I rode alone

I have to confess, I am the biggest scaredy cat in the world. I never ride alone. Well, Ben is gone to Denver for the week and I was feeling really, really sorry for myself that he missed my 40th birthday and our son, who is home from military school only said, "oh yeah, happy birthday" after Ben reminded him....and....sniff, sniff...I just hit emotional rock bottom.

So Sunday, I thought, I am going to ride just a little ways, not far. Just around the triangle (our road makes a triangle). I even thought, I am not going to put on bike shorts but just wear jeans. Well, that didn't work cause I couldn't find the little straps that keep my jeans free of the chain, so garb up I did. I rode all of 4 miles. Big deal, right?

Then yesterday, I was just depressed beyond words. I am sick and tired of being afraid of everything in life. So, I thought, "By gosh, I am going to ride my bike and if I have a flat I'll change it myself and if a car hits me, big deal!" I ended up riding 20 miles. I averaged 11.9 mph. Not a single car even drove down the access road of the interstate. I did have a darling of a teeny tiny dachshund chase me. But I am soooooo proud of myself! I was able to do it all by myself. It felt so good. This means that if I want to ride when Ben isn't here, either morning or midday, or whenever, I can just go do it. I don't have to wait for him. I don't have ride hard and keep up a 15 mph average, either!

I know a lot of you ride alone all the time. I didn't realize how nice it is to do that. I still want to ride mostly with Ben, but I enjoyed my alone time, too.

I have been under an incredible amount of stress lately, and have found myself polishing off a bottle of wine each evening, until Ben said, "no more" we are both getting healthy!

I found this book at Walmart this evening, "Body For Life For Women" and bought it. I used to do the Body For Life thing, and I have wanted to to finish the challenge for about six years now. So I am going to do that. I really need something to help my self confidence. And I really, really want to get super fit, muscular and acheive my life long goal of biking a century and even do a triathlon or biathlon.

Ben will be home Thursday and then on Friday I have to go to my yearly cancer checkup (EGD and colonoscopy; last year they removed four encapsulated polyps that were stage A contained, so I'm not overly worried about that...it is just a crappy thing to go through...PUN somewhat intended!)

As I tell my son, "pull yourself up by bootstraps and get on with it". I need practice what I preach. And I do thank God for Ben, who finally saw how desperately depressed I am/was and is willing to help me before I become a begging wino on the street corner.

And I am really, really grateful for the bike....and this forum! What a nice place to come, and learn. Why just yesterday I was reading a post about biking shorts, and I think it was Denise who mentioned PI Sugar Shorts so I ordered some from Team Estrogen, along with a cut sleeveless Peggy Sue jersy. Then I read about the Speedplay Frogs and am interested in them. HEY! Cycling AND shopping beat Prozac and Merlot any day in my book!

KiK (BTW, I am morphing, Kim is my wimpy name I am now Kik!)

Congrats on enjoying your first solo bike ride; I hope it is the first of many to come. It's great that you have Ben as a riding partner (and more!), but it's still good to know that you can head out on your bike whenever the desire hits.

And good luck with your checkup on Friday. Be sure to keep us posted.
--- Denise

Good for you--it sounds like overcoming the mental block of fear was important for you. Feeling competent--to change tires, make basic repairs--is a start, and then just tuning into the joy in riding (for me, utterly being in the moment is one of the things I love about riding) is so wonderful!

Bravo for you! Isn't it a wonderful exuberant feeling of power? Grab those bars and go!

Im going next week to take a bike repair clinic at one of the local shops - maybe someone near you has one of those!I wouldnt know WHAT to do with a flat right now - except to pick up the cell phone - do you think roadside assistance would come out for that? :p

Doesn't it feel wonderful to just get on the bike and GO????

Going on a group ride really helped my confidence level in traffic too - 2 days after the first group ride I ever did, I was out riding major roads in the middle of the day - probably not the smartest thing but I came home feeling as though I had conquered something!

And retail therapy...well thats the best and ain't TE a grand place to shop??? New cycling gear and clothes beats anything else anyway! You can NEVER have too much of any of it!

<HIGH FIVE!>

WOW! Be proud of yourself! Instead of laying around, and eating your way through your depression... you got out and rode!

I read recently, that studies have shown that people who exercise are less likely to be depressed.

I personally do not ride alone on city streets... because I live near nothing buy major roads, and I figured safety in numbers. So, I have some groups that I ride with.

But, if I need/want to ride alone... and not on busy streets... I just go to the lake and ride around it... 25 miles.

I do have to say that riding with someone else is 100 times more fun... but it sure is liberating to know that you can do it on your own as well. Which is scary to do, when you are use to always riding with someone!

PS- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! It sounds like you are being healthy, and taking care of your body... good for you!

I'm glad for you Kik! Don't wait for Ben, for cycling or for other great aspects of life (besides maybe drinking - which is better and more healthy when sharing). But do take him on rides once in a while. ;) Riding together is fun, riding with a large group is great, but riding alone has its charms... And in many situations I find it more safe, as it seems to me that I pay more attention to the road when I'm not chitchatting with someone....

Enjoy!!!!

Flat repair is easier now than when my Dad showed me how back when we were dodging dinosaur droppings on the roads.

Not having my Dad on hand, however, I suggest you click on the yellow TE logo at the top of the page, -> community -> how-to guides. Print them out, go out into the back yard and practice. It's best if nobody is at home when you do this, they'll try to "help." (As though that will help later.)

Go for it, girl, what's the worst that can happen?

Thanks gals, so much, from the bottom of my heart!

As for flats, the problem for me is that I can't get them repressured up again much past 60psi and I ride at 110 psi. The tire says inflate to a minimum of 87 psi. I am thinking the weight lifting will help me get the upper body strength I need.

I think it is a good idea to practice flat changing here at home. Sounds like a fun project...NOT! :eek:

Hey, Kik! How about a C02 inflater? you want to save that buff upper body for bike handling....let the gadgets do the work for you! :rolleyes:

and CONGRATULATIONS!! you done good, girl! Thank you for sharing your experience with all of us. Made me smile out loud, my dear!

Namaste,
~T~

Thanks. Ya know, I've thought about the CO2 inflater. I've wondered how well they work. I'm itching for a new cycling gadget. It sounds like a good excuse to go to our LBS (50 miles away) and check out new bikes, too! :D

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Originally Posted by MomOnBike

I suggest you click on the yellow TE logo at the top of the page, -> community -> how-to guides. Print them out, go out into the back yard and practice. It's best if nobody is at home when you do this, they'll try to "help." (As though that will help later.)

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You know, as much as I've come to these forums I didn't know TE had the how to guides. I just clicked over there and was like "Wow"! I'm such a nerd! :p

Kik you did it!!! That is great!!
I am one of those that rides alone and find lots of things about myself during that ME time, building my confidence and body at the same time.
Once you change a tire in a relaxed enviroment(home) BEFORE getting a flat on the road and knowing how, will make you feel that much more self reliable and less scaredy cattish.....independence day of your own....
liberating even :D

Funny when us kids were ready to get drivers license, my dad showed us how to change a tire on the car and then in order for him to sign, we had to show him that we could change it ourselves after his example. My husband did the same kind of thing, showed me first then had me do it so that if my phone died or any other matter came up I would know how to do it. I have had to change one on my own since, but luckily it was here at home before a ride I always check/inflate and my last ride I had got a piece of glass that deflated it and had to change it right there.
I advise that you learn the back tire so that you have to also monkey with taking it from the chain and will know how to place it back on chain and frame.

For those single ladies out there, I am sure you could ask your LBS or another cycling buddy to show you how if you don't know already. Your tire advocate- AutumnBreez

:cool: You can do it! (from the movie- The Waterboy)

and welcome to the world of solo-riding! your LBS is 50 miles away??...sounds like a Perfect excuse for a bike ride to me. Maybe ride there and have Ben come pick you up or vicie versie?? I have the opposite problem of most women, I do Everything alone so the first time I rode in a pack I was very nervous, afraid I would bring someone down or forget to signal something back. Tomorrow will be my first club ride and I'm a tad nervous about that too. I've been working really hard on holding my line(something you don't have to worry about when riding alone!). I was all set to try my first century self-supported last Sat until the winds defeated me.....but there will be other Sats and it will happen when it's right, kinda like your first solo ride! I'm so proud of you and all that you have worked so hard to accomplish in your life, your solo ride is the icing on your cake!!

Another great idea is to get into an "introduction to bike mechanics" class (I think someone else suggested this). I'm into the middle of one right now: last night and tonight, total of 7 hours. Dismounting and remounting both the front and back wheel, fixing a flat, adjusting the brakes, maintaining the chain and derailleur. Basic stuff, enough to be pretty autonomous on the road... And fun too! Also, you realize that not all guys know how to do these things (because obviously a couple of them are there too).

Plus, in Montreal, the pro-mechanics is a woman, Denise Belzile. How inspiring...

Enjoy!

Good for you Kk!!! I have felt the same way since my divorce. It was so thrilling when I finally went out on a ride alone and did my "own" ride and was not trying to keep up with someone else. It is a metaphor for life, ride your own ride, be happy with who you are and where you are going. Good for you.

Tracey

Awesome Kk!
And I know the feeling of exhilaration! For the first time last weekend I rode by myself too! Usually I ride with my boyfriend Tony who is then always available to fix flats. I was only going to do about 20 miles, but I ended up riding 41 miles alone!!! It was an incredible feeling, and Tony was really impressed too. Also, it is proven that exercise helps people cope with depression. Which is precisely why I choose to do something active each and every day - there is no better feeling than when you just finish a tough workout!
Great Job!

Congratulations, Kik - it's a leap of faith every time you go out the door by yourself but nothing beats the feeling you have when you roll back into your driveway, mission accomplished!

That's great. Glad you got out there and did it. Sometimes it's hard when you're afraid, but you're right, if you want to change things, you just have to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and do it. :)

big congrats kik! sometimes riding by yourself is a great way to burn off some frustration and get out-- like cruising but healthier, lol.

Just wanted to chime in on the inflating tires topic-- I bought my road bike used, and with it came a cute little frame pump... which didn't get me past 30 psi!! I'm also supposed to ride @ 100/110psi. I invested in the Topeak Road Morph-- it's like a frame pump that turns into a mini floor pump. I can get my tires up to 110 in nothing flat! It's definitely heavier than CO2 of course... but I don't mind. I've read reviews that say the gauge can be innacurate.. but I haven't had any problems so far.

Cheers :)

Kik- first of all HAPPY B-DAY!

You've gotten past the biggest hurdle! Really!!! The more your ride alone, the more comfortable you will become with it... the more you ride with traffic, the more used to it you become... which is not to say you take it for granted, but rather you learn how to ride safely with traffic around you...

Absolutely get CO2!!! The tool is cheap, and the refill cannisters are really cheap at WALMART! Like $.99 each... I carry BOTH... A CO2 and a pump... CO2 for ease but a handheld pump in case the CO2 fails or (and yes this has happened..sigh) I have more than 1 flat on the ride. Absolutely go in the garage/backyard or wherever and flat your tire, take it apart, put it back together... practicing in the comfort of your home sure makes it easier when it happens for real...

one more thing... I always put my tubes in a ziploc with some baby powder! Shake it all up (just a little powder to coat the tube) and then when you DO flat, the tube is MUCH easier to slide in as the rubber is coated and doesn't stick to the tire as you try to insert it!!!!!

way to go on tackling your demon... fear! that's a huge hurdle and YOU DID IT! :D

Hi Kk- Here's my opinion for what its worth- Some people love the cylinders, I am one of those who has had trouble with them so I stick to the old reliable bike pump. :D :D

However, I'm not strong enough either to get 87 lbs of air into my tires, so I bought a Topeak Road Morph bike pump. It fits on my frame, and when needed turns into a floor pump! It even has a gauge so I can at least get some idea of what pressure I have in my tire. Instead of pumping sideways, you pump like you would ordinarily- pushing downwards which gives you more strength.

The guys I ride with often use it when their pumps either don't work, or they get tired of pumping their way! :p :p

You can find these online for road bikes or mountain bikes if you want to see a picture.

One more two cents worth- always carry some kind of identification with you when you are out by yourself (an old driver's license with your address will suffice). A cell phone is also good.

Hope this helps! :D :D

Kiki--Congratulations on all your progress. I must say that I ride to and from work and after particularly stressful days I'll extend the ride home as long as needed to decompress before I get home. Riding alone really allows you to think things through.

AND BY THE WAY:

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Originally Posted by Technotart

Im going next week to take a bike repair clinic at one of the local shops - maybe someone near you has one of those!I wouldnt know WHAT to do with a flat right now - except to pick up the cell phone - do you think roadside assistance would come out for that? :p

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There is bicycle roadside assistance: http://tinyurl.com/9drz5

I thought it was a little pricey and just learned to do basic repairs on my own. But if you think you need it, it could save you a long walk home.

You know, I carry a cell phone, but I don't carry any ID. I know better, I guess it just slipped my mind. I do keep a ten dollar bill in my bag.

I went out again today, had to try out my new biking shorts and jersey (I've got to say this for Team Estrogen, they ship fast and don't gig ya on the cost of shipping). I left at 2:30 and did 26 miles. It is getting too hot in Texas to leave midday, I also had a lovely crosswind to battle, I am just absolutely exhausted right now, but mentally I've never felt better. What a change from Sunday and Monday!

I doubt I'll get to bike tomorrow, as tomorrow is 'clean out the colon day'. Anyone care to join me for a mag citrate soda? :eek: :eek: :eek:


I'll look into the Topeak Road Morph and the cylinders. I think the reason we never tried the cyclinders is because the guys at our LBS, who are avid cyclist, don't really care for them.

I still can't believe how much I love cycling and how much it has helped the depression. It just feels so good to be out there and to be that close to nature, yet whiz along at my own pace. My biking buddy, Ben, will be back tomorrow and he is ready to get back on the bike, too.

Kk- That you love to be close to nature- that's one thing for me too. I love the outdoors and cycling is such a wonderful way to be outside and enjoy nature winds and all! I find that cycling in the early morning is the best regarding winds- I cycle before the sun comes up (on city streets with little or no traffic) and during the spring/summer months enjoy gorgeous sunrises! Hopefully you will too! :D :D

Kik, it's so wonderful to hear another one of us has discovered the delights of cycling! I, too, found it was a great help when I was really low - it made a difference on so many levels. The exercise, the outdoors, the meditation time! Ahhh!!! :)

I've been enjoying this thread and join the rest of my TE Sisters in applauding KiK's venture into that scary (but only for the first time!) world of biking solo.

I have the world's best biking buddy who happens to be my DH :) and I have come to rely on my solo rides to help keep me centered. It's a wonderful and wonder full combination that I know y'all can relate to.

My contribution to this thread is to share that I carry a patch and extra tube; those are resident in each bike bag for each bike as are small ID cards that list our names and two emergency contact numbers. When I ride by myself I carry my cell phone and emergency money of at least $5.00.

DH is always concerned about my being out by myself - it's nice to know that someone is concerned! A couple of years ago I came up with the solution to ease his mind of what if something happens of riding a set route rather than making it up as I went along. This year I have four routes that I ride; I made 8.5X11 color copies of the routes from my handy dandy gazateer with the route highlighted. When I leave the house I put the map of the route I am going to ride on the dining room table (the location of messages to family members) along with a note of when I left the house. With two 'boys' who live in the area and stop in unannounced it helps answer the question of where is Mom. Even tho if something DID happen Al would be the first to know since his work # is on my emergency contact list he still worries about my being out by myself; knowing that I have left the map out for him is peace of mind for him.

I would also like to add that I think it is important, especially for women, to listen to that inner voice. Too many times we ignore that feeling that a situation is not 'right'. Right off the top of my head I can think of one (of two) instances when out biking on a stretch of road that is not heavily populated there were two cars parked on the side of the road - not an unusual circumstance given that the area is a magnet for people out trout fishing. But this time I had a very uncomfortable feeling - when I tried to shake it off telling myself that I was just being paranoid and 'silly' that feeling of being 'frightened' and the need to flee did not go away. I turned my bike around and did not continue. One of the things I love about being out on my bike is that it helps keep me in tune with myself; I'll never know what the outcome would have been had I continued but I've learned to listen to that inner voice ... she's usually right.

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Originally Posted by nuthatch

Kik, it's so wonderful to hear another one of us has discovered the delights of cycling! I, too, found it was a great help when I was really low - it made a difference on so many levels. The exercise, the outdoors, the meditation time! Ahhh!!! :)

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Don't forget one of the rewards of biking ... ice cream. Which is why I have to keep replenishing my 'emergency money' ... we do have awesome ice cream here in Wisconsin :D

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Originally Posted by Biking Chick

This year I have four routes that I ride; I made 8.5X11 color copies of the routes from my handy dandy gazateer with the route highlighted. When I leave the house I put the map of the route I am going to ride on the dining room table (the location of messages to family members) along with a note of when I left the house.

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What a fantastic idea! My husband always asks, "Where will you be?" and I do some hazy arm waving and mention a road name but this would really be helpful for him (and kids). I just knew you'd be this organized, BC!!!

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Originally Posted by nuthatch

What a fantastic idea! My husband always asks, "Where will you be?" and I do some hazy arm waving and mention a road name but this would really be helpful for him (and kids). I just knew you'd be this organized, BC!!!

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Don't you just hate it when you get that deer in the headlights look?? Cuts down on my aggravation - instead of my saying, "I'm going out towards 'B', take a left on Maple ride up to '54' right on 'B' down to Grant, over to West River Drive..." when I know that what dh is hearing is "blah blah blah blah ..."

A picture is worth a thousand words ...

P.S. Thanks for the compliement :D