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I've met quite a few TE'rs and I must say they all ended up being like I thought they would be. I find it pretty easy to read personalities through people's writing. Sometimes, I get a feeling about a person and then something they wrote confirms it. This may be my "clinical" sense, which is hard to turn off when I'm not at work.
I've been fortunate enough to meet 5-6 TE members and, like Crankin, they all were like what I thought they would be. The active members of this forum tend to be very active, so our personalities can't help but to come through in our posts in one way or another. We do miss that added dimension of immediate interaction, but enough shines through to give an idea of personality.
I am really stressed right now. My boss called me "testy" yesterday, and he is right - I need to stop that. My apartment is reaching the edge of organized chaos and threatens to cross over into just plain chaos. Piles of boxes are building in preparation for me to start packing next weekend (I move at the end of Sept.) Due to certain...constraints because of my upcoming move and needing to save for an expensive trip home to see my mom I am "stuck" at home when I am not at work or gym. Too much time playing Candy Crush on FB and reading science fiction :o I am far more an introvert than extrovert - so the very fact that staying at home becomes stressful points to my stress level. Possibly depressed - the only place I feel like myself is when I am doing my crazy workouts at the gym and when riding my bike (more rare than I would like). I feel very isolated, but I know all of this is related to my mom's situation and some intense work stress. Depressed, stress, or both, this seems situational and it will eventually pass.
(((((Catrin))))) Wishing you serenity ...
I've only met I think four TE'rs, but I would agree that nothing about them surprised me. :) I think perhaps that has as much to do with the "feel" of this forum, as it does with anything. People seem pretty authentic, here. It reminds me of the old days on CompuServe, which is where I met my DH. We'd known each other for two years there before we got together as a couple, and we were both pretty prepared for the problems we'd have in our relationship as well as the joys.
Catrin, can you go take a short ride or hike? Like 30 minutes? I have found short bouts of low intensity aerobic exercise helps a lot with stress. Sometimes you have to just drop everything and go.
(((((((Catrin)))))))
I find that long walks help me when I'm edgy. Or even just sitting outside on a nice day. I do not do well inside (particularly my home - though there is nothing wrong with it) for long periods of time. Chaos in my home (moving, etc.) makes it exponentially worse for me.
I'm much nicer in real life.
Hope you go for short rides Catrin. Enjoy the sunset or sunrise...
As for whether or not our personalities are what we are in person vs. Internet:
I know that for whatever reason some people here might respond in a way to me at times, that makes me really wonder..
My personal blog, Cycle Write reveals perhaps something more about who I am in spirit... what I value.
I'm so sorry you're struggling, Catrin. Try a yoga class. Yoga has gotten me through some stressful times and helped me work through painful emotions.
I just got in from an hour's ride where I was experimenting with a couple of things. I will post on it in the appropriate thread, but I do feel a bit better. The more stressed/depressed I get, the harder it gets for me to get my as* out the door - which makes me more stressed and it becomes just a self-propagating cycle. The chaotic surroundings from preparing to move just adds to it all. Today it was either Yoga or ride - and I rode since that was closer :) Next Saturday perhaps I can do both!
I'm nicer here. I could use a back space button irl.Quote:
Originally Posted by snapdragen
Bwah-ha-ha! :DQuote:
Originally Posted by redrhodie
Catrin, I'm sorry you've been feeling down. Even though I am essentially introverted too, I get really down if I spend too much time inside, and a chaotic environment makes that worse. In addition to your work stress and the issue you mention with your mother, are you lonely? I know if I feel lonely, it's so much the worse. If that's the case, getting into a group setting (yoga class or whatever), or meeting a friend for lunch or something similar -- instead of just hanging out on the computer, which I do far too often -- really help me. Since you are single, there's not always someone around to talk to, so perhaps that is part of your malaise. (Not that those of us who live with SOs aren't sometimes lonely as well!)
Best wishes -- I hope things will get cheerier once your move is behind you!
Emily
Emily - you have a good point - loneliness has been a constant companion for a long time, and usually I can deal with that. This is one of the reasons I've come to love my group training so much - fellow sufferers :) I really don't have the budget right now to meet anyone outside of the gym as there is pretty much a financial cost involved and moving is expensive. So add financial stress to my stressors...
I really appreciate the electronic shoulders and listening, and the feedback. It is so important - and hopefully once the move is behind me things will start looking up for me! I am talking with my sister about the advantages of getting my mom in home hospice care asap to give them both some relief. Regardless of MY stress, I know that of my sister and mom is far more.
LOL Red, love it :)
Catrin, let's meet for lunch. My treat or we can just brown bag it. I'm free the Tuesday after Labor Day if you are.
That would be very nice! That day should be fine with me, I will check my calendar tomorrow and shoot you an email.Quote:
Originally Posted by indysteel
Sounds good, Catrin!
I'm probably about the same here and irl. Maybe quieter here, because lately I don't bother to log in.Quote:
Originally Posted by redrhodie
Yay! I just bought two tickets to see David Sedaris in November. I've seen him multiple times, but this will be DH's first show. Plus, we're staying in Bloomington for the night (I went to schoold at I.U.), which means we'll get to eat some yummy food and enjoy the following day in one of my happy places. Even better, it's a long weekend thanks to Veteran's Day. So much win......
Indy - sweet! Always a huge bonus to have time away some place fun.
“The source of love is deep in us and we can help others realize a lot of happiness. One word, one action, one thought can reduce another person’s suffering and bring that person joy.”
― ThÃ*ch Nhất Hạnh
Been trying to work on this lately, seeing too much meanness in the wold, thought it might help if I didn't add to it.
Wise words, Pax. I'm sure the people in your orbit appreciate your efforts to put them into action. Thanks for putting that out here on TE.
Feeling better today so I went to the garage to swap out the stock saddles for the new Terry's (Cite X for me, Liberator X for my honey), got them on and we went for a short spin... I just love Terry saddles!!!!
Glad you got a nice ride in, Pax.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pax
I have long used Terry's Butterfly Tri-Gel saddle, which they unfortunately stopped making. I wasn't totally thrilled with the looks (I know, I know; I shouldn't place form over substance.....) of the closest one to the Tri Gel in their current line, so I finally ventured to another brand. But I wasn't happy about it. I wish I thought to hoard the Tri-Gel when I had a chance. :(
Yeah, not digging the looks of the new CiteX either. Weird white/pink/red writing on it... but it rides great! :)
Rode downhill today at the relatively new downhill park nearby. DANG, that's a lot of fun. Even though it costs an arm and a leg to rent bikes and gear and spend a day on the lifts. Everything from swooping, easy turns via jumps small, large and horrendous to gnarly, rocky, rooty awfulness.
FIL passed away this morning. He would've been 96 in three weeks. He was reasonably healthy until this spring.
DH is already there, I'll be heading out soon. Sadly, DH is the only one in the immediate family who has the slightest coping skills or willingness to accept help, and he can only do so much without threatening his own mental health. It's been pretty surreal ever since FIL went into heart failure in May and then developed delirium in the hospital. I'm a bit removed from all of it, but if you can spare a few serene thoughts for DH, MIL and SIL, I'm sure anything will help.
Thoughts and prayer are with you.
So sorry, Oak. Give our condolences to DH. Delirium just sucks. It was downhill from there when my FIL started with that.
Sorry Oak, my prayers and thoughts are with you, your DH and family.
Oak, wishing you & DH serenity in this very trying time.
I swear I am done, done, done organizing rides. I repeat - I am done, done, done organizing S24O's
Now I will go type this is bold letters, print out and paste on my wall next to my desk.
The straw the broke the camel's back. "Thanks so much for loaning us your Bob Trailer, can you bring it to the start of the ride (95 miles away) please" Uhhhh hello?
sky king- since they are so keen on riding I would politely suggest that they ride the 95 miles to come get themselves. But then I am A GRUMPY OLD SKINNY WHITE WOMAN WHO RIDES A BIKE. All I can wish is good luck and hold fast to your resolution.
My son is 31 today. I cannot really believe I have a child that old. I don't feel that old.
I feel your pain. I think it's the hardest when they reach their thirties. That's when it hits you; how fast time is going by. Then the grand kids come along and, whew. It starts going even faster. My oldest son will be 35 in January.Quote:
Originally Posted by Crankin
I was telling a friend of mine that my DH and I were having an anniversary dinner that night and she asked me how many years. I had to stop and think....hmmmm.... I thought maybe 35 or 36??? Then I started counting on my fingers. Holy crap, it was 38 years. That's nearly 40!! How did that happen?? Especially since I can't be more than 42 years old or so..,. Wait... (Counts on fingers again). Never mind. :-)
Oak,
My thoughts and prayers are with you during this trying time.
My daughter will be 37 when her first child and my first grandchild is born. How did she ever get old enough to have a baby? :confused:Quote:
Originally Posted by Crankin
I really am not looking forward to being called a grandmother. People constantly ask me if I "can't wait" or if I have any "news." I know my younger son will have kids, probably in 2 or 3 years, but I don't know if my older son will. We don't ask or talk about it.
I find these questions just as obnoxious as the mommy talk. It's just another way of bragging around here. The bragging has progressed from athletic or musical talent, AP classes, college acceptance, jobs, grad school, girlfriends, marriage. Thankfully, I on't see these people much anymore, but I do run into them when I am out shopping, etc.
Crankin,
I apologize if I you felt I was bragging. I was just trying to point out
. . . If I don't feel like I am old . . . let alone almost 62 . .. how could my daughter be 36? And to have a baby???? It just doesn't seem right/fair. I still feel like I am the 36 year old!
But I did get disgusted when people asked if I was ever going to be a grandma. It really wasn't any of their business. Besides, what was I supposed to do about it anyway?
I never had kids but DH has two and one of those kids has two kids.
I call myself a "grandmother by proxy."
Same here, partner is grandfather of 2. One of them finally learned to bike at 11 yrs. Parents just never got around to motivating kid.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dogmama
However I don't see myself even grandmother by proxy. But most definitely I am a proud aunt of 7 nieces and nephews with the eldest niece @26 yrs. I don't talk much about them with friends.
Kajero, I didn't mean *you* were bragging. I meant people I know around where I live. I sometimes see some of them when I occasionally get my nails done at one of those cheapo nail places, or in the grocery store. And, I agree, it's none of my business and I don't give advice unless asked. Younger son recently told me they would probably have kids when his wife graduates and starts working as an RN, and he is still in school, as it will help with child care. My DH was a stay at home dad (though not with him) and we discussed how this really affected his viewpoint on fathering and how I thought it was a great idea for my son. He will be a great parent. So would my other son, but his wife had a very dysfunctional upbringing and I think she is scared.