Sadly, it's closer to an hour because of where in the city they meet. I do agree with you in theory, but it's hard to make that drive since I make a good part of it every weekday, too. It's a drag, but I need to suck it up.
Printable View
I did move across the country, Fredwina. It was 21.5 years ago. We gave up good jobs, a house in a desirable suburb, and a wonderful group of friends. We did it for our kids; and the fact that despite our great friends, we saw the political writing on the wall in AZ and couldn't deal with it.
By choice, and back to the state where I grew up, after 20+ years in FL and AZ.
But, there were still a few moments (won't admit this to many) that I cried, because I really missed my friends. I don't think I can ever replace the friends I made when my kids were in preschool at the Tri City JCC in Tempe. No matter how long it is between visits, I go back and it's the same.
I have 4 close friends here, and lots and lots of acquaintances made through work, cycling, volunteering at my temple, teaching aerobics, and grad school. Some of these acquaintances were "friends" at one point, but our paths diverged. In fact, when Hirakukibou and I started riding together 2 summers ago, she was amazed how I knew people in every town around here, in all of the coffee shops we went in, even riding down streets, 2-3 towns away, people often recognized me and we stopped. I feel like I "belong," in the general area.
However, I think living in AZ, where new people moved in all of the time, and it was accepted practice to go right up and invite them over or out for dinner, spoiled me. When I tried doing that here, it was met with total rebuffs.I hate to say it, all of my close friends are not native New Englanders, even though I am! We met our closest friends 7, almost 8 years ago when we signed up for a ride she was leading. Unbeknownst to us, we had sat next to them in spin class for years at the health club and seen them riding out on the roads. They lived 5 miles from us! They have no kids and our kids were out of the house pretty much by then, and it was a perfect match.
(((((((Indy)))))))
Just thank goodness for my cycling clubs, or I'd be as isolated as you are. I'm not really close with any of them, but at least they're other human beings I can talk to.
Oddly enough, Facebook has brought me closer to a few people who were only a little more than acquaintances before I FB friended them. Sometimes it's easier to open up and take risks about the things I care about with that bit of distance, and things can shake out in surprising ways.
page 1000! woo hoo!:)
Crankin, I think all relos are no fun, but literally going some where you've never been before can be scary(which is what I did when I came to Albany from Calif about 2 months ago) At least so far the career side is working out on this latest move. Still workiing on reassembling the rest of my networks
You should get rain tomorrow - it's raining here now
Just nuked a new spam:
"Feather -like hair disorder , and avant-garde should be consistent with the rough earrings "
I hate when I have feather - like hair disorder....
Some people pay good money to have feathers put in their hair.
I have made 16 international moves in the 36 years of marriage. The last one from overseas to Texas has been the hardest because my youngest child left for college at the same time and so I had no ties into the community via PTA or school events or sports.
I have a few connections with the handweavers and hand spinners, and a total of two people as sporadic once or twice a year riding companions. Actually my strongest community connection for the past five years have been with my trainers at the gym, my doctor who I see 2x a year and the oncologist/breast surgeon who although she is a sweet and caring woman, I have seen more often than I would have liked.
I have learned to revel in my solitary strength, but it is very lonely at times.
marni
Yeah, I don't get this feather thing.
Fredwina, I agree, your circumstances for moving were much harder than mine, but I must say the inclusion of 20 years in between leaving and returning, and the fact that I moved back to a different area in MA, not the city I grew up in, made it feel like I was living someplace slightly familiar, but not the same. It was compounded by the fact that we just could not afford to live in the place I grew up in, which we might have done, even though it was not close to where DH was working. We ended up living in a very small and rural town on the NH border where, ah, let's just say I was in the minority in a lot of ways. For 6 years, I pretended I didn't really live there, by participating in activities in other parts of my life. We finally moved to where we originally wanted to live, when our kids were in middle school and stayed there until we impulsively bought the house we are in now.
Boy, I can relate to that. My current home is just not a good fit. What's ironic is that in the first decade of my parents' marriage, they lived her, too, and my mother hated it as much as I do now. I credit her for holding her tongue when we announced that we were moving here ourselves. I know I underestimated just how different it would be from Indy. That's not to say that Indy is heaven on earth, but it is at least diverse enough to support a great number of my interests and there are plenty of like-minded people here.
All of this is food for thought though. I still fantacize about moving away from Indiana, but I have to wonder whether I could withstand that kind of change. I will have to think long and hard about that.
On a different note, this morning's spammers sure dug up some old threads in which to post. I don't get that part of their MO.
I think they do a search on anything that might be vaguely related to their product and post in those threads. I didn't read the spam and I don't even remember what today's threads were, but there's usually a common theme.
Marni, how are you doing - if you don't mind my asking?
I'm so angry I'm shaking.
The bosses have treated my honey like a piece of garbage for the last four and half years. She's worked her *** off to fix a broken division, all forms of measurement attest to her success, but the people who run this place are so threatened by someone accomplishing what they couldn't, that they just crap on her at every opportunity.
Her last day is next Wednesday and not one of them has done the professional courtesy of wishing her well in her new job; they won't even send out the usual general announcement that someone is leaving so co-workers can stop by and wish her well.
I really loathe these ignorant sub humans... and I have to keep working here with them. Hope I can keep my mouth shut.