I had absolutely no idea how to fix a flat and I had no one to ask about it when I got my first one. Sounds like you already have the right idea but getting the tire back on is fighting you. Here's what I did to figure this all out:

Watch this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=79cmQlACL6s

If the link doesn't work, you can just go to youtube and type "repair puncture" in the search box.

It's kind of a goofy video, but I followed the instructions and next thing you know, I patched my tube, got everything put back together, and was up and running again.

I did find that the hardest part was getting the tire back on. I used one of the tire levers to push it into place. If you have brand new tires, it seems to be harder. Now that I've had my front tire off four times, it's a lot looser. I'm hoping four flats in as many months will be enough to last me a while!

I was really frustrated too, but I did it. You can too! Good luck!!!