...has anyone made them?

I feel like I want to rewind last night and change what I know now, then.

I went on a night group ride last night. I got a little confused on who was the sweeper. On the descents, I was able to keep up with the group without a problem. Then I reached a hilly section. I knew I had to slow down because my HR was getting erratic (going out too hard). So I did just slowed down a little bit, then I totally lost them. There was no one with me, and no one behind me (at least I thought). I got up the steady climbing section then I decided to just go back to the starting point because I did not want to hold the group back. Because they were at least one to two miles ahead of me...I couldn't see anyone.

I texted the ride leader and told her that, "I was sorry that I couldn't keep up with the group. No sweepers were with me (thinking that I was last). Perhaps I'm not ready for this ride." I was texted back, "You gave up too easily. They were behind you. You were faster than the sweepers. Next time hang in there."

I felt really stupid. 12 miles in for a 30 mile ride, I had NO idea that the sweepers were a few minutes or so behind me. I wished I waited for them and looked. I've been kicking myself since last night for doing for at least look and wait.

Hope I can go back on that group ride. Should I email the ride leader and explain or just let it go? I've been riding with the club for two years, and it just feels like I should know all of this by now...but this is my second night ride with the faster folks...

Any one made any stupid/silly mistakes on group rides? I just need to feel better...lol.