Cycling and your relationship.

[indigoiis]

So. Here is a question for all of you:

How has your newfound passion for riding affected your relationship with your significant other, if at all?

[NJBikeGal]

He's become much more affectionate towards my legs!! Just kidding. Actually, my DH spends his summers at the Jersey shore (working on an Ocean rescue patrol), so I'm sort of a warm-weather-bachelorette...riding to my heart's content. He's very supportive of my riding and knows how happy it makes me. But, it is tough when I want to spend time with him, but have a team workout or long weekend ride to do.

[mimitabby]

i started riding seriously because HE liked the sport. Got him off his butt again
and got me fit.
win-win

[Geonz]

I've been carrying a torch for a fellow rider for lo' these many years Fortunately, riding is a great way to channel unrequited passions...

[indigoiis]

i started riding seriously because HE liked the sport. Got him off his butt again
and got me fit.
win-win

This is why I started - he used to bike years ago and I figured it would help re-motivate him. And so far, it's been working EXCEPT:

Yesterday, we went on an 18 mile ride. About half way through, we got passed by a club ride who were, according to DH, "not even trying." Of course, DH wanted to stay with me, and because my upper gears are not working properly, I have to coast on the downhills until I get it fixed (otherwise it's just spinning.) Mind I am on a hybrid, doing pretty well if you ask me (around 14 mph) and he says, "I could have ridden with them..." (if, of course, he didn't have me tagging along.) Then he said, "I'd ride with a club/shop again if I had the time."

What was yesterday, then? Chopped liver? He had the time to ride with me!

I am wondering whether my whole new interest in this - and the accompagnying weight loss since I started exercizing and reducing calories in March - is making him ... JEALOUS???

[mimitabby]

why don't you ask him to fix your bike? or... take it to the shop and have THEM fix it. why let a mechanical ruin your day/date?

whenever my DH is passed by someone he thinks he could pass, it drives him crazy. Sometimes when he's riding with me, I'll say go ahead.. and he'll take off and do his testosterone thing
and get it out of his system... and then he comes back. (this doesn't happen often, but it DOES happen) so perhaps your DH IS jealous because HE really can't keep up with those dudes anymore!

[equus123]

why don't you ask him to fix your bike? or... take it to the shop and have THEM fix it. why let a mechanical ruin your day/date?

whenever my DH is passed by someone he thinks he could pass, it drives him crazy. Sometimes when he's riding with me, I'll say go ahead.. and he'll take off and do his testosterone thing
and get it out of his system... and then he comes back. (this doesn't happen often, but it DOES happen) so perhaps your DH IS jealous because HE really can't keep up with those dudes anymore!

lol, no offense, but this is the exact reason I can't stand going on men's group rides. they can never stop their testosterone and bravado from getting the best of them and some of us (women or newer riders) are pushed way harder than the ride is supposed to be. it's a stupid pissing contest and it happens almost 80% of the time....

[Grog]

I think my sweet partner and soon-to-be-husband and I would not have a relationship if not because of cycling. That's what got us started talking together, dating, and eventually riding together!

That doesn't mean it's all blissful and easy though. He is a MUCH MUCH stronger rider than I am, and values fitness more than scenery. So we both have to do compromises. It doesn't always work, but we're getting better at riding together (and knowing when we should NOT ride together).

He loves my tan lines but the muscles even more.

[mimitabby]

lol, no offense, but this is the exact reason I can't stand going on men's group rides. they can never stop their testosterone and bravado from getting the best of them and some of us (women or newer riders) are pushed way harder than the ride is supposed to be. it's a stupid pissing contest and it happens almost 80% of the time....

I've noticed that longer harder rides tend to equalize stuff. We rode with some 20 something year old guys on a harder ride. At the end, they figure it out.

but yes, you're right. it can be downright stupid.

[Crankin]

I started riding because my husband started riding because our son started riding and racing. It took me about 2-3 years before I "consented" to let my husband set up his old mtb for me and buy me my first pair of shorts and a jersey. My first ride was about 6 miles and he had to push me up a small hill with the back of his hand...
I thought I was fit, after many years of aerobics and gym activities, but i had slacked off a bit and had gained weight. My husband was very patient with me. I got a road bike after 2 years and now we pretty much ride together all of the time. What happened was that I got much faster and confident and he doesn't feel the need to hammer all of the time. Sure, i will never be as strong as he is, but he does his faster rides when he commutes to work. So he'll average around 17-17.5 when he's alone and when we ride together, our average will be anywhere between 14.5 and 16.5, depending on terrain and how we feel. I don't think I would want to be out riding for 2-3 hours at a time and leave my husband at home. Riding is pretty much our whole lifestyle and almost everything we do revolves around it. Some of our friends think we're "over the top" because we're together so much, but this is the way it is...

[Kano]

He went out with a friend one day, then "talked me into" going with them the next time they went out. Little did he know what he was getting himself into!

We ride together a lot, though sometimes it works better for us to ride alone. Like, I can get out in the cool of the morning during the week, and have been working a lot of Saturdays this summer, when he's more free to get out.

It's turned into another "play-like" activity that we are enjoying together now that the nest is pretty well emptied!

Karen in Boise

[amymisk]

My husband and I started riding together and we enjoy it. Although, I don't ride with him all the time and actually prefer some alone time on the bike. His pace is faster than mine. When we do ride together it is an easy ride for him and I use the ride to push harder than I would otherwise, so it works out.

We enjoy riding and it gives us something to do. We are planning our 10th anniversary in October as a riding trip to Hawaii. So, our riding makes the relationship easier.

[teigyr]

It's made us even busier but that's a good thing

I had ridden a lot before I met DH but had been on a hiatus for a while. DH is very active and when we met, we hiked and walked a lot. I had two bikes so he started riding my spare then he got his own shortly thereafter.

We were at a bike shop with a friend yesterday and DH was looking at bike toys and clothes. My friend, who knew me before DH, was surprised that it wasn't ME buying bike things! I know how it feels though, once you get the cycling bug bike shops become very dangerous.

[lauraelmore1033]

Hubby and I are the classic case of opposites attracting. He's an engineer and I'm an artist and we have few interests in common. Cycling happens to be an area where we can find common ground. He's not into it as much as I am, but it's an activity we can do together that is mutually enjoyable for the most part (as opposed to my dragging him to museums and boring him with art talk and his dragging me to car related events and boring me with mechanical talk).

[East Hill]

Mr. East Hill's always been an outdoorsy kind of guy, and likes to get out into the woods. So, it was (relatively) easy to persuade him to get a mountain bike and get him used to that. A bit harder to get him onto the road bike, and he's still not very comfortable with it (mind you, he's got a 1980 Schwinn LeTour, so it has stem friction shifters).

He rides with me at least once a week. He didn't make it for Sunday's ride, but he did go with me around the reservoir today--so we did a bit over 13 miles on the mountain bikes.

He likes riding the mountain bike, and he likes the reservoir (it's a great spot to see deer). It works out pretty well, actually.

East Hill