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I hear ya', but I've accepted that we guys need to be more careful/sensitive on this board. For instance, Bluetree gave me a name I thought was hilarious:Quote:
Originally Posted by El Hombre
:D :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Bluetree
I accepted the moniker into my signature line...but I honestly didn't see the double entendre that someone else found as offensive coming from a man...so I changed it.:)
I really had to think about this one for a while. I typically refer to women as girls, particularly if they are around my age (30) or younger. I can't see calling a 70-year-old woman a girl in conversation. But I often find myself talking about a "woman" and I call her a girl. To me, it feels closer, like she's part of my club or something. I can also be found saying chic... often referring to a girl I think is pretty cool. "Woman" feels so official or categorical to me. Not to mention we're fighting for a term that has "man" in the title.
Girls and guys is usually the way I go.
I'm trying to find that balance myself. I do get the occasional hostile PM saying I have no business being here and I should "stfu".Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Silver
It's just a matter of figuring out where I should and shouldn't be posting and how to get my point across such that people realize my intent is pure.
Ladies, Women, et all --- I DO know him, and he's right. You dare him, he'll do it. I won't be surprised in the least if we see banana keepers in our Rapunzel goodie bags. :DQuote:
Originally Posted by El Hombre
In keeping with the discussion, I'm pretty easy-going about what I'm called. Although I'm 37 and look way younger (so I'm told), young store clerks occasionally do call me M'am, and it sorta stirs some protest within me, but I brush it off to perhaps what they were taught or told to say by their parents, employers, etc. Generally, I give people the benefit of the doubt and try to be fair and laid-back with my reactions, unless they say it in mean spirit. BUT, get some good 'ol boy calling me "Sweetie", "Sweetheart", "Darlin'", "Doll", "Honey", or any other demeaning name, and it's hackles-up time and I'm spittin' fire. It happens rarely, thank goodness. :) I love the phrase "you go girl." It sortof empowers me and I hope to empower others with it also, although the people I usually say it to are good friends and acquaintances, not strangers. And I usually shout "Let's go/good job, Ladies" (or a specific person's name) at races, for lack of anything better to say, usually!
Mr. Silver -- oh believe me, he's definitely restraining himself. LOL And from years of knowing him, I have to agree with him that he definitely does not do PC well (you nailed it El Hombre! :p ) -- he's being an angel here on the TE boards and if I can speak for him, is totally committed in helping to put together an awesome women's-only ride for Seattle and Washington state, which is why he started posting here. The more times he can mention the new ride, the better, and obviously making enemies of TE members here is not good PR! :)
Zen -- I see and understand your point about the ride names. I've ridden the Cinderella three times now and I admit I've always sorta disliked the name in its negative connotation. But the ride is ALOT of fun, the costumes are downright hilarious, the food's great and plentiful, the volunteers (Prince's) are always helpful, and it's just an overall total blast. If one looks at it for what it is, it's just a ride name meant to be cute, unique, easily-recognizable, etc. The new Repunzel Classic ride is attempting to model the excellent example that the LRRH and Cinderella rides have set, and by choosing a similar fairy-tale name, is hoping to be thought of in the same way as it's predecessors.
Oh, and if I could choose, I'd be rescued by Lassie or the Lone Ranger (his horse ROCKS!....hiho Silver...Away!). Back in the days of knights and castles, I would have let the knight rescue me, but then I would have stole his horse and rode off into the sunset alone. :D :D
As for you, El Hombre......:
Depending on how badly you piss off my friends here at TE, I might take the 3rd option. LOL :p :pQuote:
Originally Posted by El Hombre
:D :p
BikeMomma
I moved from the south to a racially mixed neighborhood in michigan when I was young. A lot of my friends were black so a lot of my friends' moms were black. Not calling them "ma'am" was begging to be smacked upside the head.Quote:
Originally Posted by LBTC
There is still a picture in my head of black women that I had better call "ma'am" or I'll get smacked again.
It has nothing to do with racial tensions or lack thereof.
Did you just call my wife a horse????:eek:Quote:
Originally Posted by BikeMomma
:D
:D :D I wondered if I'd get a response from either of you!Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Silver
As I love horses like crazy and think (the horse) Silver was beeeauutiful steed, you could consider it a compliment, I suppose! :p
Ha! Tooo funny....;)
~BikeMomma
Originally Posted by El Hombre
If you knew me, you'd know I never shy from a dare.
I got a dare for ya
Well said Velogirl!!Quote:
Originally Posted by velogirl
I have done LRRH and I thought it was a great ride. As far as the name goes well I thought it was a fun name but then being an Aussie I never take things too seriously. I even have a lovely LRRH jersey and wear it with pride.
If Silver were a horse;), she'd be a strong, lean, muscular thoroughbred:DQuote:
Originally Posted by BikeMomma
That's was methinks.
I like 'go girl' and don't have a problem with 'guys' for a group of mixed gender (although probably only if the group is about the same age or younger than the speaker). I also associate 'lady' with upper class and an uptight attitidue to manners and doing the 'proper' thing - so I prefer woman.
I must admit I found it a bit strange when my bosses secretary called me 'doll' in a work email last week.
I dunno, even since watching Little Britain, the phrase "I'm a lady" has taken on an entirely new meaning...
"Two ladies on a BI-CIC-KLE`! Pay no heed!"
http://lucas-walliams.project76.tv/F...ies-Tandem.jpg
I'm a bit of a country bogan. Everyone's called mate and my closest friends and BF get the term of endearment, "DAHL!" which is short for "darling"
I like being reffered to as woman though, It's somehow empowering I guess.
LOL - bogan - I haven't heard that one for awhile. Im not sure bogans ride bicycles mate they are too busy doing laps in their big V8s hee hee back home in WA we call them bog laps.:D light _sabre a bogan......I dont think so!:DQuote:
Originally Posted by light_sabe_r
Just yesterday I ran into a woman friend in the cafe in town. I'm 53 and she is about 45. At the very same moment we greeted each other simultaneously- me saying "Hey, Girl!" and she saying "Hey, Woman!". It was too funny.
I suspect she says "woman" because she is about 8 years younger than me and was growing up during the big women's lib era, while I was pretty much grown up already when that was going on.
Maybe it's just her preference.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa S.H.
I started saying "hey woman" when I had a roommate from Barbados who always said that. I liked the way it sounded, especially with her island accent.
Something similar happened at work the other day. A group of us was in the break room for lunch and another group came into the room (all of us are females). The incoming group said "Hey, guys" while the group already in the room said, "Hey, girls." We all laughed. Nobody was offended - it was just funny.Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa S.H.
Deb
Hmmm...I spent my early years in Barbados and remember our maid and my nanny referring to SilverMother as "mistress"... - yah' manQuote:
Originally Posted by zencentury
Lest you get the wrong idea, labor was cheap in Barbados in the '60's
I'm 47 and say "Hey Woman" to all my friends upon greeting. It's definitely (in my area anyway) an age thing. The young ones say "Hey Girl" the older ones say "Hey Ladies (or Gals)".Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa S.H.
She was only allowed to call me that when we were wearing our special outfits;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Silver
Queen- I guess that makes me one of th eYoung Ones then! :p
Zen- too funny!
There was a nurses aid in my mother's nursing home a couple years ago- he was from the caribbean islands somewhere too- he used to call my mother "Mistress" as well. We kept trying to convince him to call her simply by "Mrs.___" but he kept on the same. :rolleyes:
Just in the last few days, I have had a little spate of being called Honey and Hon...both in person and on the phone, by women who were definitely in my age range. ETA: Both in work settings, sometimes theirs, sometimes mine (no one in my office...but folks on the phone).
Maybe because my Mom used to call us Honey in a motherly way (which was great from my MOM), when we were kids, I tend to feel condescended to when I'm called Honey.
I'm kind of just dumbfounded when this happens...like, did I just hear that? It always prompts in my mind the question, How Old Are You, Anyway?
OK, just letting off steam. :o
Starfish-
I don't know if this is true for others, but I notice that the women who call people Hon or Honey in my town are the ones who seem less highly educated- I only experience the "hon syndrome" from women cashiers in the supermarket, from diner waitresses, receptionists, and from people working in WalMart or the Dairy Queen, etc.
Maybe it's a socio/educational kind of thing? Just my own observations, not trying to stereotype anyone....
But, assuming that the cashier is less highly educated is stereotyping. ;)
I think people who use that term are just more social and people oriented. They're probably more gregarious and outgoing than the average person. The gregarious person probably is drawn to customer service jobs where they deal with people all day.
Karen
I do know what you mean. I used to waitress full time, and I also used to work in fast food restaurants full time. But i do think that it is a fact that "in general", people in minimum wage jobs have fewer higher educational degrees than people in higher paying jobs. That's not a stereotype- it's just generally true. There are many exceptions to this of course- and maybe more exceptions these days than there were ten years ago. Making that assumption about a particular person would be stereotyping I think.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tuckervill
I know lots of gregarious and outgoing people of various backgrounds, incomes, and educational levels, but they don't all call me "Hon". :rolleyes:
Reading this whole thread has shown me that it is really difficult for everyone, or even just for woman, to agree on what they "should" be called by others. There is so much variety! There is no term that offends nobody. Maybe the closest one is "women", but even there it can be tricky depending on circumstances and context.
"Ma'am" is generally considered respectful....but it makes me feel so OLD! :(
Once DH and I were out dining in a fancy restaurant with a couple in their 70's who are very near and dear to us. The man proceeded to continually call the waitress (in her late 30's) "Princess". I was secretly mortified and embarrassed, but did I really want to correct a man in his 70's who is about the sweetest gentlest soul on earth? I was greatly relieved when the waitress handled it smoothly and didn't bat an eye. She understood that he was just trying to make her feel "special" (gag, gag) and she made allowances for his age. I remember dealing with that (and way worse) when I was a waitress. Ugh. I usually adjusted my reactions based upon the perceived intent of whatever was said. If the intent was to make someone feel "less", then I would react. Sometimes we just have to pick our battles.
Yep!Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa S.H.
Yeah, I know. I do get it. After all, my Dad was a B-17 Pilot in WWII...I mean, I understand gauging intent, generational issues, etc.Quote:
I usually adjusted my reactions based upon the perceived intent of whatever was said. If the intent was to make someone feel "less", then I would react. Sometimes we just have to pick our battles.
Also, I am sympathetic about the stereotyping issue, although I do understand there are generally true statistics about types of jobs/education, etc. I am in a business where normally I work in and out of my own office, etc, but I have to take "floor time" shifts to answer phones about twice/week. We don't have a receptionist, all of us in the office just share that work. I find it interesting to see how I am spoken to when people assume I am the receptionist (which, BTW, I have done a lot of in my earlier life) vs. when they realize I am not. I notice this difference both on the phone and with walk-ins, with both men & women.