Really... I just need to vent...

Just about every Tuesday night at 7:15 my phone rings with an automated message from the principal to the students. I go to bed at 7 and get up at 3:30. Many times I am actually asleep when the phone rings. I've asked him several times to take me off the call list and have always gotten blown off. "You need to be on the list in case of an emergency." "It's a tedious process to take you off the list."

This past week, Thom decided that it was time to call the district office and see if this could be changed. After talking to a few people, he learned that these lists are maintained by each school. So he called my school and talked to the student records person who gave him the same runaround that I got. He got annoyed and told her that these weekly calls made him want to call the principal at 1 in the morning.

Well that didn't go over very well and I got called into the principal's office and chewed out for what my husband said. So, I'm upset about that.

But what I'm really bothered by is that while my principal became furious at the mere thought of his family being disturbed, he has no problem with weekly disturbing my family.

Yes, I could change my number (a royal hassle) or just unplug my phone every Tuesday, but really I shouldn't have to. I'm sure the system allows multiple lists since the superintendent uses it for calls just to staff and to everyone.

And I don't buy, "You need to be on the list for emergencies." I can see the school from my house. I think I'd know if it burnt down. :D

I'm glad I have two weeks off. I worked very hard to avoid him on Friday, because I just had nothing professional to say and I'm really not good at letting things go...

Veronica

That just stinks.

2 suggestions:

1) Can you cell company just block that number? Since it's an automated thing, they might be able to if the number is consistent.

2) You *could* port your number to Google Voice, get a new cell number and have the Google Voice ring your cell simultaneously. You can then set up "rules" for when Google Voice rings your cell (i.e., not after 6:45).

I'm impressed with your schedule. Mine is completely skewed the other way.

heh, Blueberry, good ideas!
mine were not constructive so I will not share them.

Veronica, I would be beside myself as you are....

I would have been BS.
I don't have any real constructive advice, but I am sure part of the reluctance to change is that he cannot imagine your schedule. And, I also know from experience that schools don't like it when your DH stands up for you. Teachers are usually wimps when it comes to stuff like this and you dared to question.
I'd turn off my phone or unplug it if it's a land line and then schedule a mtg with him when you have thought about it more. Educators are not good at having difficult conversations (meaning him) so my bet is he will listen.

Oh dear, If its always the same time, I suggest throw a big down pillow over the phone to muffle the sound.

One of my geeky friend have recorded the distinct sound when the phone company tells you that the phone is no longer in service. And its the first thing the answering machine plays. He says he doesn't get any robo calls or unsolicited annoying calls. Works like a charm he says.

I think the school robo call system will recognize and remove you from the list automatically. :D

If you need that .wav file, I can ask my friend for it. and send it to you. then you can play it on your computer when you create your new outgoing answer message. \It has to be the first thing on the message.

Veronica, your name is no longer "Princess Zippy" but just "Princess." :D

Just how would you see leaking gas pipelines (an increasing occurence in California), a leaking roof, vandalism that needs to be investigated before school is open, a violent event that might shut the school for a while (this IS Antioch), etc. I consider the call list a courtesy.

Losing 15 mins of sleep one time a week is so onerous that your husband physically confronts co-workers? I know Thom so I know he had no intent of physical intimidation, but I bet there are plenty of crazy spouses out there who might have.

I can't imagine Bubba talking to my co-workers or management about a work-related issues unless I was unable to do so my self. I can't think of one place I've worked where I would NOT have been chewed out for his actions.

Just my take on it. Save your energy for when you lose sleep over truly critical issues, a loved one's health for instance. Loosen up, lighten up and chill.;)

7 - 8 pm is prime calling time for the people who call with the recorded messages about how we should sign up for a different mortgage. :rolleyes:

YES we're on the do not call lists, and I know those exempt the charity and political calls (which we also get), but why the hell are we always getting calls at this time to readjust our mortgage?

It's gotten so I don't even answer our home phone in the evening. :mad: Maybe I will use that .wav file idea.

Can I have a copy of the wav file too? :D

My school has two list for the automated calls - "students/parents only" and "everyone". They should be able to format it so that the Tuesday night calls just go to students/parents. Seems they are being a bit uncooperative.

V - I would be upset too. I don't care if you're sleeping, playing on the interwebs or whatever. A person has a right to not be disturbed if that is their wish.

What kind of info is he passing on to the students every week on Tuesday that can't be shared with the kids in school? I'm just wondering if the students/families ignore the calls also....if so, when a real emergency comes, they may not listen to the message???

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Originally Posted by SadieKate

Just how would you see leaking gas pipelines (an increasing occurence in California), a leaking roof, vandalism that needs to be investigated before school is open, a violent event that might shut the school for a while (this IS Antioch), etc. I consider the call list a courtesy.

Those calls would be a courtesy. The weekly call reminding parents to pick their students up on time is not.

I know Thom so I know he had no intent of physical intimidation, but I bet there are plenty of crazy spouses out there who might have.

There was no physical intimidation.

I can't imagine Bubba talking to my co-workers or management about a work-related issues unless I was unable to do so my self. I can't think of one place I've worked where I would NOT have been chewed out for his actions.

My boss had on the multiple times I asked him to remove me from the list, given the impression that this was a district decision. The district office works the same hours I do and I cannot just stop teaching in the middle of the day to call them. And since these calls are as disruptive to Thom's schedule as they are to mine, it does affect him.

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Veronica

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Originally Posted by Penny4

What kind of info is he passing on to the students every week on Tuesday that can't be shared with the kids in school? I'm just wondering if the students/families ignore the calls also....if so, when a real emergency comes, they may not listen to the message???

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It's all about attendance. Every Wednesday is an early release day and parents don't pick their kids up on time. He does add in other things, PTA meetings and fund raising information.

I'm sure many families ignore the calls. But it's much easier to do this blanket announcement, rather than just deal with the parents who consistently pick their kids up late.

Veronica

Oooo, snap.

I'm finding life is to short to get worked up about stuff like this. Yes, it's annoying, yes, they could find another way to do it and so on.

If it were me, I'd turn off the ringer, take a deep breath, breathe the serenity prayer and go to bed. IE, is this the hill you want to die on?

Oh, I hate automated calls of any kind. A list for emergency purposes should be kept strictly for real emergencies. Anything else, you should be able to opt out of. My city has created one and they started using it for snow, power outages... not real emergencies. I was able to get my phone removed.

Irulan's comment reminded me of the "Serenity now!" episode of Seinfeld:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEMHt...eature=related

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Originally Posted by Irulan

IE, is this the hill you want to die on?

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Wow - I really like this concept - a lot. This has a broad application. Thanks.

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Originally Posted by maillotpois

Wow - I really like this concept - a lot. This has a broad application. Thanks.

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Heh, I got it from the mom of (another) strong willed child.

I had a great app on my Blackberry called Iblocker. I could set it to hang up on the caller or send it straight to voicemail. It wouldn't even ring just throw them into my voicemail. Is that an option? I got tired of my phone ringing at work with robodialing phishing scams. Being on the do not call list didn't help and even though I filed a complaint every time with the FCC I wanted something to just make it stop.

I know there are bigger hassles in life but when you're feeling disrespected it gets stressful.

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Originally Posted by Irulan

Heh, I got it from the mom of (another) strong willed child.

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Ah. I have a lot of those hills. Thanks. ;)

Hmm. I appreciate the sentiment. But personally, I don't like talking on the phone, I value my free time very highly and my sleep even more, my house is my space, and if I were to receive work-related calls at home in the evening it had better damn well be an emergency.

So for me, I guess this could be the hill I was willing to die on ;)

Seriously, I would probably get another phone number, and turn off the "work" phone when I went to bed.

I feel for you, V. My stepmother loves to call around 10 pm on Fridays, when I wake up at 5 am Sat. Drives me crazy. I've asked her not to call then, but that hasn't worked.

I turn off my ringer, but I'm old school, and have an actual answering machine on the land line for call screening, so I can still hear her message. Oh, and sometimes, if I don't answer my land line, she leaves the message, "Oh, I guess you're out. I'll try you on your cell." Then she calls my cell. :rolleyes:

These kind of annoyances can cause as much or more stress than the "bigger" things in life, so if you can't get the solution you like (for them to stop calling) you have to make a compromise, like turning off your phone. It's not the ideal solution, but compromises never are.

Veronica, this fascinates me. We have an emergency call system at the school where I work and it is never used unless-- you guessed it-- there's an emergency. They test it once a year and warn staff and families of the testing via e-mail beforehand. All other news and announcements for families are sent through electronic newsletters.

It seems like overkill to me to use it weekly for BS. Like others have said, it also makes it less effective in the case of a real emergency or urgent situation. Last year we had a suspicious package left in a suspicious place so we had to dismiss the kids early... imagine if parents ignored the call because they got the calls so often? My goodness.

I always filter stuff like this through this filter:
Can I control this? yes/no
OK, so then what part CAN I control?

For this situation-
Can I control the principal, the school policy, the district policy etc? Well, if the answer is yes, go for it.
A more likely "no", or not without a whole lot of hassle and stress... then, what parts I can I control
My reaction - how much of an annoyance am I going to choose this to be?
My actions - what can I do to protect myself, change my environment etc., with a minimum of stress?

Face it, not a huge percentage of the population goes to bed at 7 PM. Wouldn't the phone be getting turned off anyway? Turning it off seems way simpler to me than taking on district policy. Turning off the phone puts a person in control of incoming calls, instead of trying to stop them at the source.

I don't turn off my phone, but I do have caller ID. It's a huge peace of mind... looking at the phone and choosing to not pick it up for whatever reason, knowing that if they really want to talk to me they can leave a message.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Irulan

I always filter stuff like this through this filter:
Can I control this? yes/no
OK, so then what part CAN I control?

For this situation-
Can I control the principal, the school policy, the district policy etc? Well, if the answer is yes, go for it.
A more likely "no", or not without a whole lot of hassle and stress... then, what parts I can I control
My reaction - how much of an annoyance am I going to choose this to be?
My actions - what can I do to protect myself, change my environment etc., with a minimum of stress?

Face it, not a huge percentage of the population goes to bed at 7 PM. Wouldn't the phone be getting turned off anyway? Turning it off seems way simpler to me than taking on district policy. Turning off the phone puts a person in control of incoming calls, instead of trying to stop them at the source.

I don't turn off my phone, but I do have caller ID. It's a huge peace of mind... looking at the phone and choosing to not pick it up for whatever reason, knowing that if they really want to talk to me they can leave a message.

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+1

You rattled off all the major points taught in a stress relief class. For free! :p

And, I am sooo gonna use "Is that the hill you want to die on?"

My HTC Android phone has the option to send certain numbers straight to voicemail.

DH's iPhone doesn't have that option, but he can create a custom ringtone out of a clip of silence, and assign that ringtone to the numbers he chooses.

We use it for spam (even with the rise of caller ID spoofing, it's surprising how many spam calls come from the same numbers), but you could just as easily set your office's that way. Even better if the automated calls come from a different number than the "live" calls do, but either way you would have voicemail you could check when you wake up.



Still ... there was just something in my local paper this morning about someone who got fired because she vented to her boyfriend about her working conditions, and the boyfriend took it upon himself to disrupt the workplace in response ...

Well, he's calling on our land line, which does not currently have an answering machine. We're looking at that as an option.

He does have control over the list and had chosen to have everyone on it "for emergencies." It's never been used for an emergency, only for these weekly calls about attendance.

For me it's as much about his attitude toward the whole thing. He thinks it's kind of funny that he wakes me up. And he can't see the parallel between his fury over the possibility of a 1 AM call disturbing his family and my annoyance at weekly 7:15 PM calls.

I guess I should count myself lucky that this is the biggest thing I have to worry about right now. :D

Veronica

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Originally Posted by OakLeaf

Still ... there was just something in my local paper this morning about someone who got fired because she vented to her boyfriend about her working conditions, and the boyfriend took it upon himself to disrupt the workplace in response ...

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I'm not really worried about that. My student test scores are consistently the highest at my grade level and that's all that matters to management now. :p

Maybe I should use that to persuade him to take me off the list, "Sorry, I only have brain cells to have the students read silently or watch videos since I didn't get enough sleep last night." :rolleyes:

Veronica

Good suggestions on the stress reduction if you can't change the situation, which may unfortunately be the case. I am not technically advanced enough to know how to set my phone up to turn off calls etc, but maybe that would also work.

I'm also a teacher and our district prides itself on a lot of technology use. They usually issued email bulletins in these situations, rather than phone calls. Fortunately, my principal and our school technology coordinator are both much more reasonable and this problem just wouldn't arise- but I am very sympathetic.

I could never keep your schedule in a million years. It is just a guess, but I think that for most people, including other teachers, parents, etc, it would seem extreme to go to bed that early in the evening, and the resistance may be partly that they can't even imagine that 7:15 is an unreasonable time to call. So they may not think it is worth it accommodate you. However, if your district is like mine, parents' voices may be listened to when yours is not, so if you could get some parents to complain, maybe that would help....


I have also heard that expression "is this the hill you want to die on?" as well as this one: "Choose your battles".

Hope you are able to resolve this! Teaching is increasingly demanding as it is- none of us need any unnecessary stress added to the job.

Sharon

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Originally Posted by Veronica

Well, he's calling on our land line, which does not currently have an answering machine. We're looking at that as an option.

He does have control over the list and had chosen to have everyone on it "for emergencies." It's never been used for an emergency, only for these weekly calls about attendance.

For me it's as much about his attitude toward the whole thing. He thinks it's kind of funny that he wakes me up. And he can't see the parallel between his fury over the possibility of a 1 AM call disturbing his family and my annoyance at weekly 7:15 PM calls.

I guess I should count myself lucky that this is the biggest thing I have to worry about right now. :D

Veronica

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Why can't there system support 2 calling lists? A "For Emergencies" for general distribution, and a "Routine Parental Update" that only goes to those who really need to know. It's not like you have a need-to-know about being reminded about early dismissal if you don't have a child in the school who needs to be picked up.

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Originally Posted by 7rider

Why can't there system support 2 calling lists? A "For Emergencies" for general distribution, and a "Routine Parental Update" that only goes to those who really need to know. It's not like you have a need-to-know about being reminded about early dismissal if you don't have a child in the school who needs to be picked up.

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Because that would be "tedious" to set up. :D

This thread is doing exactly what I hoped... giving me some good ideas and putting the whole thing into perspective.

Veronica

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Originally Posted by 7rider

Why can't there system support 2 calling lists? A "For Emergencies" for general distribution, and a "Routine Parental Update" that only goes to those who really need to know. It's not like you have a need-to-know about being reminded about early dismissal if you don't have a child in the school who needs to be picked up.

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BTW...I know it's "their" system....I just can't type when I word it 8 different ways before I hit "submit". Sorry, teach! ;)

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Originally Posted by Veronica

Well, he's calling on our land line

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Does anyone else call your landline? Maybe you could just turn the ringer off permanently.

We have a spare line left over from the days of dialup internet that we kept for a number of reasons, but one of the big ones is having a number we can give out to businesses we don't want calling. There's an answering machine attached just in case (and that also lets us use that phone line to check whether the electric is on when we're not home). Anyone whose calls we would answer, we give them the cell numbers.

New phones and an answering machine are on their way. Gotta love Amazon Prime. :D Wish I didn't have to spend money to solve the issue, but my sleep and "fortress of solitude" are worth it.

Veronica

From the do not call list at www.donotcall.gov

HOW TO FILE A COMPLAINT

You may file a complaint if you received an unwanted call after your number was on the National Registry for 31 days.


You may also file a complaint if you received a call that used a recorded message instead of a live person (whether or not your number was on the Registry).

*Reminder:Even if your number is registered, companies with which you do business may also continue to call, unless you have asked them to stop calling you. If you have asked them to stop calling, please keep a record of the date you made the request and include that information in the comment section of any complaint you submit against that company.

charities and political organizations are exempt from this list.

Love my calller ID though.

https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-v.../phonescam.jpg

This is getting afield ... but I've filed DNCL violation complaints before. It's useful for eventual prosecution and we should all do it, but we should be clear about why we're doing it, too. It's not going to stop the calls any time soon.

Veronica, it sounds like you have a resolution. One other possibility would be to tell the school you have a new number, give them your cell phone number, and then set the ringer to silent for calls from that number.

(The automated call rules are likely not going to apply to calls from your employer as they are non-commercial calls).

I just got an automated message from the school system, 9:30pm. Granted, I suppose it's an "emergency" message (schools are closed tomorrow) but A) no s***, they're calling for a foot of snow! and B) I'm a VERY part-time employee and don't report back until January 5th anyway.

But at least I'm still awake, though 9:30 is later than I'd call anyone but my mom or the bf.