Knowing your neighbours

Well do you?

We don't know neighbour's names at all..those that live on same floor as us. We live in a highrise condo building. We do know the permanent security desk staff and they know us by name. It's always been important to know for emergencies, etc. It's been helpful in the past.

For some people, this type of distance/anonymity it is very bothersome. But for myself, as long as neighbours are quiet, respect the common property areas, it's not a problem.

I just came back from an annual barbecue that our building community organizes. It was pleasant.

In the previous building, I've knew 1-2 other neighbours living on different floors. In last building where I lived, I got to know a couple in their late 60's..who cycled. I met her in the bike storage rm. and we would greet each other as cyclists.

My partner doesn't care much either to know others in building. We both have friends elsewhere in the city with whom we each share more of ourselves and do stuff with them as a couple/individually.

I know most of my neighbors. We've been in our neighborhood for about 13 years and there are kids I've watched grow up, adults I've watched grow old (and a couple have died), pets I've helped chase down, and so on. My daughter and the little girl who lives next door have in and out privileges at each others' houses. I'm as likely to see the neighbor kid in my front room when I come out in the morning as I am my own child. Her dog and ours even have play dates.

It's a great neighborhood. It's also only four miles from my favorite ride path. The one big drawback is that it's a 40-minute drive to work in the morning and about fifteen minutes to the nearest Trader Joe's, although the Vons across the street is getting a great collection of organic products.

The only neighbors I don't know by name are the 20-somethings that live across the street, although one of them is frequently out front riding his trick bike. We've nodded once or twice as he acknowledged the old woman loading and unloading her MTB in the Rav. There are four or five young people living there and other than an infrequent loud party, they keep to themselves.

Roxy

I've lived in my house for one year. It's a very modest house in a very modest neighborhood. I know all of the neighbors on my block, and quite a few others by site if not name in the neighborhood. I'm not a very gregarious person, but having a dog and walking through the neighborhood twice a day as we do makes us a familiar sight. I've also been named the president of our civic association, so I kinda have to get out and meet people. I see it as an opportunity to overcome my natural shyness while hopefully helping improve the neighborhood in a few key ways (cleaning up trash, reducing crime, addressing illegal pit bull breeding, and getting a garden club going come to mind).

When I lived in Paris, however, I was quite content to NOT know the other people in my apartment building. Since we lived in such close quarters, it was best to not know each other very well. That's pretty common, at least in my experience in apartments.

My building (30 floors) is very friendly. I know nearly everybody at least to say hello. We have lots of dogs and children in the building, so casual introductions happen easily. We also have a friendly staff.

When we have a large party, we always invite 6-8 people or couples from the building, and all the neighbors on our floor (that's just three people).

We are very close to the World Trade Center site, and going through 9/11 together helped some people to get to know each other. I already knew everybody before that because of my dog.

We recently had a neighbor who was slipping into dementia and had no family. Quite a few people came together to help her, and to help with her cat. I was offered more money that I needed for vet bills.

Tulip, good luck with tackling dog breeding. That could be a tough one.

Pam

The people who I met today, are like us, they enjoy living in our area since we live within walking distance to many services and different activity areas.

Dearie and I had discussed jokingly, what if we started up a cycling group..especially when we live near several major bike routes. But in all honesty, neither he nor I want to conform to a specific group meeting time for regular cycling all the time.

We each already do alot of regular cycling since it is integrated into our lifestyle and primary transportation mode, hence, we don't need to add on more group cycling time on a regular basis.

Ah, one of my favorite subjects. I have always felt as if I lived on a different planet than my neighbors, though, I do know them...
First house, well it was a new development out in the boonies (back then) of Chandler, AZ. We knew everyone and socialized on the street, but not really outside of evening walks, a couple of BBQs. Second house, in Tempe, more upscale neighborhood. We became friends with our neighbors across the street (we were both pg) and still are in contact with them. But, mostly SAHMs and I was working. We were friends with next door neighbors (mildly) until they got religion and never overlooked an opportunity to try to convert the heathen Jews. When we moved here, our first house was on a busy country road. I knew my neighbors on 3 sides, but didn't socialize. We hated living in that town. Then, we moved to a typical development in a place we really wanted to live in. My kids were in middle school and I was working. The other families were mostly young kids and lots of highly educated SAHMs. They thought I was the devil incarnate for making my kids stand out in the rain and snow, to wait for the bus. I called them Stepford wives. But, I knew them and they were good neighbors. We did not socialize and the neighborhood BBQ made me very angry every year... can't explain it.
We moved here 3, almost 4 years ago. It's a unique neighborhood of contemporary homes, with a neighborhood association, a pond and tennis. It was built in the 60s by a group of professors at MIT. Some of the original owners still live here. They are very old, in their 80s. We share our driveway with another house, a couple about 8 to 10 years older than us. They married young and have a daughter in her 40s. Both are working and we have a lot in common with them. We do socialize and have even been to their summer home at the Cape a couple of times. The other people are well, unique in their own ways. A lot of artists, David Sibley, the nationally known bird expert, lawyers, professors, etc. We go to the yearly progressive dinner and say hi at the pond, but Concord people are not that friendly to newcomers. Since I moved from a town in the area and have lots of friends in the area, I don't care... I really feel since my kids didn't go to school here, I will never have a connection to the community like I did before.
A funny story. Last night we went out to dinner at a new restaurant, about 3 miles from our house, but in the next town, where our kids went to school. The hostess, an older teen, seats us and says, "Where are you from?" We say Concord, but I pipe in and say, "But we used to live in Boxborough and our kids graduated from AB." She laughed and asked when our kids graduated, but said she was "just an infant then," since she just graduated. She said, well, that information made up for our "Concordness."
Only in New England.

I always used to live in places where people don't know their neighbors.
20 years ago i moved back to the little town where I went to high school for 3 years eons ago.
Because it's a village with lots of walkable sidewalks and streets, and a 'real' Main Street, I have gotten to know MANY people in my neighborhood. Not all of them are people I have much in common with, but I like knowing them anyway.
I feel very lucky to live in such a village. Of course I do make part of that happen, because I make a point of often going up to strangers and talking with them, like if someone is out in their front yard gardening, or needs helps carrying something, or their child is wearing something interesting, etc. I have met SO many wonderful people that way, I make it a habit to get to know strangers even if only for a moment for a friendly hello. It works, and it's happily addictive. :)

I live on a 1 block dead end. I know most of my neighbors. Some of them don't speak english, but we all smile and say hi. When my 78 year old neighbor "disappeared" without her car leaving her garage, the entire block tried to find out what happened. (A friend of hers picked her up and took her out to dinner)

I moved to my neighborhood 17 years ago, and now, except for the elderly couple on the corner who don't speak to anyone, I'm the old-timer of the neighborhood. I know all my neighbors, many of them to the point that I have their spare house keys. We don't have dinner or go out, but I can borrow sugar or a beer if I'm dying for one, and I'll watch their pets or I can call them to let my dogs out if I'm going to be late.

When I moved in, there were several elderly couples on the block. I'd watch out for them as they got more frail, and help them out around the house and yard if necessary. Sadly, they've died now and the block has a much different feel with lots of families with young children moving in.

The house next to me always seemed cursed, since it was either vacant or had awful renters for all the years I've lived there, until last year, when a nice young couple bought it and turned it into a home that someone loves, finally. It's amazing the difference that has made.

I've also met many people on the surrounding blocks on my dog walks, but we mostly know each other by our dogs, not by our names.

It might be the small-town Nebraskan in me, but I can't imagine living in a neighborhood that isn't friendly. Although I do have to say that I probably know more of my neighbors than anyone else does. Maybe that just means I'm a nosy busybody, but I don't think so.:p

I grew up in suburbia and knew neighbors by sight. I moved across the country to a great little subdivision, but alas, I still didn't know my neighbors. I moved again (to the middle of the country), and bought a cool log cabin up in the mtns. I loved it. I knew some neighbors, but not well enough to hang out with them. I loved the view and the locale, but felt like something was missing in terms of community. I live in a fairly small university town now. I moved to the 'old town' part of town. I don't know if it's like mindedness (it's the liberal, hippy part of town), but I know all my neighbors and I have only lived there a few months. We hang out on the porch and wave to the people walking and riding their bikes by our house. I go to the grocery store, and it's an odd day if I don't see someone I know. Maybe I was just meant to be a small town type, but I love the community of knowing my neighbors and it feels safer if you know whose faces are 'supposed' to be in the neighborhood. I do wish it was more diverse here, but I think that's just the area (Wyoming is not really known for diversity). Though, through my connections at the university, there is more diversity in my world than in most people's here in town.

Yes, we do. Pretty well, in fact. But, we live in the country where knowing your neighbors is more a part of life than it is in more urban surroundings.

We have a couple that lives next door that are probably 10 years older than us. We are quite friendly with them and often exchange produce and favors.

The guy who owns the land surround us and our neighbors is really nice. We've met him twice - he operates a bison ranch and lives up the road a ways.

The couple who own the berry farm across the street are probably about our age and we've only exchanged pleasantries with them occasionally. We don't even know their names. They have 4 young boys and since we don't have kids, there isn't a lot of opportunities for socializing.

When we lived in NC we lived in a suburban neighborhood and we barely knew two sets of neighbors even though we were surround by TONS of them.

Same thing when we lived in suburban Florida.

I live in a condo area where you are either retired or a horse person. I know many of my neighbors, the majority of which also have dogs. It is a great way to meet people I have found! It is a very friendly and quiet community with very few children. I love it there.

In my last apartment, one of my neighbors decided we were best friends, would show up at all hours uninvited. I really couldn't stand her, and the efforts dbf and I made at avoiding her were comical (like slipping out the back door while she was knocking on the front). This probably sounds mean, but she was always drunk, and I didn't want her constant melodrama in my life. She was a factor in my decision to move. I've been leery of getting too close to any neighbor since her.

Although we don't really socialize with our neighbors we do know them, say "hello" when we see them and do sometimes chat with the neighbors on either side of us. It probably helps that there are no fences in our hood. The couple we have known the longest - we let each other know when the other household is going to be gone and who to expect will be over watching the place/pets, when we'll back... and we each other's phone nos. It makes us feel much more secure knowing that even if we're gone, there is a nosy set of eyes looking at our place.

Just this morning, had a strange thing happened.

I was making arrangements for teleconference meeting next week with another person in another province.. 3,000 kms. away. Other person noticed our address. She has only visited Vancouver once

And it was with her friend who lives 7 stories below ours. :eek: The possibility of such coincidences when there are alot of high rises in Vancouver, is just incredible.

Just yesterday, I met a neighbour of her Vancouver friend ..who lives on that same floor of our building too. :eek:

You know, this sort of strange coincidental stuff involving other people or my real friends from far away..happens quite frequently to me. :rolleyes:

We've been in our house for 22 years so we've seen some neighbors come and go over all that time.

Our neighbors 2 doors down have been there over 25 years and our children pretty much grew up together. We've been through family deaths and illnesses together, graduations, weddings, too many cookouts and parties to remember, and a few vacations together.

We have relatively new neighbors on either side of us now. We have great relationships with both of them as well. When we moved into our house we were the new young parents on the street - now we're the old timers compared to most. Our neighborhood has been going through another transition the past few years and it's nice to see young families moving back in again. I like to hear all the activity through the open windows on a summer night.