyota dealer, a much bigger dealership than the one I usually work with, was just a mile from my destination, so I went there when I was finished with my appointment. Their electronics specialist was in the house, he knew exactly what the problem was, a known issue on some cars of that model year, and the part has been ordered under warranty.

With all the big things that have gone very badly over the past two years, it just makes me inordinately happy to have this little minor annoyance on the way to being resolved. I feel like celebrating!

[malkin]

For anyone with teenagers - ouch, this is good:
http://nymag.com/news/features/adolescence-2014-1/

I only read the first page...AND maybe this is something new, but only because these parents are paying attention to their teenaged kids.

When I was in high school in an affluent southern California suburb, the parents were involved in their own world of extra-marital affairs and drug experimentation and whatever else and only paid attention to the kids when absolutely necessary. Siblings and friends provided general support and took care of transportation--especially those late night too-drunk-to-drive rides. Parents were reserved for events involving tow trucks or law enforcement.

[Crankin]

I read the whole thing. I agree with all of it.
Basically, modern parents let too much of their self worth get tied up with their kids. Then, when the kids start to go through the normal separation stage in adolescence, they freak out.
I was very lucky. Both of my kids had their moments, but no one ever was brought home by the police. And hey, my older son's HS yearbook stated that their class favorite car was "the back of an Acton Police SUV."
I fully expected them to want more freedom as they got older, and used the model my parents used. As long as I see decent (not perfect) behavior, then I will give you the same privileges I had. Thus, my kids were going into the city on their own at age 14-15, and we let them stay by themselves at home for a weekend when we went to NYC when my older son was able to drive (the neighbors, though were put on watch for cars in front of the house). But, my kids both had jobs from age 14 on, after 2-3 years of babysitting. Horrors, they had to work! One had cycling to keep him out of trouble and the other had music. Like I said, it wasn't perfect, but the key was both DH and I had our own lives. Work, interests, and going out socially without the kids almost every week of our married life.

[marni]

totally agree with you. Fortunately none of mine ever saw the back of the Acton police cruiser. If they had they would have been grounded for life minus all privileges. As you say, all three of them worked from 14 on, first babysitting, gardening, snow shoveling, yard work, housework etc for me and for neighbors and then when they were old enough, as baggers at Roche brothers and or kitchen work at the Pizza hut. They were all in the Acton HS band and thus had a great adult support community, and all three were scouts. We were truly lucky to live where we lived, when we did. I have no idea how parents do it today between the internet and the drugs and the drink. But then my primary job was to raise them with the help and support of my husband. Their job was to go to school, get the grades and make a positive contribution to the family.

I figure the fact that we both worked and had our own solitary and group pursuits must have mad it easier for them to follow the same general route.

All that not withstanding we came on on the lucky side because just because you do everything right as you perceive it doesn't always mean that it works out that way.

[crazycanuckoz]

...i think the cold temps we experienced Chicago have affected my brain..i've signed up for an ultra in june... ....

My Canuck friends told me i'm a wimp as i found -15c a bit cold along with the #*#**# snow over two days.....Yup, give me +30C..

[shootingstar]

CCanuckoz, you must be gettin' "soft". Weren't you originally an Albertan resident long ago before Aussieland?

We've had -5 degrees C to 8 degrees C lately. However yes, we've had some -25 to -31 degrees C in past few weeks with snow, etc.

[OakLeaf]

Ha, CC! What's the distance? Have fun with your training!