Fear & age?

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I have a hard time accepting aging and I dislike people who "embrace" their oldness. Some of my issues are from my own peculiar health issues that I have struggled with off and on since I was much younger. But, I still keep at it and it helps to surround myself with others who are extremely fit.

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Crankin, I assume you meant people who "embrace" their oldness, by becoming unhealthy/not fit because they chose to slack off/not pay attention to what they were eating, etc.

I agree that it helps to be around some people who share and practice some healthy habits. I know I've lost some perspective on average health and fitness of older men, because I'm around dearie...who is 70. He's not superman, but he is fit with ongoing effort to eat healthy (80% of time, like most people) and yea, I have low level worry when he tells me about his winter cycling this winter on his studded tires.. But I don't say much to him except ask how his rides are. Today he chose to remain on the paths where there are no cars and the pathways are more clear/less slippery. Not totally. Whereas I saw a number of (primarily) male cyclists rolling along on their studded tires through slush, etc. on roads with cars. He cycled around 20 km. today. I haven't been cycling at all for past 6 days, because of our snowfall and snow/ice is on roads that is part of my normal work commute route.

Yesterday, he was musing to me 8 years ago, how he did cycle from Toronto to Montreal....in 3 days. Which meant 1-2 days of cycling 190 km. per day. Yeaa, I guess he was 62 yrs. I didn't clue in at that time, for age vs. distance. I only paid attention to the daily distance. I am a dork at times.) He says now, he could not /would not want to do that distance in 1 day.

Sooooooo....aging, capability, self-confidence or just happy ignorance (with some fitness training to prevent injury) and taking some precaution, results in situations where each person responds differently to their slow physical decline.

In my opinion, balanced mental health is important and becomes even more so as we age, but still do fitness activities with some adjustments. This is why I put cycling as equally important to me...as my blogging, art. And it is another reason why my personal blog, it's not solely about cycling. I don't wish to become a person who falls into deep depression just because I can't cycle as well/cycle at all.I can't guarantee such self-protection, but just want have a handful, not just 1 passion that I love to practice/indulge.

Here I am just a few days ago:

http://fitisafeministissue.files.wor...h-dec-2013.jpg

ShootingStar, I meant that I have friends who are excitedly bragging about joining AARP, complaining about their aches and pains, living for the day they can become snowbirds and spend half the year in FL, and saying things like "at our age..."
I agree, you do need balance for your mental health. I dread the day when I can't ride, but that's when I'll be walking outside or doing chair aerobics! (sigh, we used to make fun of instructors who taught that when I worked at gyms). I just don't want to get old. There's longevity in my family, with fairly good quality of life, so I expect to have to adapt my exercise habits as I'll be around for awhile.

I don't mind getting older (at least not much), I mind not being able to do the things I love. As long as those things require a certain level of physical fitness, I'm going to strive to keep fit. But I would be naive if I expected myself to be as fast or as strong or as fearless now as when I was 20 years younger. I do know however that stamina "ages well", it just takes consistent training and not too many injuries. And general good health is of course something that everyone can work at and benefit from, at every age.

At some point my priorities may change. I don't mean that that I will ever happily accept poor health, but maybe keeping fit just might not seem so important, maybe because the effort overshadows the rewards, maybe because I've gained other interests in life. I don't know. I think that's what I think of in the term "aging gracefully" - not trying to be as fit or feel as "young" as possible, but making active choices about how to keep yourself capable of doing the things you enjoy doing.

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Originally Posted by Crankin

ShootingStar, I meant that I have friends who are excitedly bragging about joining AARP, complaining about their aches and pains, living for the day they can become snowbirds and spend half the year in FL, and saying things like "at our age..."

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I pretty much avoid people who use the phrase "at our age."

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Originally Posted by Crankin

ShootingStar, I meant that I have friends who are excitedly bragging about joining AARP, complaining about their aches and pains, living for the day they can become snowbirds and spend half the year in FL, and saying things like "at our age..."

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You have weird friends. :D

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Originally Posted by lph

I think that's what I think of in the term "aging gracefully" - not trying to be as fit or feel as "young" as possible, but making active choices about how to keep yourself capable of doing the things you enjoy doing.

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well put and that's hopefully how I'll look at it!!!!

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Originally Posted by PamNY

I pretty much avoid people who use the phrase "at our age."

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Generally speaking, folks who say such things appear to think that I am from another planet ;)

But then, "at my age" I *do* need more recovery time to get the benefit of a hard workout, and to avoid injury, and I'm not shy about admitting it, even to athletes older than I am. I know someone my same age who's been following a cookie-cutter training plan and getting very little benefit out of it, and it's pretty obvious to me that it doesn't include enough recovery time for someone our age ...

You know, the year I did CFC and my first half marathon seems like forever ago, and in many ways it was, but it was only four years ago, and it's relevant to this thread in a few different ways.

That was the year I turned 50. I'd been afraid to do CFC ever since I heard of it. I just decided that I was old enough NOT to be afraid of hard work and pain, and I trained for it, and I did it in the chilly rain, and with what's happened to me since I may never do it again, but I did it. And I zoomed down some of those 25% grades on rough pavement in the rain and wasn't afraid of that either.

But then I got hurt ... and it wasn't so much slow healing that's been the huge problem, it's been that I couldn't find good treatment and so when I did heal, it was with everything still misaligned and a whole lot of muscles and tendons left significantly shorter than the bones they're supposed to be aligning. And the way age played into all that was the accumulation of minor injuries and misalignments over the years, that have all contributed to my ongoing problems.

But also, there's the emotional strain that comes with being our age. Deaths and extended illness of family members, increased responsibility, problems with children for those who have them, etc. That takes a toll on the physical body and training capacity, too. It will show in resting heart rate and in results.

Melavai, those friends are what I call "regular" people, not any of my cycling friends. And Catrin, I agree, those people humor me because I have known them since 1990, when I was doing "acceptable" exercise at the gym, not "weird outdoor stuff." Or boot camp. Sometimes even younger acquaintances look at me like I'm from another planet.
Oak, I know I need more recovery and I do not ignore that. I stopped nordic skiing earlier than my friends on Sunday, and I am glad, even though the reason was because DH was starting to fall and knew he had had it! I took 2 full days off and I needed it after 3 days of snow sports. I know I sound like I am not aging gracefully, at least in my acceptance of the inevitable. That's why I keep on trucking and every few weeks go out with my cycling group which is full ofpeople just like me, who are up to age 90 or so!

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Originally Posted by OakLeaf

But then, "at my age" I *do* need more recovery time to get the benefit of a hard workout, and to avoid injury, and I'm not shy about admitting it, even to athletes older than I am. I know someone my same age who's been following a cookie-cutter training plan and getting very little benefit out of it, and it's pretty obvious to me that it doesn't include enough recovery time for someone our age ...

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That is true Oakleaf, and I've learned the hard way that I need a bit more rest/recovery than the young things I train with. THAT is something rather different from the group I was referring to - the ones who won't lift a finger because "they are too old"...or "one shouldn't do that at our age", and they are MY age! That is all I was referring to, that fear of activity because of some arbitrary age. There are aches and pains that come from movement, and very different injuries that come from being too sedentary.

Getting old ain't for sissies. What I do enjoy is that I have moved beyond needing to compare what I do to what others do. Although I will confess to pushing back on limitations, I do make a conscious effort to "play smart". I avoid group rides, I avoid high traffic roads, I realize a "full day" of skiing for me is a bit shorter than when I was in my 20's.

The DH wrote a pretty soul barring blog post just prior to our Death Valley trip that fits somewhat into this thread. Here is the last sentence: "I will die…. violently, peacefully, suddenly, unexpectedly, accidentally or by my own hand…. I will die. But right now I want to go ride my bicycle in the desert."

I guess that saying (getting old ain't for sissies)is emblematic of what I mean. Why say that? If you think you're old, you'll act it. This is apart from slowing down or needing more rest when exercising like most of us do. What exactly is it, about getting old that's not for sissies? From my perspective, I'm more self aware, I have a lot more money, and I have a job I love. I don't let negative people bring me down and I've divested myself from all relatives who are dysfunctional. If an emergency or something bad happens, I can handle it a lot better now than I could when I was 20, 30, or even 40. My life has not been perfect, but maybe because most of the bad stuff happened when I was young, I have a different view.
I think people say this as it applies to health problems. If you are active, a lot of those things just aren't a problem. Of course, cycling, etc. does not totally protect you from disease, but it sure helps you survive illness mentally. What I do makes me tough. Sure, I may be more cautious, but my frame of mind is different than a lot of others I know.

Hm, I don't understand why you dislike the phrase. To me it means (roughly) "as you get older things you took for granted when you were young become harder work. You'll need to keep up regular training, you'll need more rest, you'll be more aware of aches and pains, and injuries will take longer to heal. So toughen up." In other words - don't stop doing active stuff, and don't complain if it's a bit harder work. I think that's a pretty good message.

I'm with Crankin there. I hate that phrase, and not just for the misogyny/homophobia of the word "sissy." I've never heard anyone use the phrase whose understanding of the aging process was "more recovery, but also more intervals."

Which is not to say I haven't heard people use the phrase who were trying to stay active in their frailty. But they haven't been working smart, just making stabs at trying to do things they no longer could, not trying to improve their form, using weights that were too heavy, etc.

I don't know, because I'm not there yet, and I don't really intend to get there ... I do know that aging makes it harder and harder to adjust to new things, and maybe they really can't learn. But I wasn't really joking when I said I'd get a new sport. Just as some people say they'll be done when they can't learn new ideas ... I'll be done when I can't learn new things about my body.

Ohhhhh sorry, didn't mean to offend anybody. It is a weird phrase isn't it. For me it means much as lph says. The "alternative" is something that will happen eventually and in the meantime I think great conversations, like this thread are invaluable. I will always remember by FIL saying to my DH that he thought my DH was getting to old for that crazy stuff - riding his bike! and he had just turned 50. You can all imagine my DH's response to that :)

Oakleaf, you hit it on target. People i know who use that phrase are not worrying about recovery periods or trying out a new sport.
Sky King, I am not offended by you, I just think that it's something people say when they have aged poorly, because maybe, unlike most of us, they have not given a thought to the long term effects of their lifestyle on their health. And, I just hate the negativity it projects.
I think I have strong feelings about all of this because when I was a kid and into my teens, I was totally unathletic. I'm still uncoordinated in a lot of ways, but once I had a inkling that I had some endurance ability, my feelings about a lot of stuff has changed. Being fit secretly boosts my ego in a way that could have helped a lot when I was younger.

Right. People I know who say something of the sort are usually active types who have been active their whole lives, and are griping about how things take more effort. Good-naturedly, I might add :). I can see that it sounds very different if people say it by way of complaining that their age is the sole reason that they're unfit or whatever.

Come to think of it, I don't hang out much (or at least listen much to) people in that second category... :-D

I think I'm more on the "fear" side knowing risks can happen (especially being clumsy hihi). I also know by experience now that falling can lead to longer recovery/healing. The older you get, the longer it may take and I would not like to impact my future for a "stupid" move I may have tried and flunk. hihi

BUT!!!! I probably was one of the rare persons who was jumping up and down when I turned 50 last year. That meant it was the decade in which I retire. Finally got there! Only 6 years max to go. We've always been active, although less in some part of our lives. We will still be active, differently and it does take longer to recup from tougher gym sessions.

Aging bothers me because yes it limits some things we used to do (because of previous injuries/surgeries that impacted life), we are more thoughful in activity choices, etc. But other than this, we are the same. And I do tend to stick to people who are active like us. I don't need whiners in our lives. You generally live the life you want to live, except for illnesses like cancer, etc, which you can't really control.