I really appreciate everybody's replies. Thanks for the input. I'm certainly not trying to belittle anybody's wish to feel attractive, I think we all do, just doodling around with the idea of what goes into being attractive. Some random thoughts:

are men more relaxed about their looks, or is this just not manly to admit you care? you can tell a male friend (not all, I guess, but some, in the right situation) that they could use a haircut, or should lose some weight - saying the same thing to a woman is mostly considered a huge faux pas. Not to mention a mistaken pregnancy

would you be offended by someone saying that at 50 you're not as cute, or trusting as when you were 20?

Did you ever switch over from wanting to be thought of as older, to wishing you were younger?

- late, gotta go sleep