Deanna,
Please post or PM me the info. If my Mom has a ride I will be there, I don't care if it snows :o Thanks for posting the info.
Will you be there? I was hoping to meet under better circumstances but still would be nice to meet up.
Printable View
Deanna,
Please post or PM me the info. If my Mom has a ride I will be there, I don't care if it snows :o Thanks for posting the info.
Will you be there? I was hoping to meet under better circumstances but still would be nice to meet up.
10:00 AM • Howarth Park (630 Summerfield Rd - in Eastern Santa Rosa)
A three-mile Memorial Ride of Silence will travel from Howarth Park to the Center for Spiritual Living (2075 Occidental Rd) preceding the service for Kathy Hiebel on Saturday, December 2.
This is not a recreational ride, nor is it a stage for political theater. It is our way, as cyclists, of honoring the memory of our friend Kathy.
The route: down Sonoma Avenue, around City Hall ( R on D, L on 1st) to the Prince Memorial Greenway; exit the path at Pierson, then follow 3rd and Stony Point to Occidental Road.
As much as possible, we will ride in silence and single-file or at most two-up. We will attempt to keep the group together and may regroup on the Greenway if signals have split the group. Pace will be slow: this is a procession, not a paceline.
Cycling apparel is considered appropriate for the service, but we hope to have allowed enough time for people to change out of bike clothes at the church, if they wish to do so.
Parking at the start is limited. Riding to the start is encouraged. Secure bike parking at church, courtesy of the SCBC.
Trek, Duck, & UK--my condolences for your loss. And to all of us, because it is so hard to hear that another cyclist has been fatally injured.
I've just sent a letter to the editor of the Santa Rosa Press Democrat http://www.pressdemocrat.com/services/feedback.html about Mary Callahan's article. Y'all are right, it IS overly graphic and in poor taste. So I wanted to let the SRPD know how this Coloradoan feels about articles like Callahan's.
My heart goes out to everyone who knew Kathy. She sounds like a wonderful nurse and a wonderful human being.
Well I arrived about 15 minutes before ride start there were 4 people there, two of whom were obviously not riding.
I thought, "I'm glad I came, there are so few here."
It was also very cold or what passes for cold here.
But as I got the bike down, checked the tires, found my full finger gloves riders came from every direction. Down the hill, through the park, both streets, bikes kept appearing.
Maury rode to ride start on their Calfee tandem, one of Kathys jerseys carefully folded and strapped to the stokers saddle.
We hugged and cried.
He said on his way there a driver rolled his window down and in a friendly way pointed at the bike
"hey buddy, you're missing something"
"yes, I miss her, she's dead"
Best to be honest at this time.
After a brief intro to the ride we set off. The only sound riders clipping in or out. We were not too far down when I heard someone ask if I was from TE (must be the AV vest and arm skins ). It was Deanna so we rode briefly together, I lost track of her at the memorial itself.
Thanks for letting me know about this and thanks TE.
At one point I fell back in the pack and could really see the line of riders, we went on and on. I heard someone say there were well over 100 riders, I'd guess far more.
Drivers and the community were aware of the ride; there was some honking (the short beep beeps of aproval not laying on the horn), a few cars flashed lights, others waved or gave thumbs up. I also was aware that as we got close to the church some cars would just drive next to us which felt like they were "protective" of us.
We got to the church and rolled in, my Mom was there. My Mom said she thinks this show of support must be very comforting to Kathys family. And she's been impressed by the kindness cyclists show to others and each other.
The service itself was very moving.
But I was telling Knott I'm having trouble right now with the whole pink fluffy clouds and safe with G** thang and she's safe with all the family that preceeded her.
Kathy, who was never mad at anybody and had a smile for everyone and every situation...I think she'd be p*ssed off. I know I am. I never got to ride with her. Can you believe we never did? "I think she's saying scr%w these wings, it's Dec 2 and perfect weather I should be riding with Maury"
Best to not get too philosophical here.
After the service and food I had to ride back. I'd been offered to put my bike in the back of someones car but felt like I needed a ride.
Club members told me the best thing would be hang out at the bike racks (Santa Rosa Cycling club brought racks and guarded our bikes) and find someone headed back to Howarth Park.
Did not take me long to find a very nice rider headed that way. We chatted as we rode back.
Hi all,
I'm Kathy's Fiance and Trek 420's cousin. I wanted to thank all of you for your love and support.
Losing Kathy so abruptly, and while things were so blissful for us, has been very hard. I'm an incurable optimist, but grief has a way of tinting everything.
Kathy loved life with so much passion that I feel a certain responsibility to honor her and our relationship by moving forward as best I can. I'm riding some and back to work. I've never been fond of being without a partner in life, however I'm finding the strength to be alone now. I need to remind myself that I've done the Terrible Two twice (Kathy riding the last few miles with me both times) and that I must have more inner strength than I sometimes feel. Right now just about everything brings up memories of her, and how memories are all I'll have of her now. I cry a bit then get on to the next task.
If you're in the area please give me a call and maybe we can take a ride. Riding is great therapy for me. MTB or road both fine. I know the roads and trails if you don't. HM. 707-579-9129/Cell 707-416-7244
Thanks again.
I'm happy to answer any questions you might have about Kathy or the accident.
Maury,
Our hearts go out to you. There are no adequate words, except that your strength through such unimaginable awfulness is already an inspiration to so many, and will be for a long, long time to come. Know that hundreds of us are sending you their heartfelt healing wishes.
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. ***crying***
To see her in that photo, so obviously full of joy and life... it's heartbreaking. Sending thoughts of hope and courage to those who have suffered such a loss.
how incredibly moving!!! must have been a heart-tugging site to see Maury ride up on the tandem...
my heart is heavy...please continue to find your daily strength! TE is a wonderful place...it is soothing to see such love!
trek, duck,& family...my codolences!
Maury...may you be strong & keep inner peace!
Maury,
My sincerest condolences, I am so sorry. Thank you for coming to TE and for posting that wonderful picture.
There just aren't words, but know that I'm thinking of you (as are many here).
Visit TE often, this is a good place, and the women on TE care deeply.
Knot
Maury, thank you for sharing that with us. I didn't know Lisa personally, but send you, your friends and family, and those on TE who knew her, my deepest sympathy. I hope all of you find the love and support you need to get through this time.
Kate
I'm so sorry, I hardly know what to say--just extend my sympathy and support. Thanks, Maury, for having the fortitude and sensitivity to share with us. Despite our distances from one another, we're all with you now.
Hey Maury,
That picture of you two made me smile. You guys look so happy, enjoying the bike, the ride, and each other's company. From what I hear of Kathy, there must be many pictures of her exactly like that one.
I am so sorry for your loss. Hang in there, our thoughts are with you.
Holy crap, I just read the article. It's written as if we should all find descriptions of exactly how people died and what they looked like afterward in the newspaper every day. Maybe if I was watching Law and Order or CSI or reading a "true crime" novel I'd expect this kind of description, but an article in the paper? It looks like they were going for the dramatic effect, but it's just... not right. Then, in the comments, everyone posts about every rude bicyclist they have ever encountered.
Some people's children!! I tell ya. :mad:
Hey Cuz! I'm so glad you found this board.
On behalf of the board I hearby nominate you an honorary woman, at least as far as visiting rights to TE is concerned.
Come on out and ride with us.
We're a much nicer group than that other roadbikereview board ahem.
And....we actually get out and ride together. :) and eat
The California rides are posted here, we have an assault on Mt Diablo this weekend but tut tut looks like rain?
http://forums.teamestrogen.com/forumdisplay.php?f=61
I'm sure Kate meant to say Kathy...Quote:
Originally Posted by indysteel
Maury: We are all so sad for you. From what I can tell, Kathy was the greatest gal in the world. You're in all of our minds and hearts and if you need to talk, or write, or ride, whatever it takes to help you feel a little bit better, the girls from TE will be there for you.
I wish I lived closer to you I'd be happy to go ride the mountain bike with you, but I no longer live in California. Hang in there. I know it is not easy.
jan
Maury,
Thank you so much for sharing your picture of you and Kathy with all of us at TE. Although most of us here never met Kathy in person, she had such a beautiful smile, and you both look very happy together. I’m sure you must miss her terribly, and I can only imagine how painful it has been to lose her so tragically. Sending you much love and big hugs from Massachusetts.
Wendy
My heartfelt condolences to all who loved Kathy. Everytime I read about one of these senseless incidents, I feel so angry, and so incredibly powerless. In so many of these circumstances, it's clear the cyclist did nothing wrong, was visible, had the right of way, etc. yet the law does nothing to the perpetrator of the crime.
I have a slightly different take on the graphicness of the article. As difficult as it was to read, in some ways I think that's good. Drivers fling their vehicles around our roadways in irresponsible manners, with little regard for other human life. If the graphicness of that article could make some of those drivers stop and think about their behavior, perhaps even modify it, and to consider the true impact it would have if they kill someone, perhaps there will be a positive benefit to it.
Here in Oregon, we do not have a vehicular homicide law. Prosecuting a driver for killing a cyclist requires proving reckless negligence. Mere "ordinary negligence" allows the driver to get off scot free (Or with some ridiculous $200 ticket for failure to yield or some other such nonsense). There are forces afoot here in Oregon to have a vehicular homicide law passed.
Is there one in the state you live in? If not, and this all makes you as angry as it makes me, perhaps you should consider getting involved in a campaign to have one passed.
Maury, Thank you for posting the picture of the two of you on your tandem. It is a wonderful way for all of us to remember her.
Sadly,
Susan
goosebumpsQuote:
Originally Posted by Trek420
i grew up in NoCal...feel a distant connection to your sisterhood in the area!
would say much more but 1-handed....sorry!:o
Trek, Maury, Duck - you and your families are in my prayers....
My sincerest sympathies
Maury,
Your dear kathy looked like an amazing lady and lucky to have such a wonderful man in her life.
My wish for you is strength. Be strong for you and take your time to heal.
I know i'm far away but my thoughts are with you & your family.
c
I'm planning to go on our local club ride tomorrow. This was the same 2nd Friday ride that Kathy was headed to when she left us. I may take the same route that she did, around the same time. Maybe I'll see the same recycling truck and I can see if he uses his signal or if his emergency flashers are on (which I was told by another driver recently is their policy). I'm a bit obsessed with creating an image of what she saw last.
Yesterday was one of the best I've had in a while. Today started off with lots of sadness. I expect this will be the case for a while; these ups and downs. I should think of them as "rollers" like we used to blow over on the tandem. Kathy loved to stand up and blast past single bikes on the small uphills. ; )
Keep the rubber side down all.
Maury
Maury,Quote:
Originally Posted by Maury Cohen
You are doing all the things that you feel you need to do right now. The image creating thing is totally normal. Do whatever comes to you as an urge, no matter whether the act may on the surface seem odd, morbid, sweet, or sad. Doesn't matter- it's a healing act, and that's good. Avoid what feels just too painful for the moment, you can always come back to it later on if you need to, or not. You call the shots right now.
I spoke with my husband last night about what I would want him to do if I died. I told him that if that ever happened, I wanted him above all to NOT suffer alone and withdraw into himself. I said I would want him to allow all our friends in to surround him with love and strength, and that he should go forward and stay active and a positive force. The thing that would make me unhappiest is for him to go through his pain and grief all alone and in silence.
You are doing the very things that Kathy would have wanted.
Have a good ride tomorrow. Ride on in her spirit.
I was okay reading this until Trek's description of the 'Missing Stoker' on the tandem. Maury, what great strength you must have within to get through that day. Stay strong, and stay safe.
I am mostly a lurker here, but this story has touched me.
I am so sorry for your loss, and wish you healing and lovely memories.
Laura
Maury, thank you for posting the photo of you and Kathy. It's good to see you two together, doing what brought you joy and fun.
I believe Kathy is incredibly proud of you, for keeping on and staying the course. You are an inspiration. Keep riding through those 'rollers.'
How was the ride today, or did weather cancel?
The Friday ride was good. I rode the route Kathy was taking a month ago when she was killed en route to the same monthly ride. I was feeling frisky so rode towards the front of the group for a time. I have a tendency to hang back if I realize there are riders back, which I eventually did. This seems to often place me in a 'limbo" between the faster and slower groups.
While I worked to bridge back up to the leaders I made up this Limmerick:
Some fast riders went off at full toot,
By a very circuitous route.
Though somre were much slower,
one kicked in his blower,
Though by coffee his legs were kapuut.
Last evening was the SRCC Holiday Dinner. This is where Kathy proposed to me a year ago, and I didn't want to attend at first but decided I'd have lots of support there so I did go. It was fine until the party broke up. Last year I went home with a Fiancee. This year only memories. I'll tell you, it feels like it's going to be a long "tour" getting through this.
Maury
Hey Cousin,
Yes, I hear that Kathy got down on one knee and proposed to you?
TE, she was quite a gal.
Hang in there, I imagine it's a long tour but you're welcome to drop in here for the "rest stops" for rest and refueling to take the analogy way too far.
Your cousin
Trek
Tears and condolences from Canada. Kathy sounds like such an amazing woman, and not one soon forgotten.
Roads up here are treacherous in the winter: bike lanes not plowed, and drivers don't expect cyclists on the road. I will have Kathy in my mind with every commute as a reminder to ride safe.
I just wanted to say something that has been on my mind...
Even though I never met Kathy or Maury, I still think of them both every single day, and every time I ride my bike. I know I will for a long time to come.
Kathy's tragic accident affected me very much. It was (and is) so very heartbreaking.
Yet to witness the example of Maury's deep strength, love, and openness...well it has been such a profound inspiration to me.
I just wanted to thank Maury for opening his heart to us all. I know now from reading about her that Kathy was a truly extraordinary woman, and I have no doubt that she would have shown the very same qualities that Maury has, had the situation been reversed.
Thank you so much for having given us the honor of sharing just a little in your grieving. Beauty, love, and joy will never abandon such a full heart.
Lisa Johnson
Maury, Trek, Duck, and uk. I'm sitting here crying while reading this thread. I'm so sorry this has happened. :( You are all in my thoughts.
Mel
BTW Melody, how are YOU doing lately? Much better, I hope. And thanks for your thoughts. :)
Duck, I'm doing ok though I'm getting over a 2.5 day migraine and somehow I've gotten a cold. :/ I missed 3 days of work which kind of sucks since I'm now behind in several projects but I'll get back.
The big thing that's going on right now is that as of today my doctor has put me on insulin. I've known I was diabetic since I was 18 (though I was diabetic way before then). Unfortunately, my glucose control just isn't what it used to be. We've tried modifying my meds to try to avoid having me go on insulin but at this point my body just doesn't make insulin like it used to so he has added it to my medication mix. He still has me on my other diabetic meds since I also have insulin resistance.
We're starting me at 10 units and increasing by 2 each day until my glucose readings starting showing normal. Right now, I only take this specific insulin before bed.
Mel
Hi folks.
On the tenth of this month it'll be three months since the accident that took Kathy's life.
There have been numerous dedications (songs, local landpaths event, etc.) in her memory.
The ghost bike memorial now sits in our front yard as the city was going to take it down due to neighbors at the accident area complaining.
I've been riding alot.
I met a sweet lady (on New Year's day) (triathlete & marathon runner) whom I've been riding, running and hanging out a bit with.
Biking is her weakest tri-sport, and even though she's 5' even and petite, I have to push to keep up with her on hills. Kathy used to make me work too, so I like that. To be able to keep up I've set some 2007 goals including the Terrible Two (again) and the Leadville 100.
Kathy's memory will not leave me anytime soon. She'll be with me on rides for a long time to come. I like to think she helped me find this special pal.
Maury
Maury, it's good to hear you're healing a bit and getting out and riding in this incredible weather we've been having. My thoughts are with you as you move ahead in your life. Kathy will always be with you.
Maury,
Good vibes coming your way. A strong and loving heart will guide you through almost anything. Keep embracing the sweetness of memories and also the unexpected joys of life's continually twisting journey. :)
Hey Cuz,
It's good to hear from you (yes, TE of course we e-mail from time to time). And yep, those tri-athlete babes are incredible ;) :p :D
I can't keep up with either of you two but let's try to do a ride. I'm sure I could keep up with the recovery meal at least.
This weekend there's a Landpaths event that was dedicated in kathy's honor.
I'll be there. It's the Three Bridges Ride and Roll.
http://www.landpaths.org/
Love to you all,
Maury
Life goes on...
The local paper reported on released results of the investigation as to fault (the driver)
http://tinyurl.com/yr37y5
Thanks for posting the follow up Deanna.
V.