Ha, CC! What's the distance? Have fun with your training!
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Ha, CC! What's the distance? Have fun with your training!
A sure sign of my neighborhood's ongoing hipsterfication: while standing in line at the neighborhood hip donut shop getting dragged in to a heated discussion of which of the 3 very local microbreweries is best.
(It depends on your taste in beer, of course. Extreme hops? Ale? Lager? Weird flavor combinations?)
I am in a workshop and I cannot wait to get out of here. And, sorry to say, the topic is yoga and mindfulness in therapy. I use this stuff all of the time, but I am going on no sleep! I've had insomnia all related to my job change. Just going through that feel stupid stage. Not around the clients, just learning new procedures with paperwork and technology.
I need to lie down and I have a 50 minute drive home.
I got told on Friday that my services are no longer needed :(
Actually, I'm taking it fairly well. My Mother is getting to the point where she needs daily supervision, and I got my exercise today by walking a lease in the same building she's in down to the P.O. I do have a different apartment.
I'll be moving in a couple of weeks to Memphis and seeing what this Chica can do to earn herself an honest living - I've already joked that I'm going to a be a tour guide at Graceland(Actually, I'd rather do Sun records). Just turning Lemons into Lemonade.
Aw, that stinks, Fredwina.
Best of luck with the move and the job search.
Sorry to hear Fredwina, hope the move drops you into a cool new job.
Best of luck in finding a new job....Graceland could be a happy job. Visited twice and being a tourist area, it should be interesting. People are on vacation so in generally good mood!
Today I went and did an intake assessment on a client at my old school, where I taught. They have a brand new, gorgeous building. I was dazzled!
It was luckily, an early release day for the kids, so I got to talk to all of my former colleagues. They made me feel like a rock star. Seriously, I am on a high now, from so many hugs and kind words.
Won't last too long, I am sure. Back to reality.
Good morning everyone.
Moving ahead slow but sure, the things that stop me in my tracks and make me tear up keep surprising me; always bought mom flowers when I did her grocery shopping, at the store this morning I walked past the bouquets and started crying. My honey went though this four years ago so she just strokes my back and hands me kleenex. I have the best wife in the whole world.
(((Pax))) Yes you do have the best wife in the whole world or maybe there's a tie with Knott.
I can agree with that! :D
Okay PNWers! ChickWhoRips is in town. :cool:
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She even woo'ed the horses. They both came over and laid down with her for a nap out in the back yard. We went to Pike's Place and tried on some hats... I bought the psychedelic one... had some brew at the Pike Brewery and generally had a fantastic visit in the Seattle area with my friend Jean at her ranch. Having a great time with a very wonderful person. :D
What a great time!!!!
Way cool X! Are you living in Seattle now?
I think she's south of us, Oregon still. I would have joined in the fun but had to work. Also busy because of planning for my Mom's memorial :(Quote:
Originally Posted by snapdragen
Oh Trek, I'm so sorry. Hugs to you.
Sorry, Trek.
So sorry Trek, that is hard. Hugs and warm thoughts to you.
So sorry Trek. Hugs
Thanks. I miss her so much. Mom was 91 years old, she was dressed and ready to go raise holy heck at a meeting with her progressive activist friends when she suddenly passed. When her friend arrived and Mom did not respond to the door, her friend called my brother who lives nearby. Since she had a heart aneurism it was instant. The day after, Knott and I jetted down to see my brother and SIL. The house was all in order and Mom had plants she'd got at the farm market and ready to go into the garden; mostly basil starts. I guess we all should be so lucky, active, independent and gardening right to the end.
Wow, your mom sounds like such a cool lady. And you're right, we should all be so lucky; my mom was one of those who got sicker and sicker and ended up having a miserable last few years.Quote:
Originally Posted by Trek420
I wanna go out like your mom.
Me too. We don't always get those choices. She was diagnosed with the aortic aneurism years back. The doc advised surgery. This would have her in rehab for a year. Close to 90 at the time she decided to just keep going, always with the specter that she could go at any moment rather than a year or more in rehab with no certainty that she'd be independent after. I think I'd choose the same.
I'll never be as sharp as her, my Mom was brilliant. But if you want to live like her start gardening, doing The Nation crossword puzzles to keep the body and brain sharp. Find causes you're passionate about and raise heck with your lefty friends. Maybe a demonstration every so often.
Other than that luck and genes I guess.
Trek, your mom sounds like a wonderful, intelligent woman who embraced life to the fullest. I hope to be just like her when I'm "old". And like others have said, we should all be so lucky to go quickly like that without years of misery and poor health as so many are faced with, or dying in the hospital.
Still, condolences are in order. I don't care how old she was or how she died, it HURTS to lose a parent. Hugs and warm thoughts coming your way...
Amen sister, the first dozen people who told me "your mom lived a long life" almost got whacked. Who are they to say how long a life should be, she wanted to stick around, she was not done yet. Those sorts of sentiments are diminishing.Quote:
Originally Posted by emily_in_nc
Trek, your mom does sound wonderful. You have all my sympathy for losing her. Mine went in 2006 and I miss both of my parents every day.
Had to meet my brother this evening at my moms place, theres a guy coming tomorrow to look over her belongings and make an offer to buy the lot. When I got there her stuff was laid out all over the place so it could be more easily viewed... that was so hard, I could look at a coffee mug and know I'd bought it for her for Mother's Day 10 years ago, a book we picked out at the local library book sale, and on and on. It was so hard.
I just want to leave for Florida and find a reset button some how, a break, a chance to heal and catch my breath.
I can't even imagine that, Pax. I know someday that same time will come for me. Since I'm the oldest and the only daughter, I'll be the one in charge of "the sale". My younger brother is awesome, but he's not exactly Mr. Responsible. I dread it sooooo much. My mom was an only child, so she has so many things of my grandparents and even great-grandparents...and I can't begin to keep it all or even more than a tiny % of it. It is going to be SO hard, so emotional. Thinking of you as you go through this horrible rite of adulthood... :(Quote:
Originally Posted by Pax
Thanks, Emily. It is such a strange place to be, to me mom is still alive in my head. A life seems to come done to "stuff"; stuff means little to me, I don't want her silver place settings, I want the fun pic of her goofing off at the beach or the pic of her smooching dad while he's messing around wearing a friends bikini after they've all had a little too much. Stuff means nothing, the memories are everything.
Well, I was kind of the opposite. My mom died young (67), in a family where everyone lives to their 90s. I enjoyed picking out "stuff" to keep, and I love using it, too. In fact, the night after her funeral, my brother and I sat down with her jewelry box and laid it all out and divided it up. I really wanted certain pieces, because I knew he would probably end up selling it, but we were very even handed about it. We sat on my bedroom floor and laughed a lot. I wear her stuff all of the time. She gave me a lot of her big silver pieces and other things for the house many years ago, in the 80s. She wanted to see me using them, and she did. I am so glad when I take that stuff out on holidays, as it reminds me of happy childhood times. My dad sent me a huge box of some of her clothes, which I wore for years after. Of course, she was so petite, that a lot didn't fit me.
She would not want me (or anyone) to be sad. I have good memories and I leave it at that.
I can certainly see it both ways, Pax and Crankin. My practical side says "sell it all" because I am trying to live a very low-clutter existence and agree that stuff is just stuff and really shouldn't matter. But my sentimental side will certainly kick in when the time comes, and I am sure I will want more of the "stuff" of our family's history because of the memories attached to it. Also, some of it is truly beautiful - antiques and such, and some nice jewelry. Harder will be all the kitchen things I don't really need but love. Mexican glassware, delicate crystal...it's going to be hard. Fortunately, my mom wears a much larger size than me, so clothes will not be tempting. But it's not going to be easy, and I dread it so. My mom is 79 and in great health for her age, but no one lives forever.
My oldest brother died this week. I didn't know him very well. We were half siblings, and he was 20 years older than me. He had leukemia. He was a Vietnam Veteran, a career Marine, with all the baggage that goes with that.
My earliest memory of him is meeting him for the first time when I was a toddler and he was home on leave. I remember craning my neck all the way back to see him because he was so tall. He and I hit it off right away. He was handsome, charming and funny. He was a good brother to me. Just too many years between us, and too many miles.
He asked me if I would donate bone marrow, and I would have, but never received the kit from the hospital. I don't know if they just didn't bother testing me because we weren't full siblings, but I would have done it for him. In the end, it was a moot point since he ended up having other health issues that made him ineligible for transplant.
In his honor I will be donating blood regularly. I wish I could have helped him.
(((((Red))))) I'm so sorry.
{{{{{Red}}}} So sorry to read this and your first memory of him is so sweet! Sending warm thoughts and prayers to you and your family.
(((red)))
I'm sorry for the loss of your brother, red.
I am sorry, Red. I am 11 years older than my brother, and while it's not that great of a difference, you do have to work at a relationship. We haven't lived in the same city, except for 3 years, since 1971. And during those 3 years he was in 6th, 8th and 9th grade and I was a young teacher, going to grad school at night, dating. But, to keep on the same theme, I've been talking to him a lot lately, as my dad is not doing well. My brother is the "saint" in the family, mostly by virtue of location. My dad lives with him, which while a recent development, maybe a year ago, he's been responsible for him for a long time. My brother never married, and never reached his potential for all sorts of reasons. Anyway, 2 weeks ago, my brother came home from work and my dad said he didn't feel well. They went to the hospital, saw something on his brain, and did an MRI the next day, given the fact he's 89 and has been smoking since age 16, I am assuming there was stuff in his lungs. They went to do a scope of his lungs, he began seizing, and it was off to the ICU. He was on a ventilator, we signed the DNR, when 1.5 days later, he woke up, screaming for a TV to see the "f*n Red Sox game." Oy. They shipped off to a sub acute rehab and he's much better, working on gaining mobility to walk with a cane. He will not be going home and after his rehab, will be going to assisted living. The oncologist says he has 6 months to a year to live and they are not going to do anything interventional at this point. Most likely lung cancer that went to his brain.
My dad was working until up to about 18 months ago, has an active social life, and still makes it clear that I am the "kid." We have plans to see him in August, already, but I am debating whether to go out there for a few days at the end of this month. He told me not to come and that I didn't need to call him every day! He didn't say this in a mean way, but, this is how our relationship is. My brother and I agree about everything, how this will proceed, so I shall see.
I am very good at compartmentalizing things and this is not the same as when my mom was sick. She was only 67. My dad has lived a long life, and while it didn't turn out as he thought it would, it's been good.
Oh Crankin, I'm sorry. Hugs to you too, and warm thoughts to all your family.
{{{{Crankin}}}} Hugs and prayers for you and all of your family.
My deepest sympathies to the loss of your brother.
And Crankin, hugs to you too.
Thanks. After the initial shock of it, I think my dad is doing ok with what is happening. He's been a denier all of his life, and he can't deny this. My younger son and his wife went to see him Sunday, which was good. They used to live in San Diego, not too far from him, but now they live near LA, so my son just doesn't see him that often anymore.
Frankly, I am more worried that I will never see my brother again, once my dad is gone. We actually have a lot in common, despite the age difference and the fact that his life was vastly different than mine, and he did not get the better side of things. Nothing horrible, but my family's financial circumstances changed greatly while he was growing up. I ignored all of it, since I was already on my own, but it did affect him.